


HOME SWEET HOME

by bevintaged



Category: Mötley Crüe, The Dirt (2019)
Genre: Angst, Bisexual main character, Dubious Consent, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Hiatus, Magic, Masturbation, Mental Health Issues, Sappy stuff, Sex Drugs and Rock and Roll, Slow Burn, Tags May Change, Time Travel, first person POV, slow build-ish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:35:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 71,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22856359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bevintaged/pseuds/bevintaged
Summary: Nikki Sixx may or may not have summoned a girl from the future. This is her experience with the Crue - and then some.
Relationships: Nikki Sixx/Original Female Character(s), Original Female Character(s)/Original Female Character(s), Tommy Lee/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 83
Kudos: 65





	1. Golden Slumbers by The Beatles

**Author's Note:**

> This is such trash. I'm not even kidding. Just as a forewarning. I will be trying to follow the books and the movies as much as I can - and even intertwine them because they are very different from each other. But the movie did lead me into an obsession with this fucking band.

"That was a fucking good movie," I sighed as I rubbed at my face with my left hand, slamming the laptop closed with my right. Despite the fact that I had layered myself in at least three blankets - I still felt a chill crawl up and down my spine. I had a feeling it wasn't going to go away for a while yet. Despite this, I still kept my fan permanently on at the corner of my room.

I was still dressed in everything I had worn earlier that day, sans my shoes. I hadn't even bothered to throw my purse down. It was hard to call it a purse. It was an ugly, perfectly square thing made of cloth. It had a mysterious stain at the bottom, but I had found it in the bottom of my mother's closet and declared my love for it almost instantaneously. Inside of it, get this, was another purse. This purse was far prettier and worked as a wallet as well. Unfortunately, the strap had snapped randomly. It was a shame because it was decorated in cute flowers and had been at least twenty dollars. I had promised myself that I would glue the strap back together, but that had been months ago. I was quite positive that I would never strike up the motivation to fix it.

Along with my second purse, there was money card, of course, otherwise known as a debit card, along with a bottle of black nail polish and of course, my baby, my one-and-only phone. At the very corner of it, it was cracked just a little bit. And there were scratches all over the screen. When I had first gotten my debit card, I had made the habit of accidentally tapping the card against the screen while I was waiting for stuff. I didn't mind or rag on myself about it though. It gave my phone character.

There was a mechanical pencil, some loose sheets of paper, some receipts, a few quarters, and a spare pair of ear-buds. There was a rolled-up charger, a spare, in case I really needed to use it while at my college campus. It was kind of a big purse. I leaned my head back. My room was dark, there were no lights on, and I kept the curtains completely loose and pressed against the window, but I knew that if I flicked through the sheet and looked through the blinds that I would see nothing but daylight.

I hadn't slept in three days.

That was a rarity. It was something I had never done before and it was something I never wished to do again. It wasn't like I didn't want to sleep. Boy, did I want to. I loved sleep. It was probably my second favorite hobby other than drowning myself in music. I loved music more than I loved life itself. Sadly, I didn't love music enough to pursue the art of playing it. I made a much better listener.

I wanted to sleep so badly. You have no idea, but every time the sound of my fan even began to lull me to sleep, my body would jolt, like an electric shock, and I would find my eyes wide open. It was a miserable experience and I would never take sleep for granted ever again.

For the first time in about six hours, I pulled out my phone to look at it. I had one hell of a movie binge. Not a lot of people blew up my phone. There was a text message from my mother: reminding me to apply for more jobs. I had applied to eleven already - not a single call back. Of course, there was also a message from my one, true friend who managed to keep up with me over the course of a year. His name was Joe and he was the closest thing I had ever achieved to having a best friend, even though he was from the Internet.

He had messaged me with a whole ass story about how his girl had thrown a cup of his left-out soda and lectured him on his inability to pick up after himself. Not far from me, laying on my desk, was a line of purple, plastic cups because fuck the environment. Just kidding, but not really. There were about five of them, none of them full, but each of them had a bit of Dr. Pepper in the corners of the cups or dried up on the sides.

I really needed to clean my room.

There was one last message.

"I need you to pick me up from school."

My brother. He was one of many, but the only one I lived with. Our dad was a whore. We had five other brothers. All of their names started with S. I was the outlier, not just as the only girl, but the only one to have a name starting with the letter 'N'...Which was Nova, by the way. He was about sixteen, two-and-a-half years younger than I and he would hold no importance for my future, other than that I would miss him very much.

Did I know this at the time? No.

It wouldn't be long though, because his text message had me sighing and pushing myself out of my bed. Stuffing my feet into a pair of shoes, I did a swift look for my car key, only to relax as I felt the familiar swing to my neck. Once, I had lost my car keys. It was the only time because I had then trapped them on a lanyard and kept them around my neck at all times. My car was far from old and all I had to do was press a button for it to start. No key in the ignition needed.

It's been said that to drive while sleep deprived was just as bad as driving. Of course, I didn't care and neither did my parents and if they found out I had simply left my brother to rot (in case he was, I dunno, puking his guts out) I would proceed to get another lecture on sibling bonds. That was the last thing I needed in my life.

I had turned eighteen on December 11. It was the year 2020. I had graduated last May. Had I been a normal child, I would have been the eldest easily in my class. Instead, I had been reduced to being the youngest because my wise-ass self had decided that it actually wanted to try in elementary school. I had been bumped up to the second grade before I knew it.

Not that it mattered.

I had been friend-less in first grade and just as friend-less in second. I would remain quite the floater until I graduated and after that, I would have nothing to float in. I went to a local community college in an attempt to find myself before I spent nearly a hundred thousand dollars on something I didn't even know if I wanted to do.

All I had was Joe.

And sometimes, just sometimes, I would find a friend in my brother, but those times were rare. Joe was like an elder brother that I had never met nor wanted. I would miss him just as much as I would my real ones when I was gone.

I had stuffed my deodorant in my bag, along with some body spray, just in case. It was something called champagne or something like that. I dug it enough. I had stolen it from my mom and everything. She didn't seem to mind, though. I think I may have sprayed some in my eyes half on accident and half on purpose. I didn't want to risk finally falling into the euphoria known as sleep while driving on the road.

Sometimes, I wanted to die, but never by a car crash.

I should've known that I would've never made it out of the door. I dunno if it was the movement but as I started walking - I could feel the blood rushing to my head and I felt myself swooze. I found myself pressed against the hallway door. I had never stayed up so long before.

There were black spots dancing throughout my sight. I wanted to grasp at them and hold them still for just a moment, but I knew they weren't real. Pressing my face into the cold wall plaster, I let out a heavy breath. An electric jolt shot through my legs and into my spine. I had never felt it while truly awake before. I tried to make it to at least the couch, which was only a few steps away. I made a sort of run for it, but it must have been a pathetic attempt because I could feel myself falling...I couldn't even remember hitting the ground, much less the couch.


	2. Face Down In The Dirt by Motley Crue

I came to with a great pounding in my head. 

Someone was tickling at my face. 

"Wendy, go away," I murmured as I moved to brush her paw off. It was with great terror that I didn't find my beloved, fat cat's paw, but instead the hard shell of something squishy and disgusting. My eyes flew open as I smacked whatever it was away and I watched as one of the largest roaches I had ever seen in my life scurried off. I was in the middle of a room - carpeted. 

My room was definitely not carpeted and for all the slob I was - it definitely didn't have roaches, but as I looked at the room around me it became clear that whoever owned this homemade me look like a neat freak in comparison. 

"Who's Wendy?" Came a semi-tired voice from the other side of the room. I turned my head back and soon realized that the pounding in my head was simply from the fact that there was some skinny dude banging lightly on a drum-set. A guy stood beside him, next to a base guitar. I think we made eye contact. I wasn't too sure because all I could do was stare at him in confusion. 

He had a mane of pitch-black hair that looked like it had been fluffed out in every direction possible. He may have had some make-up on but I couldn't tell from my place on the floor. 

"My fat cat," I murmured as I blinked slowly. 

"We were gonna wake you up earlier but we felt you were uh - more comfortable there." The guy seemed to smirk as if knowing that there had been who knows how many vermin and insects had been feasting and crawling all over me as I slept. "Were you from last night?" 

"Last night?" Last night I had been in my room, as usual. Not here, definitely not with two dudes. 

"Man, she can't even remember," giggled the guy on the drums. "Man, we got so fucked up. I don't even recognize you." 

"That's funny," I stated. "Because I don't recognize either of you." 

"Not even him?" He pointed a drumstick at the guy with the big hair. "You ever heard of London? That's Nikki fucking Sixx." 

And right then and there I wanted to fucking die. 

"London isn't a thing anymore. We're gonna be a new thing. Something even better than London." The guy, supposedly Nikki Sixx, stated with more confidence than I had ever had in my entire life. 

"You've gotta be kidding me." I pushed myself up off the carpet. I looked so fucking different compared to them. On me, I had a black long-sleeved shirt with the Deathly Hallows symbol on it from the Harry Potter franchise and of course, skinny jeans, that had rips in them, and a pair of black-and-white kitten-covered flats. If anything, I was waving a bright, shiny disco ball over my head that screamed "TIME TRAVELER, RIGHT HERE", arrow sign and all. Of course, I thought these guys were a bunch of weird roleplayers, so that didn't stop me from pulling out my phone. 

It drew their interest of course because the only thing that had a screen like mine was something called television. The year was 1981. I just didn't know it yet. I glanced at my screen, bright. The background was a picture of my queen, my idol, Lana Del Rey. She had a red sucker in her mouth. It was one of the images for her, in my humble opinion, worst album ever. But I dug the aesthetic and even dug the album at times, but it was far from her superior work. 

"Fuck, dudes. Do you have any signal around here?" I held up my phone. I really didn't even try to hide it. Of course, I had no idea I had anything to hide. 

Their eyes zoomed in my phone. Lana right up at the screen. I had no shame of my love for her or her music. "What is that?" "Who's that hot chick?" 

"What do you mean, what is that? It's a phone." I said blankly. I was still too tired to catch on. It was a phone that was currently stating not just zero bars, but there was an asterisk, meaning there was literally no signal anywhere in the shitty apartment that I was currently in. 

"That's not a phone." The drummer spoke, even unsure of himself. 

"Of course it is," I insisted. "I mean, it might not be up-to-date, but damn." I looked at both of them as they looked at me. "I think I need to get out of here. Where am I, exactly?" 

"Los Angelos," both of them stated in sync. 

If I had been drinking something - it would have been sprayed all across the room. 

"You're fucking joking." I laughed. "No way, my dudes. I'm from nowhere near California. Like, nowhere. I'm from a small town in.." I stopped speaking as I looked at them, looked at their apartment, and thought of the movie that I had just watched seemingly moments before I had passed out presumably on my living room floor. 

The Dirt. 

It had been the biopic of Motley Crue - a band I hadn't even been interested in until I had seen the movie. It had been my fourth time watching it of course. 

"Are you still drunk, dude?" 

"I don't drink." 

Not technically a lie. Not technically a truth either. I only drank when I was around people I could trust. It was legal to drink with your parents at eighteen where I was from, but with a limited percentage of alcohol. 

I made move to walk forth, towards the door that I think I knew would lead me out, but I almost fell over completely as I began to walk. I protected my phone with my life, of course, but I managed to catch myself just in time from falling. 

It was the Drummer who made the conclusion before either me or "Nikki Sixx". 

"Fuck. Are you a time-traveler?" 

"Uh." My mind blanked. "Sure." I laughed. "Whatever." 

The idea hadn't even occurred to me. I had gotten closer to the two men though. The guy - Nikki Sixx - genuinely looked like fucking Nikki Sixx. He didn't have the same amount of make-up, though. It instead clung to his eyes, faded. He had clearly slept in it. He wore leather, but no heels. Understandable. 

"I'm serious, dude. What the hell is that thing?" 

"It's a phone." I reiterated. "It's a thing you use to call people. Although, I use it for texting. Fuck. Sam is gonna be so mad." 

"Sam?" Nikki Sixx or whatever couldn't seem to stop asking questions. 

"My brother. I was supposed to pick him up from school and then I - I passed out...And I woke up here." 

All of a sudden, my head gave an awful pound. I pressed my phone against my temple. 

"You're a fucking time traveler!" The guy said excitedly. He was like a puppy-dog. Puppy-dog. If he claimed the other guy was Nikki Sixx. It had to mean that this was the Tommy Lee doppelganger. "How sick is that, Nikki?" 

Nikki seemed to be at a loss for words. 

"Woah," he seemed to breathe out. He stared at me intently and it made me quite embarrassed to be looked at like that. Nobody had ever stared at me with such fascination. I knew it wasn't because he was attracted to me, but rather I was like a shiny, exotic animal that had just been dropped into the zoo. And considering the state of his house, it clearly wasn't far off. "I mean - she told me weird shit would happen, but I didn't think...I mean." 

"The girl you fuck in a coffin?" 

"Yeah. We did a - a ritual. I asked...I asked a question. And she said that an answer would be given. I thought it was a bunch of bull-shit, but.." 

I snorted. "Come on. A ritual? You were right. That is bull-shit. I'm out of here." I stuffed my phone back into my purse and pushed past the drummer. I could feel them stare at me as I left. They didn't make a move to stop me. I think they were in too much shock, but as I stepped out into Los Angelos, 1981, I'm surprised I didn't drop dead. 

I saw cars. None of them were in style. I saw dozens upon dozens of people that I knew I would never see in my small-as-fuck town. I really was in Los Angelos - thousands of miles from where I was yesterday. 

There was a shake to my body as I exhaled. My knees wobbled as I clung back to the door and I went back in. "When did you do that ritual?" 

"Like - three days ago?" 

"Fuck. That's why I couldn't sleep." I spoke out loud, realizing how crazy it sounded as I came to slowly but surely accept that they weren't lying. I mean - I'm not an idiot. No matter how much I act and think like one. The cars, the lack of signal, the fact I traveled to L.A. within a matter of hours. My body had been refusing to sleep because it knew that moment my eyes shut - I would be gone, lifted through time and space, and sent to a dingy apartment that belonged to Nikki fucking Sixx. 

Motley Crue had yet to even exist. 

Despite my proclamation earlier, there was nothing more that I wanted than a bunch of alcohol to knock myself out again. I refrained from asking this. Not that I would have been able to ask it anyway. I found myself hitting the floor once more - face first this time.


	3. In Another Land by the Rolling Stones

When I woke up a few moments later - they were actually kind enough to put me up onto the couch. They also had the time to rummage through my things. I found that out soon enough when I woke up and saw Tommy staring down at my phone in awe, toying with it, wiping his hand against the screen, swishing it back and forth.

Half of me wanted to scream.

How dare he touch my phone.

But the other half, the better half, let me cough out, letting them know I was awake. "Rude," I said as I grasped for my phone. He kept it out of my reach. "Dude, you don't even know how to work it. All you gotta do is ask."

"Oh!" He snorted. "Most people don't let me touch their stuff."

He seemed to like to the type to break it, but, this was the Tommy Lee without a few millions. They were a bit more humble, not a lot, but a bit. In a few years, Tommy would've likely had no issue in taking my phone and smashing the screen against a desk or something.

"Well, to be honest," I spoke as I got the phone. "I was tempted to lie. I won't let you touch it, but I will let you look at it with me."

That seemed to be good enough for him.

"Where's Nikki?" I asked as I looked around the room for the infamous bassist.

"He had to go make a call," Tommy explained.

"To his girl?" I asked.

"No, he sells lightbulbs."

"Oh. Interesting."

"Not really." Tommy shrugged his shoulders. "Not as interesting as the fact you're a fucking time traveler."

"You're really stuck on that idea," I spoke faintly.

"Duh! What else could you be? I mean look at you."

Once again, I was made to feel uncomfortable. I had dyed my hair into a sort of indigo shade. There were blues and purples and it was totally awesome. Totally expensive, though. Apparently, it wasn't that common in the eighties. I had kept my hair chopped to my shoulders though and never did much with it. I liked to think it did enough on its own.

"But also...Your...Phone." He glanced down at the rectangular-shaped object in my hands. "Dude, you should see the phones we have. They're nothing like that."

"I figure. Nineteen-eighty something right?"

"Nineteen-eighty-one," Tommy confirmed. "January 20th."

"Oh, man. That's. Okay."

"What year are you from?"

"Year?" My brain seemed to fry for a moment before I stammered out. "2-2020."

"2020! That's only like forty years!"

"What? Did you expect me to come from like the year 3005 or something."

"No, no. I just..Look at your phone. It's rad."

"Just wait until you can see it get signal. That's what really makes it rad. It connects to the Internet and everything."

"Internet?" Tommy questioned.

"Yeah...Fuck. Lemme guess. That's not a thing either."

Tommy grinned and shook his head. "Nope."

I definitely, definitely wanted to die.

Nikki came back out from his closet. That's what it looked like at least. He looked between the two of us. I couldn't help but stare at him. He was really fucking attractive, not gonna lie. He and Tommy both. Luckily, I wasn't one to leave me dick in control. Not that I had one of those anyway.

He smirked. "See something you like?"

I refused to answer to a shitty line like that. I looked back down to my phone. It was only about half-way out of battery. "Do you have an outlet?" I asked, although in my head, I felt more like begging. If I were in the past - forty-fucking years in the past - this was the only connection I had to my old life. I needed to treasure it and protect it as much as possible.

They pointed at the outlet that their amp was hooked up to. I automatically knew that I would be forbidden from touching their instruments. Just a silent, respect sort of thing. Who knows where they had been anyway.

I unrolled my charger. "Is there another one?"

"No." Nikki shrugged.

"Damn. I'm gonna need one, soon. This is what charges my phone." I flicked through some of the apps. The time was frozen and the calendar app crashed. However, I clicked on my music folder and sighed in relief as all of my thousands upon thousands of songs had been saved. They seemed to be intent on watching how my phone worked.

"So you use that to call and uh - text people."

"Yes."

"And it also lets you look up maps, dates, music, and games?"

"Uhuh. All sorts of stuff, man." I stated. "This is the fucking future, right here. Don't break it. It's all I have at this point, really."

I don't even think at this point in time that I really understood what the hell I had just gotten myself into. I think they must have decided they were done jamming out for the day. I suppose I had interrupted that.

"So question?" I asked. I had given in and let Tommy look at my phone - and yes - let him touch it. I had made him swear on his life that he wouldn't break it. I trusted him at that moment. He was more of an innocent kid than a douchebag ruined by drugs, groupies, and constant partying. "Where exactly am I going to be staying?"

Nikki shrugged his shoulders and looked around at his apartment. "You seemed fine sleeping on the floor. There's just enough room for another person in my closet."

"I'll take the floor."

Honestly, I don't know why I acted so repulsed. I think it was partially because I had never even held hands with a guy - much less slept next to one. One that would be a relatively huge fucking rock-star and was already pretty smug over his success with London.

"Wait-" Tommy spoke out. "I think I have a place you can stay."

"For real?"

"Yeah! The people that live there are really nice! And I can just say that you're from out of town, you're broke and homeless."

"I mean that's all true-"

"Let's go now!" Tommy pumped up a fist. He looked at Nikki. "Mind if we go? I'll be back tomorrow."

"Bring her, too," Nikki stated. "Not every day we find an actual time traveler. Plus, she's my fucking responsibility. I just don't feel like having a chick live here."

There was something off about it. I didn't like to think I interested Nikki anymore than the obvious. I was a time-traveler...I was a time-traveler. Just repeating those words made me woozy but I grasped at Tommy's shoulder and kept myself steady.

"You good, dude? Dudette?"

"Dude's fine. Dudette is just fucking lame."

"Agreed," Tommy laughed.

I then looked back through the door. Nikki was trying to stare at his bass guitar and avoid looking as though he was paying more attention to us. "Oi Sixx," I called out. He looked up. "What question did you ask?"

He snorted.

"I think I deserve to know."

"Oh yeah, well fuck you." He pressed his fingers against the chords before pausing. "I asked if I would be successful."

I blinked - that hadn't been what I was expecting. "You mean you didn't ask that some chick from the year 2020 wakes up on your floor to a roach crawling on her face?"

He didn't answer. I didn't mind. Tommy and I could have perfectly good conversations on our own.

"So about this place? You sure they'll be good-"

"Hell yeah-"

His car wasn't so bad. It was actually kind of nice. I should've known when we rolled up a house with a literal picket-fence that I realized where exactly he had brought me to. He wasn't wrong though.

"Mom, Dad, this is-" He tried to introduce me but the both of us knew that he didn't even know my flipping name. We hadn't yet gotten to that point. I suppose the fact that I was a time-traveler had bypassed all the other details.

"Nova Delacroix," I answered quickly, so as not to raise suspicion.

"French?" Mr. Bass laughed.

I jerked my head and nodded uncomfortably. "Yeah, somewhat."

Mr. and Mrs. Bass was some of the nicest people I had ever met and seemed perfectly willing to let me stay - at least until I got back on my feet.

It was hard to look at Tommy as I saw his parents. They seemed so proud, no matter what. It was kind of nice. I knew all the drama of course. Tommy Lee was going to turn into a piece of shit. Nikki Sixx would become this extremely friendly, open guy who was vehemently anti-drugs and a hero to many. Mick Mars would remain as cool as ever. Vince Neil would grow fat and lose his ability to sing.

That was gonna be the after-math of Motley Crue.

Already, the weight of knowing the future was beginning to sink on my shoulders.


	4. 2000 Light Years From Home by The Rolling Stones

Nikki and Tommy were looking for a guitar player, and then, of course, a singer. Luckily, I knew them by name. However, they weren't getting a snippet out of me. I knew their future. I didn't really want to change it. Apart of me felt that it simply wasn't my place to do so.

Nikki had summoned me away from my home. I don't know how he did it. I didn't even know it was possible, but he managed. I'm not even sure if he knew that it was possible. I bet it had something to do with blood or fire or sex. A ritual that seemed dark and twisted and totally cool because that's just what Nikki Sixx was all about.

It was clear that the whole time-travel thing wasn't doing it for me.

Not that I minded being sent back into the 1980s, but it was a different time, obviously. There was all sorts of bacteria roaming around that had taken a liking to fuck with my system.

The smell of puke was prominent in the guest room that I had been given for the time being. I held my sweat-coated hair back as my throat burned, nothing but acid and water funneling out of my nose and mouth. I was used to throwing up, but normally it was with chunks of food or some shit. It didn't normally scorch my throat up.

"She's been sick for days, Tommy. Where did you pick her up?" I could hear them talk outside of my door. I think maybe they might have thought I had brought the plague into their house or something but I knew. I don't how I knew but there was no way I would've gotten the sick if it weren't time travel related.

Tommy came through the door.

"Jeez. Sorry, dude. This fucking sucks. Nikki is pissed that I can't bring you back yet."

"Screw Nikki." I coughed out - my voice sounded absolutely obliterated, torn to hell and back. "Seriously, screw him." I emphasized. "Brings me back from my time. Didn't even let me offer to stay at his place and now I'm as sick as sick can be. Not that I'd want to stay at his filthy place anyway."

When I got sick - I got angry or needy, sometimes both, but this time it was most definitely angry. I was currently drowning in blankets. I was wearing a nightgown that wasn't my own. My clothes had been folded neatly and placed on a chair. Although, Tommy had pushed them aside and made room for himself. He instead insisted on not just focusing on my phone, but also on the set of keys that I had held dangling around my neck.

"Where's the key?"

"What?"

"For your car?"

"That's it," I started weakly, looking at the device. "For my car, all you need is that and you press a button for the car to turn on."

"I dunno." Tommy shrugged. "There's just something so awesome about starting up my car - with the key and everything."

"I feel you, man." I gave a small smile. "But I got that car from my mom so I ain't gonna complain."

"Dang. It must have been a steal."

"Yeah. My mom got herself a really nice car that was about fifty-sixty thousand dollars." I said off-handedly.

"Sixty thousand dollars!" Tommy exclaimed, his eyes going wide. "Dude, you're fucking loaded."

I shrugged and rolled my eyes, thinking back on my parents.

"I just have parents that make bad financial investments." I almost missed them. Just almost. I missed coming home and getting asked how my day was. I was truly alone because neither Nikki nor Tommy was successful enough to pay for all my shit. If they even would and I would never ask that of Mr. and Mrs. Bass. They weren't the ones to summon me here. Nikki had been, even if it was on accident. We hadn't even really been able to afford the car, but my mom was weak and unable to resist, stacking on another few hundred dollar car note that would last us seven years or so.

"Still, dude. I bet it was a sweet ride."

"It wasn't a sports car," I interjected. "It's a very mom-like car, trust me. But cars in the future will have back-up cameras, you can connect your phones to them, so you can call at the same time."

"For real! Man - that's forty years away? Am I even alive then?"

"Yeah, probably nearing sixty or something." For some reason, Tommy had yet to ask any questions pertaining towards his and Nikki's success as musicians. Perhaps, he hadn't even thought of asking? But that seemed silly or maybe he was smart enough to know that knowing that shit could cause serious consequences.

Tommy wrinkled his nose before a goofy grin stretched over his face. "You must know of me, then."

"No!" I protested a bit too loudly. "You're just my age is all. In forty years, I'll be just as...Just as...old."

I wanted to put my head in my hands before I felt the urge to puke up my guts once more. My throat and nose stung as I held the large bucket outwards. "Tommy, be a dear and empty this for me."

Tommy groaned but took it anyway.

"How much music you have on here, anyway?"

"Luckily, I downloaded a shit ton of music just in the case the apocalypse came," I said as if it were a perfectly normal thing to say, but for me it was. The idea of being stranded without my tunes - it made me want to curl up and cry. I was so happy to know that my charger still worked as well as my earbuds and my phone itself. If Tommy doubted the fact I was from the future - he most certainly didn't when he saw the coins in my purse, the dates imprinted on them. I was thankful for his willingness to simply believe that something like time travel even existed. "A few thousand songs, maybe?"

"A few thousand!" His eyes widened. "You really like music."

"Hell yeah, dude."

"Do you rock?"

"Sometimes. I'm not a musician though. I just enjoy music, my guy."

It didn't take long for me to get over the sickness. Occasionally, I'd feel a very similar, electric jolt jump up my legs, but I seemed to have started walking just fine.

"Thank you so much, Mrs. Bass, for taking me in and helping me. It really means a lot. I wish I had the money to repay you for your kindness." I gushed to the kind, motherly Greek woman.

"No, no." She said, her accent still tangible. "You are fine. You seem like a nice girl. We just want you to be safe. Also, dear. I fixed your jeans for you. I noticed that they were uh - a bit worn."

She showed me what she had done to my beloved jeans with a bright smile. Tommy's smile. I tried to smile back as I saw that she had done her best to sew in all of the scratches and holes that had made me love them so much. I then realized that my appearance had probably been another reason for taking me in. The scratches in my jeans, I'm sure my dead-eyed look didn't help either.

Either I was some punk or I was homeless, probably both.

"I appreciate that, Mrs. Bass. I can't thank you enough."

I knew that the moment I got out of their house that I would be undoing the stitches that had been sewn in. Of course, definitely not while I still lived there. I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

I soon met Tommy's current girlfriend that I knew wouldn't last. She was a short Mexican girl who was named Jessica. She didn't like me from the moment she saw me, presumably of some sort of jealousy. Tommy was quite attractive, but I had neither the confidence nor the skills to make my movies on a clearly besotted man. In the movies, she went by another name, Bullwinkle. Quite mean and I would never call her that, but apparently they had a fondness for cruel nicknames pre-2000s. I never got to experience that life. My name was a joke on its own.

Nova seemed like a weird, quirky stripper name. Alone with Naomi and Neveah. Names destined to dance on the pole. I didn't have stripper skills either, in case you were wondering. I had been sick for a week straight. Tommy and Nikki were officially a thing and were slowly trying to flesh out their band.

They needed a singer and a guitarist.

I knew them.

They didn't.

I wasn't quite sure if I could point them out just yet without feeling like I was gonna ruin the universe. I think that Nikki was beginning to get a little impatient and wanted to see me again for some reason. Tommy had to drag me up out of bed. I was still a little sick, but I could walk, as stated, and I certainly didn't feel like dealing with anyone's shit. Although, Nikki had yet to really be an asshole towards me. I somewhat blamed him for me landing here. Granted, he didn't know it would really work.

But it had.

He had a girl, someone with witchy vibes and bit into dark magic. She was a drummer in a band. That's who he lived with. Her name was Laura Bell.

"Whatever you do," Tommy warned me as we drove there. "Do not lay any of your food in a place you cannot protect it."

He stated this so seriously that I didn't even bother to doubt his wisdom and simply nodded. Of course, I had my phone in my bag, fully charged and my earbuds and every time I would go to place one in - Tommy would continue talking and I was too polite to tell him off for doing so. The last thing I needed was to bite at the hand that fed me. It was kind of odd how Tommy had somewhat taken responsibility over me. I think it was because he didn't even bother to hide his fascination with the future. He had been the one to come to the conclusion first, after all. Had it just been Nikki and I - I doubt either of us would even dare think of the possibility of the fact that some dark magic ritual had worked and I was brought here.

The timing fit too well and I couldn't deny it the fact that I had been plopped down in 1981.

1981.

"Dude," I murmured. "My mom isn't even born yet."

"For real?"

"Yeah. I really, really shouldn't even be here." I tried to say it as happily and as easy-going as possible but not even Tommy could hold it back.

"That really fucking sucks."

I nodded my head. "Yeah, it does."

Keeping my eyes pointed out the car window, I tried not to tear up.

She was a bit of bitch, constantly harping on this and that, but she cared and she loved me. I loved her. We had never been separated for so long before. I wasn't so sure how long I could keep up the pretense that I was fine having been thrown back forty years.


	5. Great Expectations by KISS

We got to the shitshack, a nickname Tommy had given to Nikki's place, I could hear the sound of his bass guitar. They had a whole set up in the front of the room. They had fired their guitarist previously and were on the search for a newer, better one that fit the image they were going for.

"Man, if only you could play. You could be in our band. Plenty of women rock hard, I'm sure." He said. "We could be like the Time Fuckers or something."

"The Time Fuckers," I wheezed out. "The fuck, dude. Yes, I love it. In an imaginary world, where I have some talent, we'd be called the Time Fuckers."

"That's such a shitty name," Nikki stated as we told him of our theoretical plan. The more I looked at Nikki Sixx, the more I began to slowly swoon over him in my mind. Just a little bit. I didn't display my blossoming crush openly. I had a lot of experience with hiding my crushes. I think because I acknowledged them and dealt with them privately. I knew that in the end - I was gonna find a way back to my time. My phone would only last for so long and I don't think I could stretch its use up to forty years. I think even that went a bit far.

There was a guy in there already practicing. His name was Robin and he had a mop of blonde hair, it was kind of cool, but it was so obvious, even to me, that he did not belong in with either Tommy nor Nikki. I empathized with that. I was so normal in comparison, even with my shade of hair. I was a fucking vanilla wafer, you know. I didn't party hard or like to drink or do drugs.

I wasn't against it, per se.

I just never developed any interest in it.

Robin was the type of guy that tucked in his shirt and he washed his hands and he looked around Nikki's apartment in constant disgust. Nikki didn't seem like the type of guy to take judgment to well and I could tell he was beginning to crack. He was tuning up his guitar in the form of scales. He was good with the guitar, but he seemed to turn red whenever I looked at him. I wasn't quite sure how to take that.

"He doesn't fit," I murmured.

Nikki heard me and raised his eyebrow. He nodded in agreement as he slug himself onto the couch. I could see pills tucked into crevices and there who knows how many cumstains that had sunk into the beaten, leather couch.

"What took you so long...Nova?"

He tested out my name and it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight up. Had I not been wearing my long-sleeved shirt - he likely would've been able to see the goosebumps rising up on my skin.

"How'd you figure out my name?" I snorted.

Nikki eyed Tommy from across the room.

"Oh, right. I guess Tommy told you."

It had sounded so much cooler in my head.

"Cool name, though."

My heart fluttered. What the absolute fuck?

"Thanks," I nodded along with my statement as if that didn't make me seem anymore awkward. "I was sick. I'm sure Tommy mentioned that too."

"He did. I dunno if I believed it though."

"Bruh, if you want me to puke all over your house. I will, I promise." I laughed at the thought of actually doing it. It was a fucking shit hole of a home, but it was still his. It was hard for me to know when my jokes were too far or not. Nikki had this permanent smirk on his face, often a sneer as well. I had seen interviews from the eighties and he had always seemed like a pleasant, articulate guy. Hell, I saw a lot of his interviews in the future but I had read his books. The guy was an asshole. He knew he was. He wasn't any longer, but he had been for a good thirty years of his life.

"Bruh?"

"Dude," I explained. "It means like dude or bro or whatever. It's just a dumb thing from 2020."

"2020?" Robin spoke up.

I blinked. I forgot that he was even in the room. There was this quick silence where none of us could think of what to say. After all, we hadn't exactly declared my existence a secret.

"Nova's a time traveler," Tommy said as though it was the most normal concept in the world. He did it with the same stupid smile on his face that he always seemed to wear.

Robin snorted and rolled his eyes, "Right."

Robin soon left because he was an old man who needed to be home by six on the weekdays. He wasn't really that old, but he was younger than Nikki. As soon as he left, I found a beer placed in my hand and two of Motley Crue's most notorious members talking rapidly and deciding plans of the future.

"We need to find someone way more badass." Nikki said.

Tommy placed a newspaper - it had a number on it, circled. "I like the sound of that guy."

"Loud, rude, and aggressive guitarist available." Nikki read out loud. I practically repeated the words under my breath. Mick Mars was probably the coolest character of that movie. So little of its attention, but damn, he didn't need it. His few seconds made so much sense for him.

I took a small swig of the beer and cringed as I did so. It tasted like shit.

"Did you mind that I told him you were a time-traveler?"

"Uhhh...I don't think he believed you." I giggled as I thought about the look on Robin's face. "But yeah, about that. It raises some possible concerns. One, I don't exist here. Therefore, I am technically-"

"An alien!" Tommy enthusiastically said out loud.

"Well - I was gonna say illegal. But sure, alien works. I don't have any papers. None. No citizenship, no license, no job. How the hell am I gonna do shit?"

"That-" Nikki paused. "-Is a good question."

"Well, when we become the most successful band of all time. You don't need to worry about that." Tommy said pridefully, with nothing but pure glee in his eyes. He took a swig of his own beer. Well, the one swig turned into several large gulps.

"We become the most successful band of all time?" Nikki raised his brow.

I flushed, "I didn't say that."

It wasn't even true.

They did achieve great success, but the most successful band of all time? Hell, no. That title still belonged to the Beatles. I was sure of that, for a fact.

"Anyway," I changed the subject. "I think maybe we should keep it secret, for now. To be honest, I don't feel like getting dissected for something that isn't there. We all bleed blue, here."

"Dude, but we have red blood. Oh my fucking god."

I couldn't keep a straight face after Tommy kept looking at me like I really was an alien. "I'm joking man," I said. "I have red blood, trust me. I'm just a time traveler. But still. Time travel isn't supposed to exist. I don't feel answering weird questions or tortured by like the CIA or some shit."

"Okay - keep it a secret, got it." Tommy nodded.

A week passed after that incident. I had only been back to Nikki's place twice. The other time I had met his girlfriend - who was often absent. She actually had a job, but otherwise, didn't like to spend time in her own shitty home. I didn't wonder why. I wouldn't want to spend my time there, either.

Within that week, however, I made sure to go because the legendary Mick Mars would soon make his appearance. I wanted to be there to see it, to see him for the first time. It was weird how my presence seemed to be accepted so easily. I don't think I would have been able to do the same. Time travel? Ha, please.

"Hey, Nova. I was thinking - maybe you wanted to go out sometime?" Robin said so nervously on the day of Mick's impending arrival. Awkward. I had never had some guy ask me out before so I was very flattered but unable to compute much.

I froze, my mouth ajar. My automatic answer was no but somehow I was simply unable to speak. It turns out - I didn't have to.

"Nah, dude," Tommy spoke up. "Trust me, you ain't her type."

"I think she can answer for herself!" Robin sputtered.

"She likes the good puss'," Tommy interjected, almost mournfully so.

My eyes widened dramatically at his comment. "Tommy?" I questioned. "The fuck?"

Tommy gave me a weird look. "Well, you do, don't you?"

"Wh-what the hell makes you say that?" I stammered. I had not uttered a word on my sexuality. I mean, he was half-right, but still. I felt heavily called out.

"So you don't?" Robin asked hopefully.

"Don't what?"

"You don't like the...good...Women?"

I bit my lip. "No, I'm sorry Robin, but I do."

"Oh."

"I mean I like men, too."

"So is that a yes?"

"Still a no, I'm sorry." I visibly cringed as I repositioned myself on the leather couch. I had my earbuds in my ears and my phone hidden into my bag. Robin had questioned as to what they were but I had explained that it was an upcoming fashion. He had accepted that answer.

"I expected the women bit, but men too?" Nikki questioned.

"Yes, men too." I reiterated.

He and Tommy looked me up and down with nothing but doubt in their eyes. I guess I didn't have to worry about them being attracted to me. They had already written me off as a lesbian beforehand. I couldn't tell if I should feel insulted or not, but I didn't have time to think upon it before there was a timid knock at the door.

There was a feeling of pure elation that gripped my heart. He was here. Tommy went to open the door. His hair was pitch black and longer than I expected it to be. He wore a pair of high platform shoes. He looked completely uncomfortable.

"Nikki, come out here. You gotta check this dude out!" Tommy exclaimed as he turned his head-full of hair back.

Nikki practically ran up to the door and almost jumped into the hair with how excited he was. He pulled Tommy to the side. "I can't believe it. Another one like us!"

Another guy followed behind him. He was quite tiny in comparison to even Mick. I would soon learn that his name was John Crouch. It didn't take long for Mick to whip out his guitar and soon to blast everyone away with just absolutely, maddening talent in comparison to Robin. There was a resigned look in his eyes as if he knew what was coming. I could barely stop myself from fangirling.

He then looked at both Robin and I before pausing and stating, "What's with the hippie and the twelve-year-old."

My mouth fell open. HOW RUDE. I mean - I still loved him, but I frowned deeply as I crossed my arms. I probably looked even more like a kid while doing so. I had one of those faces. It was a fact I didn't like to think about. I mean it wasn't like I didn't have boobs. They were there - I can promise you that. "Excuse you, I turned eighteen last December 11."

Nikki gave a weird look. I didn't notice it though. I was too busy being offended.

I was short, though. Not that short, but short enough. I blame it on the lack of fruit. I hated most fruits with passion. Not their flavors, but their texture. It was a weird thing I had. "Whatever," he stared hard, his beady eyes practically glowing beneath his tangents of hair. "Let's go get some schnapps."

I had never even had a Schnapp.

And then off the three of them went, leaving me with Robin, who glared at me sulkily from his place at his guitar. I could see him trying to emulate the fast speed at which Mick's fingers had flown, but I knew that both Nikki and Tommy were already hooked on Mick, just as I was.

They came back soon enough with a gallon of schnapps. Whatever that still was.

"C'mon, try itttt. It's fruity." Tommy emphasized. "Girls like the fruity stuff, right?"

Peer pressure got to me and I stiffly drank the fruity drink. It wasn't so bad. I wasn't going to get completely sloshed though. I had never been drunk before. I wasn't planning to start. Attaining a light buzz was enough for me.

"It's...not bad." I nodded with a small smile.

"Seee - I told yooou."

I watched as they proceeded to drink more and more. I had only a bit more. I was a watcher, not a participant. Even Robin had some. They began to play some more, although Robin struggled to keep up with their chemistry. He didn't, in the end, that much was obvious. It was so obvious, in fact, that Mick stopped in the middle of playing, and turned, sighing as he did so: "You're out of here. There's only one guitar player in my band, and that's me."

Robin looked at all four of them with sad, doe-like eyes. I almost felt bad for the guy. His face grew tight and red as he dropped his guitar and promptly burst into tears. I take back my previous statement. I, without a single doubt, felt bad for him.

"Now that that pansy is gone," Nikki cheered boisterously. "Let's jam."

And jam they did, until of course, Nikki began to focus on Tommy. Both he and Mick had jet black hair and while Tommy's hair was long and wavy and generally quite awesome to look at - they came to a decision. The brown hair had to go.

The sink was caked in black dye. I looked at Nikki's oddly attractive rat's nest that was constantly kept up via hairspray that would no doubt be declared illegal by the time I was born. He really did live in filth and he had no problem with it either.

When finished, it almost took my breath away. It was so bizarre to look at them and just know that I was about to witness their rise to greatness. I think it may have been the alcohol lowering my impulse control, but I pulled out my phone and promptly took a picture right then and there. The flash shocked all three of them, who looked at me. Nikki and Tommy knew what was up.

"What is that, kid?" Mick Mars barked out as he eyed my phone with suspicion.

"Uh..." I frantically stuffed my phone into my purse. "You didn't see that."

"I sure as hell did see that."

"Nova, can we spill?" Tommy begged. "He's in the band."

"I'm from the-"

"She's from the future." Tommy finished before me as he excitedly rubbed his hands through his newly black hair.

Mick seemed to be rethinking joining the band right then and there. He then walked over and silently asked to look at my phone. I handed it to him, trusting him to not break it. He analyzed it and clicked all of the buttons and slid his hands over the screen.

"Okay," Mick said. "I don't think you're a bunch of lunatics. What was the flashing thing?"

"I took a picture." I shrugged as I took back the phone, unlocked it, and pulled up the picture. They all looked at it. They were happy - even Mick Mars seemed to be having a good time.

"My bathroom looks like shit." Nikki chuckled.

"It's a memory!" I smiled.

"Do you have more pictures on that?"

"Yeah, I do."

Nikki seemed to wait for a moment as if waiting for me to say something. I clenched my hands over my phone possessively.

"Sweet!" Tommy cheered. "Let's see some of the future!"

"Hahahahhahaha. No."

"What?" Tommy pouted.

Nikki's eyes gleamed suspiciously. I could sense it before it happened. I made move to stuff my phone back into my purse. His hands beat me to it and they snatched my phone away.

"Ay! Careful with it!" I warned. "If it smashes, I will cry forever until I die."

He rolled his eyes as he kept the phone above his head, knowing that I would try and take it back. He swiped at the screen. He seemed to figure out how to work it and he looked at the pictures eagerly. He held up a picture. It was of me and my Nonna. She was the number one person in my life. "Who is this?"

"My Nonna and I."

"She's cool with you dyeing your hair that color?"

"Bro. My Nonna dyes her hair all sorts of colors. That photo just has her while it's all faded. If you look closely, you can see some strands of purple."

Nikki snorted. "You got a cool grandma."

"Thank you. I know."

"And these girls?" He thrusted my phone back into my face. There was a photo of my friends from my junior year of high school. There were three of them and then there was me. I was standing off to the side, a grump look on my face.

I eyed them sadly. "They're no one special."

"For real?" Nikki raised a brow. "They seem kind of special."

"Dude, you were kind of fat," Tommy remarked offhandedly. I winced. I hated pictures of myself. I had meant to delete it.

Nikki slapped the back of Tommy's head.

"I knowwww." I laughed awkwardly.

"Wait a minute," Nikki said. "Is that a tattoo?"

"Which one?" I asked.

"You have multiple?" He said, rather shocked. Apparently it wasn't common for girls to have tattoos in 1981, but I was a time traveler for fuck's sake, it was clear that I was anything but common.

As a matter of fact, I had three tattoos. On my collarbone was a simple outline of a chicken. It was tiny and cute and there was no color to it. It had been my grandma's spirit animal. She had over forty chicken and or rooster figurines in her home. The first one I had ever gotten was a wicked black cat on the back of my neck. It had a menacing smile with sharp teeth that had reminded me of the Cheshire cat. My last one was easy. It was the Deathly Hallows symbol on my back, near the left shoulder blade.

As he kept swiping, I began to grow increasingly aware of just how many photos I had on my phone. I was sure that I had deleted all of my nudes. Damn-near positive, in fact. Nikki abruptly stopped and he turned to look at Tommy. "Dude, we got to get you some tattoos. It'll really fit our look. Besides, we can't have Nova over here have more tattoos than you do."

And that was how I saw the Sunset Strip all lit up for the first time. It was bright and there were wildly dressed people all about. There was the sound of music booming across the entire strip. We could see prostitutes, smoking cigarettes on corners. There were shady drug dealers lurking about, but more importantly, there were several tattoo shops open.

We proceeded to watch as Tommy got a really dumb tattoo of Mighty Mouse. Nobody else said a word on how absurd it was so neither did I. As Mick made fun of Tommy for having a low pain tolerance, Nikki had stayed by my side. He was staring at me, bemused.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," Nikki smirked. "Just - nice tits."

I felt my mouth drop open and my face lit up like a flame. I kept my eyes on the needle currently placing ink into Tommy's skin and refused to look at Nikki in the eyes for the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FUTURE EDIT: I just went through a changed a lot of the titles into that of song titles. Did I make this one a KISS song? Yes. Because MIck hates them and I find that funny. Robin is a real character btw in the book. Just lettin ya'll know that. A lot of this random stuff mentioned ACTUALLY happened.


	6. Smokin' In The Boys Room by Motley Crue

There were a lot of problems with having been sent back in time with basically nothing but my phone. All I had was a single outfit, the one I had been wearing, and a few purse basics (some extra cash, tampons, that sort of stuff). Despite my insistence, Mrs. Bass had refused to let me wear the same outfit for more than three days in a row. In fact, she had managed to convince herself that Athena and I were the same sizes.

I had just managed to squeeze into a pair of high-waisted jeans. Barely. It was a tight fit and I knew that when I took them off, there would be a tight, red band that stretched across the entirety of my stomach. I had also been loaned a sweater that was big and poofy around the sleeves, despite this the sweater was tight and it showed my stomach when I lifted my arms all the way. Athena didn't seem to mind sharing.

"Better you than my brother," she snorted. "You know those leopard-print leggings he likes to wear. Those are mine."

"We've never had someone stay so long at our house before." Athena smiled, sitting across from me. "It's kind of cool. You can keep that sweater, by the way. I got that from our Aunt - she lives in Michigan...It's not really my thing."

"Oh, cool. Thanks!" It wasn't really my thing either, but I was grateful.

It was breakfast time at the Bass household. I dunno how Tommy managed to wake up in the early morning and act as goofy as usual but I knew for a fact that he, Mick, and Nikki were staying up basically all night and hanging around the Starwood til dawn. There was a chance he didn't even sleep. And sleep, boy did I miss it for those two days. I took advantage of being able to do so.

Unfortunately, every so often, I grew weary of it. What if one day I woke up and I was back home? As much as I missed it - I didn't want to leave 1981 just quite yet. This was still an experience that I would treasure for all eternity. Time-travel. The only reason I knew it wasn't a dream was because I had been miserable and sick for days. I had spewed enough of my guts to know that if it were all a dream - I would've woken up by now.

It was at breakfast time. I saw him wearing his signature leopard print pants, Athena's leggings, with a large, dorky smile plastered on his face. "You should totally join us at the Starwood, Nova. All the biggest bands on the Sunset Strip play there." He stated; a piece of bacon in his mouth.

"The Starwood? Not really my scene."

"Yeah but it's our scene. You're basically one of us. We've been trying to scout out singers."

"I don't have anything to wear." I shrugged.

"Just borrow some of Athena's clothes."

I rolled my eyes. "Tommy, I can barely fit into Athena's clothes as it is. Plus, I doubt she has anything appropriate for a club. She's like what, fifteen."

"Still. Come with us tonight. It'll be fun. I promise."

He flashed me a smile that was so wide, bright and chipper that I didn't even have the capacity to say no. There used to be a time where I didn't fancy myself as giving into peer pressure. Clearly, times were a-changing.

There were the loud sounds of music that poured out into the open side-walk besides the Starwood. I had decided to simply stay in my completely under-dressed outfit. I could see people look at me and snicker to themselves. Aside from my, admittedly, epic hair, there was literally nothing that screamed that I loved to party. It wasn't even poofed. I kept it close to my shoulders and it waved naturally on its own, but otherwise, there was nothing done to it. I didn't want to fucking douse it in hairspray. I was an automatic nerd alert. Tommy didn't notice, and even if he did, he didn't seem to mind.

The eighties fashion had yet to hit it's wild, colorful peak. It was still early in the decade, luckily for me. I could handle the seventies fashion, the sixties fashion, and the nineties fashion, but to be honest, the eighties, fashion-wise, was one of the least appealing. I suppose that's why it's remembered so well. It's so crazy and spontaneous, ugly or not, that the image is forever seared into the pages of history.

We got stopped on our way in.

"Is she eighteen?" The bouncer asked. He was a big guy and he looked down with a sneer.

"Yes!" I declared. "Why does everyone doubt my age? I'm just a little on the short side."

Tommy briskly whispered into her ear, "Flash your tits."

"Excuse me?" I stated, appalled.

Tommy egged her on.

"Either you show your I.D. or get outta here," the bouncer declared.

I clenched my fists and tucked my hands under my sweater before bringing it up, along with the edge of my bra, and I did indeed flash my tits for a good five seconds before bringing my sweater down as quickly as I could.

"Enjoy your time at the Starwood," the bouncer said politely and let both Tommy and I in.

"I didn't think you'd actually do it." Tommy wheezed. We pushed through sets of moving bodies, who were jamming out to the rock band playing at the moment.

My cheeks were as red as a tomato.

First, Nikki and now some bouncer at the Starwood. I hadn't even been in the eighties for a full month and two dudes had already seen my boobs. I had even gone through my phone again for all the nudes (and yes - unfortunately - I had missed around three). Luckily, the other two were so far back that I doubt Nikki got to those. I made sure he never would.

We found the table where Nikki and Mick sat. They had already been through a few drinks.

"What took you so long, Drummer?"

Tommy pointed at me. "Look at who I got! And you won't believe what just happened!"

I immediately slapped at his arm. "Tommy, don't you dare-"

"Nova flashed the bouncer." He said anyway.

"Nova?" Nikki snorted. "You didn't. No way. You're such a fucking prude."

I sniffed, tilting my nose upward. I crossed my arms over my chest. "I did, actually. He wanted to see my papers. Papers that I do not have."

"You know." Nikki patted at the table as we seated ourselves along-side them. "I take it back. You're not that much of a prude. I forgot about those pictures."

"What pictures?" Tommy asked, oblivious to the fact that Nikki had found my nudes.

I pressed my head against the table and groaned. "Will my humiliation never end?"

"She had boob pictures." Nikki let my not-so-secret slip.

"For real! Lemme see!" Tommy snorted as he forgot just exactly who he was talking to.

"Hell no, I'm not letting you see." I lifted my head up and glared at him.

"But you showed Nikki!" Tommy whined.

"On accident," I snorted. "Besides, I deleted them. They're gone forever."

"There was more than one?" Nikki teased.

I scowled. "Maybe there was, maybe there wasn't. You'll never know."

Nikki then left for a few quick seconds. I got a spritzer to drink. It kicked in a very light buzz that made my fingers and head tingle somewhat blissfully. All three of them looked at me as though I were a monster. To think? I didn't want to get black-out drunk. Even Mick would have a love for alcohol that would surpass all other addictions.

Nikki soon came back with a bag. He put on the table.

"Sweet, blow!" Tommy cheered.

I blinked at the finely chiseled white dust. This was cocaine. They were about to snort cocaine. What was even happening? I knew that Motley Crue was infamous for drugs. Tommy and Nikki more-so than the rest of the group. I had yet to see them go wild, though.

"You wanna try it?" Tommy asked as he sniffed it in. He tried to offer me a bump. I shook my head. Flashing my tits had been enough excitement for the day.

"We're holding auditions for the group tomorrow. Nikki wants you to join us. We're in a search for a singer." Mick began to speak out. He seemed to be the only one who refrained from the cocaine on the table, aside from myself.

"Why does he need me to join?"

We looked at the two boys - who had decided that they were going to rock out with some of the ladies in the crowd. "I have no idea," Mick stated frankly. "Something about having a girl's opinion. It won't be so bad though. I don't know how you've managed to keep these knuckleheads in line for so long."

"For so long? Mick, I haven't even been here a full month."

"I know," Mick said. "But I've only been here for about a week and I've wanted to blow my brain out at least three times." He glanced at the empty bottle at my side. "You want another drink?"

I had a feeling we were gonna be here for a while so I nodded my head. "Sure, but I can get it myself, you don't have to-"

He went and got another for me anyway. I gave him a soft smile and thanked him. Mick didn't know that I knew about his back condition. I wasn't so sure if the boys knew either. Quite possibly it had been revealed while I was lounging around the Basses' home. Although, I tried to do my part and I even made it look like I was looking for a job. I did a lot of their household chores since Mr. and Mrs. Bass worked. They seemed to be quite grateful for it and didn't put any pressure on the job search due to it. I was like a live-in maid who asked for nothing other than food, clothes, and shelter.

I knew it wouldn't be too long before they made it big. Well, not too long, at least.

I looked at the Starwood. Soon, they would be selling out shows here all on their own. That was something few if any, bands had ever done without the backing of a label. Tommy had been somewhat right. I definitely didn't hate being at the Starwood, but I wasn't sure if I loved it either.


	7. Movin' Out by Aerosmith

It didn't occur to me that both Tommy and Nikki were going to pick up girls and take them home that night. However, sure enough, there was a girl who had her face pressed up against Nikki's, mentioning something about his former band, and he was doing nothing but eagerly pressing against her.

Something awful panged through my heart.

It didn't have any right to do that.

For one, Nikki and I had literally nothing going on. And for seconds, there wasn't going to be. He was just a tease. And I was such a bore compared to the floozy clinging against him. Didn't he have a girlfriend?

I flushed at the fact I actually had just thought that. This was Nikki fucking Sixx! He wouldn't start to have an ounce of empathy for the girls he was with until far, far later. I glanced at the blonde - she was blonde, I think. I shouldn't be so mean towards her. I know I shouldn't. I'm sure she was a nice enough girl and she was allowed to have a little fun.

Trying not to focus on Nikki, I tore my eyes away and glanced at Tommy.

It didn't take much to notice that Tommy was completely drunk. Normally, I wouldn't have minded so much, but he happened to be my ride home. Home. I had been in 1981 for basically a month now and already I was beginning to think of it as home. He, too, had a girl on his arm. He also had a girlfriend. What was it with these dudes and their girlfriends never being around?

He often claimed he was in love with her - Jessica, that was, for a fact that he hadn't even bothered to hide. She could shoot her cum about five feet across the room. A squirter with immense talent. I had read it all in the book. It made it hard to get in his car - knowing that there was a chance that I was just sitting in her dried up fluids. This was a lie, of course. It wasn't just a chance. It was just pure fact by that point.

But as I said, he was my ride home and I wasn't going to ruin my experience in his car. He was...We both needed to get home somehow. I couldn't let the stupid fucker drive him and his date while he was absolutely sloshed. Imagine if for some reason he died!? And I could have prevented it? Now that would have been an even heavier weight to hold on my shoulders.

"Tommy," I barked out. I got his attention as his brown eyes whirled over at me.

"Novvaaa," He laughed out. "Novaaa, meet uh-"

"Linda," the girl smiled back. Her eyes were practically rolling inside of her head. I had no doubt she was as high as Tommy was.

"You're my ride," I emphasized.

"Oh - uh - and?" He snorted goofishly. "I didn't lose myyy keeys."

"You're not driving."

"Whaa-"

"Lemme do you a bro moment." I tried to wiggle my brows. "I'll drive."

I didn't want to phrase it like he was incapable of driving. He would take it as a challenge. I knew that for a fact.

"Duuude, you'reee greeat. Isn't shee greeat?"

Even though he was drunk, I still blushed from the compliment anyway. He swung the keys my way or attempted to at least. They fell to the ground and I had to reach down to pick them up. We had parked a little ways away from the Starwood.

Did I have my license back where I came from? Yes.

Did that make me a very good driver? Hell, no.

I could feel my hands clam up as the three of us strolled towards his car. I got into the front seat and nearly puked my guts up. I probably wasn't in the best state to be driving, either, but I still have my senses with me and every single one of them was currently telling me that this was one of the worst ideas I had ever had.

I had come from a rather small town in the future. The idea of parallel parking was a foreign concept. In fact, it was hard to comprehend that I was literally in Los Angeles - one of the most populated cities in America.

Life was different here in comparison to the rest of the United States. Life was drugs, parties, and sex. My town had been down south, in Louisiana, and had only three thousand people residing in it. There were drugs and there were parties - also sex, but the atmosphere was different. It was the sad versions of those things.

I placed the keys in the ignition as I could hear the sounds of the girl moaning as she and Tommy made out in his backseat. I turned the car on and tried my best to try and get us home. I slowly but surely made my way out of the Sunset Strip. With all of the extra time I took - I had also come to the conclusion that I had no way of knowing how to get to Tommy's house from the Sunset Strip. I hadn't paid as much attention as I should have.

"Fuck," I murmured as I kept my eyes on a road filled with endless cars. Few things looked familiar. I should've just asked Mick for a ride home. Wherever home was. Or to stay at his place or something. He was a nice guy. He would've said yes. I hope. Either way, it was too late now. There was only one place that I was sure I could get us too and I'm positive that he was currently banging a girl in that filthy closet of his.

I briefly eyed the backseat.

The clothes had come off and all I could see were a pair of jiggling tits. Tommy really hadn't bothered to wait.

"Hey, Linda?" I asked.

"H-huh?" I heard her say.

"Where do you live?"

There was a blush burning across my face. I had been blushing a lot lately. See, I was a brilliant actor around crushes but if you made me mad or embarrassed - the blood came right up into my cheeks. She told me the address. It was one of the most bizarre experiences of my life - aside from the time travel bit. That one would take the cake.

Linda, conveniently, lived right near the Sunset Strip. It wasn't hard to find her place. It was an apartment that wasn't actually that shitty. Apparently, Tommy couldn't keep it up for much longer because as soon as I pulled up I heard a loud groan and a body collapse against the seat.

"Thanks, hun for driving me to my place." Linda smiled, dazed out of her mind, as a giggle slipped through.

"No problem." My lips thinned as I tried to think of what to ask her. She was already trying to pull her clothes back on. "Hey - I can't remember the address to my buddy's place. Mind if we crash at your place for the night?"

"As long as you don't mind the dog."

Tommy murmured something as he placed his head against his hand. Linda was a doll who helped him put on his pants as we both carried him up to her apartment - where I dropped him on the couch. Linda clearly had more of her wits about her than Tommy. At least, that seemed the case.

The dog was a schnauzer and in any other case - I would have minded it, but there was still an awful jitter to my nerves. Driving in new places always put me on the verge of having a panic attack. He barked at me for a few seconds as Linda threw open her bedroom door and crashed onto its mattress. She then lifted her head up and looked at me with bleary eyes as I stood unsure in front of it. "Do you wanna share with me, hun?"

"That would be amazing, thank you."

I sat awkwardly on the bed. I soon heard her snore. I was constantly on edge. I couldn't even play on my phone. I had left it in a safe place at Tommy's house. Somehow, I managed to fall asleep, even if stiffly keeping myself away from the strange girl named Linda.

Tommy woke me up by shaking me awake. He was staring at me with confusion. Looking at Linda and then looking at me. Light streamd through the window blinds.

"Dude, I got so wasted last night." He whispered. "How did we fucking get here?"

"I-I drove us." There was a rasp to my voice as a yawn escaped me. "I didn-I didn't know how to get us to your house so I just drove us to Linda's place."

"Linda?"

I nodded at the body beside me.

"You scored?" Tommy gave a cheeky grin.

"No - no. You did. I drove both of you while you two fucked."

"You're such a bro, but let's leave now. Mom will get worried. Where did you put my keys?" I pulled them out from my pants pocket and handed them over. He took them and we left the apartment building. We got into his car and I, for once, tried my best to pay attention as to how we got to his house. The Sunset Strip in the daytime was so different. It wasn't anything like the wild nightlife where everyone got absolutely trashed. It was easy to forget that people actually worked.

However, instead of driving towards his parent's house. We drove and parked in front of Nikki's building. "What are we doing here?" I yawned, stretching my hands above my head.

"We got auditions today."

"Isn't it a little too early for that?"

"Nova, it's two in the afternoon."

I jolted in surprise. "You're joking?"

"No way, dude. I'm lucky I got up, too. Nikki would have killed me if we were late." We got out of his car after he parked it and walked up the steps. We found Nikki to be wide awake. He had everything prepared. It left me kind of in awe of him. He truly was dedicated to creating one of the best bands that the eighties had ever seen.

This was it.

This was where we met Vince.

He would drive up to Nikki's apartment with his snobby girlfriend and his fancy five-hundred-dollar pants.

Today would be the day that history was made...Or so I thought.

O'Dean was a round, chubby fellow who's voice fit the part of the not-yet-deemed Motley Crue. Unfortunately, that was about all that fit. He auditioned. He was the only one to even audition. I had to sit there and watch with widened, horrified eyes as someone who was definitely not Vince Neil got the part as their lead singer.

Mick Mars had noticed my shocked gaze before anyone else did. I had managed to hide it from both Tommy and Nikki. After the audition, he had shimmied up to me. "This one isn't gonna last, is he?"

I was in too much shock to be coherent so I dumbly nodded in subtle affirmation.

This was impossible.

I had read the book multiple times. I had even read the Heroin Diaries. I didn't remember some other guy getting the role as the singer. Maybe it had happened? I didn't always have the best memory - especially since this was before the band even began, but still. I should've been able to remember this!

It must have been something I did.

I dunno how, though.

But as I watched him interact with the band members - I wanted to do nothing but scream.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I should say - O'Dean is actually in the book. I swear he isn't some guy I created and or plopped down into the Motleyverse. I just wanted to clarify that.


	8. I Can't Get No Satisfaction by the Rolling Stones

Four days. It had been four days since O'Dean had auditioned. I had been on edge and waiting for Vince Neil to spawn and poke his blonde head into Motley Crue's business. He had yet to come and I was beginning to lose hope. Motley Crue was going to be stuck with chubby, old O'Dean forever and they wouldn't be taken to the top as they would have hoped to be.

And of course, in this hellish week filled with paranoia and a constant, heavy sense of dread, I had grown sick again. It was unlike the last time, however. It didn't seem so bad, but every so often I would get those same electric jolts up my legs and a mouth full of puke.

Even if they did notice - they were closer now than ever to having an actual, solid band. I was the least of their concerns. They had been practicing and writing songs. Several of which I had heard and even a few that I hadn't.

"Did you hear that, Nova!?" Tommy exclaimed, drawing my attention back towards the group. "We're gonna go record at a studio!"

There was a sudden wave of pain that went up my leg and straight into my stomach. I was unable to hold it back, other than throwing my hand to my mouth, keeping the puke in. I swallowed the liquid down. I knew it was a bad thing to do, but the boys were already looking at me like some sort of weirdo. To be fair, they wouldn't be wrong, but still.

"Wow...I didn't think you'd get that excited."

"Of course, I'm excited." I smiled through the intense wave of nausea. "That's- That's excellent news."

"You okay, Nova? You're not looking so hot." Tommy spoke, worried.

"I'm - I'm fine. I promise."

"Are you sick again?" He pestered me with questions that I refused to answer for fear of spewing my guts all over him.

It was then that Mick asked the question that both he and the newbie, O'Dean, had been thinking. They weren't here for the first time I had gotten sick, but unfortunately, their concern would bring attention to another issue at hand.

"Has she eaten anything?" Mick spoke up, his eyes narrowed.

"I see her eat all the time," Tommy declared. "A lot, even."

Oh god. First, no Vince Neil. Now they were focusing on the fact that I...struggled with certain things. It made me want to puke all the more. I avoided looking at Tommy and more importantly, the rest of the guys. This was not a topic I wanted to discuss, ever. It wasn't even something I had brought up to Joe. If Joe knew - he would be so disappointed, but it wasn't like I didn't keep in check. I wasn't bulimic. I didn't have an eating disorder that affected my life to such a point it was dangerous to my health. It just so happened I loved food. I loved food, a lot. It was a comfort thing. Sometimes, when I ate too much - I would puke it out via my fingers or any other extra means of help. It was no big deal.

But I knew that these guys - these future hypocrites who would drown themselves in alcohol (they basically already did) and taint their bodies with heroin - with a little bit of cocaine sprinkled on top. My issues were nothing compared to theirs.

"That's not how it always happens," Mick insisted. "I had a girlfriend who used to make herself throw up after she ate. I discovered her doing it. She had a meltdown and we broke up not long afterward."

"I eat plenty," I managed to bark out. "Leave it at that."

The damage was done. Only Tommy had seen me in this state before, but even he looked quite suspicious. The wheels were turning in that hyperactive noggin of his. Even Nikki looked at me a bit differently. These fuckers. I know Mick only meant well but my eating habits were none of his business and I was insulted that he would bring them up in front of everyone.

Of course, they ended up making a bit of a scene of it. Tommy had managed to find a slice of pizza and I know he meant well in his big heart, but...

"Tommy, I am not eating that."

"Eat it." He pushed it up into my face.

"It was on the floor. There are bugs on it."

He glanced down at the slice before he took one big bite that made my stomach churn for time-travel-unrelated reasons. "It tastes fine to me." He said as chewed. "Just a little on the chewy side."

I won the argument. I usually back down but there was no way I was eating a piece of pizza that who was who knows how old and covered in bugs. Nope. I wasn't gonna do it. We went home that day and were prepared to wake up early that morning. Most of the nights they were out partying at the Starwood - I sometimes joined them - sometimes I didn't. They had yet to manage to convince me to live a little and snort cocaine or pop molly.

Tommy made sure to watch me very carefully when I ate dinner. It didn't matter that his appetite was curbed by drugs, but it mattered that mine was apparently. It was quite irritating and it made me want to lash out every time he would stare me down like a hawk. To the point, it had raised up questions with the rest of the family. Tommy knew enough to deflect them.

We soon made our way to the studio near the Sunset Strip. It was a bit ratty - clearly meant for the starving-artist types. O'Dean was there. He stood out in comparison and his shiny, white gloves caught the sun. He insisted on them. While wearing them, however, he didn't like to touch anything. That was the ultra-annoying part. Personally, I didn't think they were that appalling but I could tell by the looks Nikki gave him that O'Dean was far from being what they had pictured as their lead.

"You have two hours to record," spoke the engineer. She was an odd-looking woman with alligator-like teeth and a horse-face, but she was nice enough.

I sat on a seat in the background. I was always sitting for some reason. There wasn't much to do, otherwise. I couldn't play an instrument. My only experience in that field was the one year I had been forced to play the clarinet in middle school by my mother. She soon realized that it was useless when I just ignored the instrument completely and didn't want to have anything to do with it.

As much as I was vibing to the music...I knew and I think they knew it too that as cool as the sound was, it wasn't Motley. Granted, they didn't even know their own band name but there is no way they were going to get anywhere with their lead singer. He had no stage presence and there were no amount of gloves that could hide that tidbit. Damn, he did have a voice though.

"Time is up, gentlemen," said the Engineer.

They looked disgruntled. I could tell they still had more they wanted to record. I saw Nikki whisper something into Tommy's ear. Tommy adorned a playful smirk as he exited the booth and made his way over the engineer. I watched Tommy's seduction skills with my very eyes.

I was beginning to notice why they had thought I was a lesbian. For some reason, I didn't fall to their feet and worship them like everyone else seem to keep doing. It was so bizarre. Women really didn't seem to have any respect for themselves around these guys. Granted, they were hella good-looking and I understood it to an extent. But this was an engineer, she had a job, she seemed to like it; so why risk it all?

It really was a different time.

That was another thing that curbed the whole Nikki and Nova romance explosion signals going off in my head. Who knows how many STD's these dudes had managed to pick up. I looked the man up and down as discreetly as I could. Goddamn, he was so handsome but I knew it was best to keep those fantasies to myself.

It took us another day in the studio.

"She has like this cool net around her bed-" Tommy kept saying, explaining his night with the music engineer. Whatever Tommy had done, he must have been good at it, because she let the boys use the studio for free until they outworn their welcome.

Oddly enough, it didn't reach that point.

The boys had finally gotten fed up with O'Dean, who had already begun to develop a bad-case of singeritus aka when singers felt like they were more important than the dudes who rocked the instruments.

"Just fucking clap, dude." Nikki sighed, pinching his nose.

"I don't want to take off my gloves, man. It ruins my image." O'Dean whined so hard it almost made me snort. His image had already been ruined for me. He was incredibly whiny and it was a level eight-point-eight out of ten on the annoying skill.

They called a break.

Mick muttered to Tommy, "I really don't like that guy."

And of course, Tommy spilled the beans to Nikki - who was glad that he wasn't the only one fed up with O'Dean. Both he and Tommy looked towards me, curiosity in their eyes. "What do you have to say about it, Nova?"

"Say about what?" O'Dean inserted himself into the conversation, looking at them with uncertain eyes.

"I don't think he's right for the band," I nodded my head and avoided eye-contact with O'Dean. Unlike Robin, however, O'Dean didn't burst into tears. Oh no, O'Dean didn't take rejection easily.

"What the fuck?" He declared loudly. "The fuck do you mean I'm not right for the band! I'm the best thing to happen to these guys." He looked at the guys - hoping his outburst had rumbled some support from at least one other guy. "Man, fuck you guys. You're gonna listen to some dumb groupie over me?"

The insult hit me like a bag of rocks. I wasn't a groupie. Groupies slept with the band members? Right? I mean...I did follow them around, but only because I had no one else. Dang. He was lowkey right. In a way, I was lowkey Motley Crue's first groupie. I didn't let that statement get to me, though. He was only half-way right.

"Shut up, you asshole." Tommy defended my honor, making me smile in the process. Although, my smile quickly dropped when they began to swing fists. It was technically four against one, although only Tommy and Nikki joined in hammering their fists down on O'Dean's face. I liked to think it was the fact that they had put up with his prissy-ness for nearly a week.

By the end of it, we had all been kicked out of the studio, but Nikki had proudly held up the white gloves he had stolen off of O'Dean and had every intention of setting them on fire when we got back to his apartment.

"I knew he wasn't the one," Mick hummed.

"You sure did," I agreed. "First day and everything."

There was a new problem, however. Now the band was without a singer.

"What we need is a guy that looks like David Lee Roth but with a vibe like fucking Bowie." Nikki declared as we settled down around in the apartment hours later. We were resting by a puddle of roasted, crinkly gloves that Nikki had tried to torch into oblivion.

"So we need some skinny, blonde fucker with moves?" Mick stated and as he did - it was like watching fireworks go off inside Tommy's head.

His eyes widened as he shouted, "Holy shit! I think I know our guy, dudes."


	9. My Kinda Lover by Billy Squier

There was the sound of music blasting throughout the backyard of some rich person's house. Things were finally starting to turn around and the scenery we were in looked awfully familiar. I was beginning to realize that things were different in the past - different in ways they shouldn't be. I remember the scene in this movie, but the movies weren't always true. Especially not with the Dirt. Not that it mattered too much - it captured the feel of Motley Crue in a way that no other biopic had really done.

The not-yet Crue looked out of place amongst the kids who had grown up in the suburbs and likely had yet to leave. There was Nikki - in his poofed-up, black hair - and of course, the leather. He had yet to spray-paint his face in make-up. I knew that would be coming soon. Then, of course, there was Mick who was clearly older than everyone else present. He came off even freakier than Nikki and that was hard to do. There were only two of us that were capable of blending in.

There was Tommy, despite his new mane of black hair, who seemed to fit in due to his energetic nature, the constant smile, and the willingness to talk to just about anyone. And of course, there was me. I wore darker colors, but I didn't live in leather or the color black. It was easy to tell that I was with them though because my hair was a shade that a lot of people had never even seen before.

It had taken me at least an hour to brush it all out and already it was beginning to lighten up, which was a shame because I had kept it this color for nearly three years. I had kept my eyebrows dark through all that time - through the use of dye, of course, but I had been relying on Nikki's supply without him knowing.

All three of them were wearing sunglasses likely because they had gotten smashed the night before - as they did every night. The sounds of "My Kinda Lover" echoed through the yard. It took all I had to not bop my head to it. There was just something about Vince singing it that made it so much better, not to shade on the original. It was a shame that they hadn't put it on the sound-track.

"A fucking cover band?" Mick snorted as he stared at the crowd in distaste.

"Yeah, but I'm telling you, I went to high school with this dude." Tommy defended himself as they went closer and closer to the crowd, getting a good look at Vince. I clung to them like a kid clinging to their parents, like a monkey to their favorite tree. I couldn't help it. They were all I knew in '81. Plus, I was currently trying not to pass out on the spot. I had thought that it was definitely only the book that whatever the hell was going on was working from. I had clearly been wrong.

Because this was not how they met Vince.

I hadn't expected O'Dean, but I knew enough to know that in the books - Tommy had ways of contacting Vince. Vince just hadn't bothered contacting back for the longest time. This was not how it happened. I briefly pondered if people could see me on their television screens at home? It also stirred some other questions.

Did I appear in the books?

If so - what the fuck! Because I still existed in the future. People would know that it was me. There was a sudden pulse to my brain as a headache began to ensue. I exhaled softly. I tried to focus back on the music.

"Okay. That is exactly who we need." Tommy re-iterated.

"His voice ain't bad," Mick begrudgingly admitted.

Nikki was in complete awe. As I glanced at him, I could see his eyes glistening. I could see the future possibilities racing through his head. This was his band. He knew it. I knew it. "I don't care if he can sing," he stated. "Just look at what he's doing to those chicks."

There was a crowd of girls who were swaying their hands. A few of them even screamed and cheered when he reached down to smirk at them. I didn't realize that I, too, had started swaying to the music. As if by cue, all three of the guys turned their heads.

"Woah, not even Nova is immune." Tommy pointed out. I abruptly froze and stopped somewhat dancing.

"He's a-a good singer," I retorted defensively. Mrs. Bass had finally gone out of her way and had bought me an entirely new outfit. That now had me up to three. I thanked her profusely, of course, but she was simply too kind. It was one of those ugly, bowling alley shirts with the sleeves that were wide and ended at the elbow. It clung to me loosely and was covered in mix-matched colors of purple, yellow, black, and even some blue. I had fallen in love with it the moment I had laid my eyes on it.

I was also wearing a pair of high-waisted shorts and a pair of Athena's converses. They were colored in purple, which was my second favorite color after blue. Unlike the guys, I hadn't even bothered with getting a pair of sunglasses.

"Woooo! Thank you! We're Rock Candy!" Vince exclaimed as the song ended, pumping a fist into the air as he jumped off the stage. He jogged over to get a beer and the four us watched him.

"Shitty name," Mick murmured.

"He's fucking perfect, man." Tommy grinned.

"He's pretty good." Nikki wasn't as openly enthusiastic but I knew for a fact that he was imagining how Vince's voice would sound with their songs.

"Got moves." Mick agreed, but I could see him wince. We had been standing upright for quite some time. There was nothing to lean down against behind us.

Tommy finally got the balls to bounce up to him as he was talking to this blonde chick. The same snobby blonde chick that I had expected him to bounce up with earlier. It really was fucking freaky. She looked the same as she did in the movie, but all of the guys looked as they had in real life.

"Would you get a load of this blonde-haired bitch!" There was a pause in Vince's eyes as he tried to remember who exactly had interrupted him, but then his eyes lit up.

"Tommy, damn!"

"Come here, fucker!" Tommy opened up his arms as the two of them bro-hugged.

"It's so good to see you, man."

We felt so awkward watching it. Well, at least I did. Vince was a complete stranger. It was easier to be myself with the guys who knew that I was from a different time. It felt like I didn't have to watch what I said so much, even though I still did. God knows how many times it seemed like the boys wanted to beg me for answers.

It was odd how Nikki was so distant sometimes, considering he was the one who summoned me. He had asked a question. Right? A question he hadn't even bothered to ask me in person. It was bizarre and it led me to believe that it wasn't it. His question may have been part of it, but it wasn't the full thing. I had yet to crack and demand an explanation. I didn't want my face to get punched in. I knew Nikki was more than capable of doing it.

"I'm in a band now, man!" Tommy jerked a thumb over at us. "With those guys right there. Dude, we watched you kill it today! You've gotta come jam with us!"

"Man, I can't. I got something going on." Vince weakly responded as he looked over at the girl beside him. She was tapping her nails on the table and getting quite impatient.

"Come on, dude. Just listen to this! My number's on the front. Give us a call." Tommy clapped him on the back and marched proudly back to us.

"I think he's in, dudes."

I knew how this went down. Vince was definitely not in at that moment, but it was nice to know Tommy's confidence was as big and strong as ever. We booked it out of the stupid suburban party as fast as we could. We went back to Nikki's place.

This time, however, there was a bit of a surprise waiting for us.

Well, for me.

Nikki's girlfriend had come back home. She was an average looking chick with dyed black hair. She looked exactly like what I thought Nikki would really be into. She was currently spray-painting a demonic sigil on some poster-board.

"Hey, babe." She smirked upon seeing us. I don't think she expected to see me, though, because we made eye contact that felt like forever. I wanted to dunk myself into the trash can out front. I almost wanted to say, "Sorry sis, but I have a teensy-weensy crush on your boyfriend."

I didn't say that though because I'm not an idiot.

It had been a while since I had seen her. A few weeks at least. Apparently this is the first time that Mick had seen her as well. Nikki's relationships were just weird like that. His girlfriends could disappear for weeks at a time and he didn't seem the slightest bit bothered. Probably because, in his words, they were just another way to masturbate.

"How goes it?" I asked with a wide, phony smile.

She turned her head and seemed to be briefly confused by how I had worded my statement, but she didn't ask questions. I liked that. I guess that's why Nikki liked her too.

"Not bad," she finally answered. "I'm just drawing some stuff for my band then I have to go."

"So soon?" I couldn't even tell if Nikki meant it. It wasn't like he hadn't had a flood of pussy since she had been away. To be fair, she owned the apartment. She could kick him out at any time.

This was the girl that Nikki had done the ritual with. I was tempted to ask if she knew what would happen, but the words were unable to come out. I'm not even sure if I wanted to know.

"Yeah-"

They gave each other a lust-filled kiss that I wanted to avert my eyes from. I couldn't because I'm sick like that. I finally managed to move and follow the rest of the boys into the apartment. Tommy passed me a beer. I didn't even like beer but that didn't stop me from popping it open to take a swig. I had started drinking a lot more since the Crue had basically adopted me.

Nikki, in the end, convinced her to stay for a few hours longer.

And by that - I mean they banged in the closet while we sat around, awkwardly talking. Tommy managed to convince me to show off my music collection. I kept their eyes carefully away from the Motley Crue part of it.

"It can play songs and everything, dude. It really must have cost you a fortune, Nova."

I flushed and ran my fingers through my hair, "Uhhh, yeah. I kind of um...Pirated it all."

"You stole it?" Tommy declared, but he wasn't angry. "Dude, that's so badass. You just keep getting better and better."

He hadn't yet realized just how much work was put into music and how very little they would get paid in the 2010s in comparison to the 80s.

"Can we agree on Aerosmith?" I asked, flicking between songs.

"Do they ever get good again?" Tommy groaned.

"Uh, for an album or two." I snorted. "But they just lose it. That's okay, though. Not everyone can last forever." I tried my best not to put too much emphasis on that. I had a feeling Mick Mars caught it anyway.

"Dude, we will. I know we will."

Tommy always seemed to forget that he was talking to a fucking time traveler. He had such blind faith and hope that they would be absolute legends. His loyalty to a band that hadn't even started was something else to see. He was such a Hufflepuff...And I was such a nerd.

We went home not long afterward. I drove, of course. License or not. Tommy didn't seem to mind it, though and had gladly been trying to teach me to drive as though I didn't already know. It was a bit insulting but mostly sweet. The next day should have been a lot more exciting than it was, except, Vince didn't show up.

We waited for at least two weeks before Tommy called Vince up and for some reason, he finally agreed. Tommy told us that Vince had lost his number. I knew the truth, though. I'm surprised Tommy hadn't seen through it, but Tommy was the type of guy to ignore any stuff like that. He preferred living in that sort of ignorance. I couldn't blame him.

They were re-hearsing "Live Wire". It was weird to just hear the instrumentals. For a few moments, I had become my mom and I had decided that the time was now that someone had to clean at least a little bit. I had grown tired of sitting around about a hundred beer bottles and had done my best to put them all in a bag. I was almost done when we heard a car drive up. We were all drinking some form of alcoholic beverage.

We all looked out the window.

A woman got out and I could tell by the way she walked that she would be an uppity bitch. But also, I had seen the movie so I was probably a bit biased.

"Who's the chick?" Nikki asked, looking down from the window.

"Which one?" Mick remarked and I couldn't hide my snort.

Vince got out of the car. He was dressed in basically all white and his hair surrounded his face like some sort of halo. What was with our lead singers and the color white? Our...To think, I really was beginning to think of myself as apart of the band.

She took one look at us and I could feel judgment coming out of her eyes. "I don't think these guys will be good for you, baby," she cooed, running her hands through Vince's hair. "Or their groupie." She added unnecessarily, pointing her face at me.

Groupie! What the fuck! What was it with people calling me a groupie? I pouted and crossed my arms. I didn't even bother defending myself. Lovey wasn't going to last anyway. Lovey was the nickname that the guys would give her as soon as she and Vince left. They said it had to so with some book or whatever. I had never read it and it was a reference that flew over my head. But I did know that the name suited her perfectly.

"Here are the lyrics," Nikki passed over a sheet.

Vince took it and stood in front of the microphone.

"Plug me in-" Vince began to sing.

I could see Lovey shake her head in disgust as she waved her hands. "This music is way too heavy for you, baby."

They stopped for a few brief moments to go over it. "Hit this note here," Nikki pointed out and then he jerked his head over to Lovey. "And muzzle that!"

"Fuck you, asshole. He doesn't tell me what to do-"

They began to play. They played even harder than the first time. It was like magic, fireworks going off in everyone's head. Even Lovey could see it. These guys - when they moved - it was electric. They had made one of their classic songs within minutes. I think I almost cried. In those few moments of playing, there was no memory of stupid, glove-wearing O'Dean. This was something different. This was something better. This was Motley fucking Crue.


	10. Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) by Motley Crue Pt. 1

I had been in 1981 for about two and a half months now. To be honest with you, I didn't think things would change so much once the Crue actually became the Crue. The moment we had discovered Vince was the moment it basically all went to hell for me. It had been legendary, iconic, yet disastrous the moment we had stayed up drinking and cheering and jamming out to songs that would be sung for decades (and some that wouldn't).

They had discovered their name. Mick Mars had been saving that name for too many years now and it was only too fitting for Motley Crue. There could never be a better name. When Nikki had suggested that they call the band Christmas - not even I hid my laughter. Of course, Tommy's childish suggestion of "the Fourskins" had gotten to me as well. Or maybe it was just the alcohol?

Not only had they discovered their band - it seemed like they had begun to discover themselves as well. It didn't take long for Nikki to actually get a job, surprisingly, at the Starwood itself. But because he had a job and Tommy was basically willing to do anything for money, he soon left the witchy chick he had been with. I doubt she had even noticed. Nikki had packed up his stuff and had found an equally crummy apartment on the other part of the Sunset Strip, closer to the Starwood than ever before.

It was a bit bigger though.

For example, there were two bedrooms. One was a bit bigger. Nikki had claimed that for himself but had agreed to rotate every other month or so. He was a liar like that because of course, it didn't happen. Unfortunately for me, I had been pulled from Tommy's parent's home and into the crummy apartment with them.

I still don't know how or why I got dragged into that.

Much less how Nikki even agreed to it.

For as long as I had known him, which wasn't very long, Nikki and I were not friends. Nikki was good friends with Tommy and had summoned me from the future. That was as close as it got. Sometimes we had what I thought were moments, but I knew it was all in my head. The teasing, the being-a-dick-to-be-attractive, Nikki did that with everyone. The only reason I hadn't been set aside like yesterday's breakfast was because, in a way, Nikki considered me to be his responsibility. Granted, that was in a very small way.

But as I said - it went to hell for me soon enough.

A few weeks before their first shows, they had all come in as some sort of intervention and had surrounded me like vultures. There had been nothing I could do when they tore off my shoes and replaced them with black heels. I had been confused for the most part. Nikki had thrown me a tube top but had so graciously let me use the bathroom to change rather than right out in the living room.

"If you're gonna live with us. You have to look like us. We can't have some nerd-girl ruining our image." Nikki had stated callously. It had come off as so cruel and it was perhaps the cruelest thing he had ever said to me.

But he had been right.

I would be ruining their image.

So I adorned the fishnets and delicately placed the sweater away somewhere. They had gotten me a sparkly tube-top that was black-and-white. Nikki had claimed that he stole it from one of his girlfriends, just for me. There was also a mini-skirt. I had to shut my eyes while I put it on. I had never, ever worn a mini-skirt. There was so much revealed skin. It just wasn't my thing.

"You assholes should at least let me borrow one of your jackets."

"Just come out and show us, nerd-girl." Nikki laughed out from behind the door. In my hands was a pair of earrings that they had also managed to get me. It seemed as though they had conjured up this whole plan that even Mick had been apart of.

I looked at him with betrayal when I came out of the disgusting bathroom. He avoided my eyes as the boys whistled and hooted. I felt my face burn dramatically as I tried to cover myself with arms. I felt so exposed.

"The earrings?" Nikki looked down at my hands.

"My ears aren't pierced," I admitted - this admission ending up being one of my many mistakes. I should've said I was allergic to metal or something. Nikki took my answer as an invitation to let him pierce my ears.

"You'll be fine! See, I did it!" Tommy showed his newly pierced ear as they sat me down on the filthy leather couch. I leaned away from Nikki - who was looking all too happy with the giant-fucking needle that he had pulled out of nowhere.

"Awww, do you need someone to hold your hand?" Nikki mocked as he got closer. I kicked at him out of instinct. I had forgotten I was wearing heels so it actually hurt him when the heel caught onto his leg. "Fuck, Nova. Just lemme stick this thing in your ear."

I looked at Tommy with stress-filled eyes. "Holding someone's hand would be nice," I declared. He had hopped onto the arm of the couch and held my hand tightly. I squeezed it hard.

There were a few seconds of silence but I felt the metal touch the lobe and let out a small squeal.

"I haven't even poked through, yet!" Nikki stated. "When I count to three - I'll do it, okay."

He seemed softer that time so I felt myself relax.

I should have known.

"One-" they all said together.

"Two-"

"Thr-" A stinging pain filled my ear as I yelped and squeezed Tommy's hand harder than I had ever squeezed it before.

"Motherfucker, you said you would count to three!" I shrieked, holding my ear.

Nikki smirked, mischief in his green eyes. "I lied."

He then stuffed a white lightning bolt earring into the one ear and looked back to admire the work. I glared at him. Tommy hissed from the side before finally pulling his hand away. He then looked at me and gave me a lop-sided smile. "Wow, you actually look kind of hot."

"Not bad, kid." Mick nodded his head.

Apart of me wanted to blush, but inside, I was infuriated. How dare they! I could handle the clothes - despite the fact I hated showing most of my skin - especially around the stomach area. They could force me to wear heels, which I would burn as soon as I was able. But piercing my ear? That was too far.

There was no such thing as too far with Motley Crue, though. Not even at the beginning.

My anger at them soon faded. I could never stay mad at them for some reason.

It was kind of fun getting to watch two boys struggle their way in heels as they had to walk back and forth across the room countless of times. The only one who knew how to walk in heels at the beginning were Mick and Nikki. They had experience in both of those things, having come from multiple bands before-hand.

"Our image is everything," Nikki had said. "We need to nail this."

Of course, it would have been even funnier had I not been forced to join them. I winced as the shoes pressed painfully against the bottom of my feet. I struggled to walk in them just as much as Vince and Tommy did.

"It's only a few extra inches above the ground."

"A few extra inches is a big deal." I spat out, both Tommy and Vince nodded along. "Especially on these twigs."

"You're a girl. You're supposed to be able to walk on heels."

"Fuck you, Nikki."

I clenched my fist and glared hard at Nikki - who gave it back just as much. "If you don't like it, you can leave."

It was infuriating to admit that as we argued - I only saw him. Everything else seemed to fade into the background. There were tingles running up and down my body. I'm surprised it wasn't as obvious to everyone else as it was to me.

"I would leave," I stated. "If not for the fact that you fucking brought me here, with your stupid fucking ritual. I didn't ask to be here, Nikki."

The other three watched us silently. Vince did so with a bit more confusion. Tommy seemed sadder than anything. They watched as I kicked off the stupid stilettos, grabbed my converse, and walked out the door. I wiped tears out of my eyes as I did so. God, I was such a baby.

None of them walked out after me. Not even Tommy. I dunno why I even thought they would. I was on the backburner now. I looked down at the Sunset Strip. I placed a finger at my ear and pulled my fingers back - they were covered in red. With my luck, I probably had some sort of disease because there was no way that the needle had been sterile. Nothing was clean in that house.

But there was no way I was going back in.

Not tonight.

In the end, I knew I couldn't stay away forever.

Any and all directions I had memorized were different now. We lived on a different part of the Sunset Strip. It threw my memory into a fizzy. Not that I could think of much with how heavy my heart weighed. But as I walked, somehow managing to put on my shoes, I found that there were some familiar parts.

I saw Nikki's old apartment.

I saw road signs and street names and hundreds of people.

More importantly, I saw Linda.

Well, I saw her apartment. It was a long-shot but I crossed the street, walked up those steps, and I knocked. I heard the sound of the dog barking as the bleary-eyed girl opened the door. Her face was caked full of make-up that had been smudged. She had clearly just gotten up.

"Hey," I said. "I know this is a longshot, but I can stay here for the night?"

Honestly, I don't even know why she bothered letting me in. I had known her for three minutes, basically. She had let me sleep in her apartment once but that was it. We hadn't spoken. We didn't even know each other.

"Those assholes," she spoke softly as she looked at my ear. "I can't believe you've never pierced your ear before."

"Really?" I snorted.

"Yeah. I did it when I was fourteen, at summer camp. My mom was furious." She told me as she ran a paper towel over the sore wound. She had a small bottle of alcohol. "This is gonna hurt just a little bit." She dabbed the paper towel into the bottle before rubbing and wiping off the bacteria from my ear.

It stung - badly - and I hissed as I clenched my hand over the arm of a kitchen chair.

"Sorry," she said apologetically.

"You're good," I assured her.

"They were right, though." She said. "You do look hot."

She winked at me and I felt a blush almost breach the surface. I squashed it down as my lips thinned and my face froze. Not even Nikki having seen my nudes had caused that reaction. I think maybe it was because I had been slightly tipsy and now I was completely sober.

"I think you just have one of those faces, you know."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, like, you can kind of suit most looks. You were still cute when you looked like a dork."

I blanched at the hidden insult. She meant well. Linda was already one of the nicest people I had ever met. She just liked to party. She was better at reading the room though and quickly apologized. "I just speak without thinking sometimes."

"It's okay," I said. I had just been through a lot worse. I mean - only a few hours ago did I just get told that I essentially wasn't good enough. They had poked through one of my ears...They still had most of my clothes, other than my shoes.

"Do you want me to poke through the other one for you?"

"I-"

"Here," she placed a fruity alcoholic drink in front of me. "Drink some and then I'll do it. It feels better when you're drunk. Trust me."

Linda told me more about herself and I listened quietly. She had one of those nice speaking voices that you could just listen to for hours on end. She became more than just one of Tommy's hookups. Within the span of a few hours - She was beginning to look more and more like a friend.

Her dog had been asleep when I had first arrived but I had woken him up when I yelped as she pushed the needle through my other ear. It wasn't as painful as the first time. Linda had been right about the alcohol. It was also likely because she had done it with careful precision, rather than pure aggression as Nikki had done.

Her hands were heavy as they had leaned against my shoulder, for better balance. It had been a long time since anyone had actually touched me. In my old life - because that's what it was now - I had something of a touch phobia. It had been like that my whole life and there was no reason for it. It was something I had been working through before I got up and dropped into the past.

But there were some rare times that even I craved for physical affection.

Not sex.

As prudish as the guys thought I was - I thought of sex probably just as much as they did.

But it was the intimate comfort a human touch could provide. Just the warmth and knowing that there was someone there. It was nice, sometimes. I remember there were times where I had gone up to my mother and had tried to hug her or something. She would just look at me and would tell me to stop being weird.

I suppose it was weird.

Those few short seconds of Linda touching me had me almost in tears. In fact, a few slipped by, but I blamed those on the fact my ears were sore and bleeding.

Later in the night, I realized that I had left my phone in my purse at Nikki's house. I only praised every diety that I could think of when I remembered that I had finally put a lock on it. It was a pass-code and unless they could guess my old highschool lunch number then those morons were out of luck.

My hand itched without it though.

And if I woke up in the middle of the night, moving my arm erratically in a desperate attempt to grasp for my phone, Linda didn't mind. She slept like a log. She had let me borrow one of her night-gowns and in doing so - really exposed of just how hard I had hit the motherlode. There were three facts I could give about what I discovered that night.

One, Linda was a nice person.

Two, Linda was a nice, rich person.

Three, Linda was a nice, rich person who also liked to kiss girls as much as she did guys.


	11. Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away) by Motley Crue Pt. 2

My lips were still tingling.

I licked over them - tasting the lip-stick and the alcohol that had been rubbed off. Linda was giggling enthusiastically as she slung her arms over my neck. This was my second night at her place and had it not been for the constant entertainment - I would have likely caved and made my way back to Nikki's apartment.

For some reason and I have no idea why - I was being stubborn about it. I had spent months with Motley Crue: with Nikki Sixx, with Tommy. I think it had rubbed off on me. I drank with ease, now. I didn't even think about the consequences of me driving even slightly intoxicated. I always told myself it was safe. I was only tipsy. Not drunk, but even I was beginning to doubt my judgment on that.

Maybe I was just afraid to say that I had given in? That I had given into a life of recklessness? Even now, it made me want to shut my eyes, tilt a bottle back, and not think. Linda had just returned from the club: Starwood. It was one of her favorites.

"You know," she said. "I saw those douchebags there."

I didn't even want to think about them. It was too late though. My heart throbbed painfully. I missed them. They probably weren't even thinking about me anymore. I know I wouldn't be.

She slammed her lips against mine once more. I didn't know what to do. She was drunk and kissing me and that was...That was a no-no in the modern-day. I had never kissed anyone before. To think - it was now - at eighteen that I finally had my first kiss and it was with someone who would probably be the same age as my grandma when I returned to my time.

If I returned to my times.

She stopped kissing me, let out another laugh, and then ducked down into her purse. She jiggled the bag enthusiastically. "Guess what I got!" She exclaimed.

Cocaine. Blow. Yayo.

Apparently, anyone who had money preferred to spend their time partying and snorting cocaine off of tables. Linda certainly seemed to enjoy it. I don't even know what it was about her that put me at ease. I think it was because I forcing myself to not think - to just act now. I didn't want to miss Tommy. I didn't want to miss Mick and I most certainly didn't want to miss Nikki Sixx.

She handed over a rolled-up dollar bill. I stared at it tentatively and my hands shook as I pressed it against the white line of dust. I looked at her as she encouraged me to sniff hard. I inhaled it quickly. There was a tight pinch to my nose as I sputtered, my hand clasping to my nose. It stung.

I had lost my cocaine virginity over my real virginity.

I wasn't quite sure how to feel about that.

At first, I didn't think anything was happening. That ended soon enough before a large smile appeared on my face and I felt energized. It was the first time I had ever been high before. Linda kissed me in response: again, again, and again. I think she wanted to have sex, but as high as I was - it wasn't that sort of high.

"Stop," I murmured. "Stop."

She pulled back - her eyes glazed over. "Why?"

"I don't know," I whispered. "I just- I don't."

I didn't want to lose my virginity while I was high. I wanted it to be special because it did mean something to me - to be able to trust someone like that. I had never let anyone see me completely naked before. Ever.

Linda did eventually stop.

My lips kept tinging though.

I pressed my fingers against them.

The day after - she apologized but kissed me again. It left my mind in confusion. I remained quite stoic, but nearly half of me wanted to burst out into giggles. I had never met someone so openly interested in me. Mick saw me as a kid. Tommy saw me as more of a sister. It was clear that to Nikki - I was just extra baggage.

Linda understood better than the guys did.

When I ate food, when I ate too much of it, and when I puked my guts into the bathroom. She simply held my hair. It was nice to not feel judged. Tommy had been especially concerned and I could even see that I had gained a few pounds simply due to lack of access towards a bathroom. Linda didn't eat much either. She was usually high and that seemed to curb her appetite.

By day four, Linda knew that I was different. She had pestered me and pestered me. Eventually, I had to build myself up a throne of pure lies.

"I'm from Canada," I said. "I got smuggled in. I don't any I.D. or proof of existence."

It turns out Linda knew a guy who knew a guy who knew all about fake I.D.'s and fake papers. It cost a fortune to get them. We decided that a fake I.D. would be better than the papers. I had to convince her that it wasn't a good idea to get me both at the same time. Mostly because I would feel way too indebted to her. She truly was a nice person.

By the time I had gotten the I.D. - picture and everything - six days had passed since I had last seen the guys - my guys. My heart ached daily. I had only snorted cocaine with Linda twice since then. I didn't want to - I didn't want to get too dependent on it. It felt good, but for how long? I had to keep chanting those words over and over and over again.

Linda was fascinated with the fact that I was from Canada. She had never been. Neither have I but she didn't need to know that. I told her I was from Prince Edward Island, from a small town called Avonlea. I ended up being very lucky that she didn't read much or else she would have called me out within seconds.

I told her stories of the cherry blossom trees, of the guy who used to tease me in middle school, and of my foster mom: Marilla. None of these were true incidences. At all. All she had to do was open one book of Anne of Green Gables and she would know that I was nothing but a liar. But my stories were far more believable than the fact that I was from the twenty-first century.

"But why Los Angeles?" She had asked. "Why not New York City?"

I had to shake my head sadly and explained that New Yorkers were very racist towards Canadians. So I came to the next best place. Linda ate it up. She had been to New York only twice before. She was the daughter of a famous painter from Los Angeles whose name I didn't recognize. He made a lot of money and then he died. She had inherited it all.

During my time with Linda, I had told her of my former friend's concerns. How to walk in heels and how to dress like I was someone that was actually cool. Linda would make me practice doing make-up on both her and myself. I was awful at it, but she seemed pretty cool about it. My hands always shook when applying eye-liner and it was the worst. She would dress me in short dresses and make me pose. She would even correct my walk.

It was like something out of a movie.

She and I went shopping on Saturday. I hadn't even realized the day of the week. A full week had passed since I had split off from my friends. At first, everything was normal. We went shopping, we bought some clothes, but then...I kept noticing the signs. There posters of a badly drawn stick figure with blue-colored hair. They were on every pole that we passed on the Sunset Strip.

"If found: please return to-" It listed to addresses. Nikki's apartment, our apartment, or Mr. and Mrs. Bass's house. It even had phone numbers. It became sickeningly clear that these posters were meant for me.

I hadn't even thought of the Basses. I wanted to beat myself in with a stick. Knowing Tommy, he had had probably expected me to go to them first. Hell! I knew myself and it would have been the first thing I had done if I could remember how to get there. Looking at those posters, with the badly drawn versions of me, it made me want to bawl my eyes out.

Tommy cared.

How could I convince myself otherwise?

"Why did you stop?" Linda looked at me, confused. Our hands were full of bags. "Oh," she said, reading the poster.

A tear slid down my cheek. What the hell was I doing? I was with some strange girl, as nice as she may be. I was snorting cocaine every other day. My god if Joe could see me now. He would be the one beating me into the ground.

The sun was setting over the Sunset Strip.

"Linda...I have to go," I said. "I just want to thank you for everything."

Linda smiled sadly, her arms weakly clutching at the bags. She gave me a tight hug that was warmer than it should have been. In fact, this was sadder than it should have been. She passed over the bags. "Visit me, sometimes," she murmured. "It's been a while since I've had a good friend."

I carried the bags and I practically ran I was walking so fast. I saw his apartment. I had walked there a dozen times before. I ran up those steps. I placed the bags down and twisted at the knob, my stomach clenched anxiously.

Twisted the knob, I soon realized that it was locked. I looked anywhere for a spare key. Nikki had one made because Tommy had accidentally locked himself out once. It was under the mat - a mat that had been blackened before it could ever dare hang around the apartment. I felt the key and got it out before twisting it into the door and letting myself into the apartment.

It was empty.

I had a feeling I knew where they were. I always knew where they were. I could've found them if I wanted to. The Starwood was their favorite place to hang out at. I looked around the living room for my phone. I found my purse, but no phone.

"Damn it," I whispered. I'd been missing it.

I wanted to dash right out of the apartment and into the Starwood. I wanted to find Tommy and I wanted to jump on his bag and cling tightly and let him know just how much I had missed him. But I looked at the bags I carried. Maybe they would be less mad if I showed them how much I had improved?

Thanks to Linda - I now had two pairs of heels, another pair of converse, along with the ones I was wearing. I now managed a total of six outfits. Two of them were meant for party occasions. Linda had been wanting me to go to the clubs with her eventually.

It was an electric blue dress. It left one shoulder bare and the other one wrapped completely up. I wore that with fishnets. I kept the converse on. My skills with heels could come later. I pulled up a small pony tail of my hair and let it fall down towards the back. I had the white lightning bolt earing that Nikki had given me into one ear. I had to admit. I thought I looked good. Granted, it was difficult to tell because of the layers of shit caked up on the bathroom mirror.

I did my best to cover my eyes with eye-liner. It looked...It looked properly 80s. Linda would have been proud. I loaded myself down with mascara and similarly colored blue eye-shadow. I put a light pink shade of lipstick on my lips. Linda had also bought me some make-up. Not a lot, but just enough. It was more than what I normally did. I never, ever usually dressed to impress. The boys had never seen me put in so much effort before. I hope they didn't get used to me looking like an actual, fucking girl.

Special occasions only, dammit.

A tiny, tiny, tiny part of me actually liked it.

It had taken me about an hour to do it so it was basically completely dark when I walked outside at seven at night. I had made sure to bring my phone and my I.D. The both of them stuffed into my bra. There was a bit of wait at the Starwood. Nikki had always gotten us into there early, mostly because he worked there. I had to be a normal person now and wait for my turn.

It took about twenty minutes and I finally came face-to-face with the second guy to ever see my tits in 1981. I smiled as I dug my I.D. out of my bra and handed it over to him. He briefly looked at it and then handed it back, letting me in. When I walked in - there was a sudden wave of anxiety that washed over me. My newly-found confidence withered into a husk and I was faced with an awfully concerning question: what if they didn't want me anymore?

The reasonable side of me argued that they would've taken the posters down, yet they hadn't. I tried to repeat that side to myself, but my legs still shook as I moved through the bodies of people. I saw a tall mass of thick, black hair. So, not Mick. It could've been either Tommy or Nikki. As I pushed forward, I could see the heels and the leather and I bet if he turned around - I would see a face full of make-up as well.

I ducked behind a person as the black mass of hair moved to look my way. I couldn't see his face. I wasn't sure I wanted to. I saw the figure move towards an area. I did my best to push past more and more people as I tried to follow behind. I knew where he was headed - if it even was him. We always sat at the table near the end.

As I breached past the last layer of the crowd...There they were. All of them were laughing and having a good time. It was like the music was falling on deaf ears. I made sure to not stand out too much. I ducked into a seat with some guy in it and exhaled. He looked at me strangely but didn't really say anything. I was grateful for that.

I saw both Tommy and Nikki, even Vince, leave the booth to join back into the crowd. I then made my move and maneuvered myself back out of the seat before walking directly to where Mick sat. He had a thing of vodka in his hands. He was taking a swig of it when we made direct eye contact. I watched one of the coolest men I had ever known choke the alcohol down as he weakly stood up to greet me.

He didn't need to bother because I was already at the table and I sat in it, opposite of him. I avoided looking into his eyes. "So I've heard the guys have been looking for me," I stated softly, still unable to make his gaze.

"Yeah," he said.

"I-" I tried to start.

"You shouldn't have listened to Nikki. He was just being a fucking punk. You've been around since the beginning. You've earned your place with us - heels or not." Mick stressed his words.

It took a few quick nods for me to respond. "I know that now."

"How did you even-"

A warm body crashed into mine before Mick could finish his statement. Tommy hadn't hesitated as he wrapped his arms around me. I sniffed - he had clearly not worried about that extra layer of deodorant.

"I knew I saw you!" He declared. "I fucking knew it, man!"

There was something in the way he said them. As if he was so close to crying. It made me want to cry with him, but I didn't want to look like a fucking pussy. He pulled back and looked at me directly in my eyes and sure enough if there was a glossiness to them.

"We thought you were a goner." Tommy sniffed, but like me, he didn't cry. "I looked for you the moment I realized you weren't coming back. And when I called Mom and she hadn't seen you either. I mean - I freaked out man. You're not from here. I thought maybe the government had kidnapped you or that you have been murdered-" He went from sad to angry within seconds.

"How dare you come back into Starwood - looking like - looking like that and sit there talking to Mick as if you haven't been gone for a fucking week. Where the hell did you even go, dude? I'm talking we searched alleyways and you were just gone. Hell, Nikki thought you went back to your own time somehow. That would've been horrible, man." He continued to ramble on and on and on. He even wagged a finger in my face about the dangers of traveling on my own before Mick put a stop to it.

"Drummer," he stated. "Let her speak."

"I'm so sorry, Tommy. I missed you a lot too." I hugged him tightly, body odor or not. "I-I found someone who took me in. You remember that girl you hooked up with?"

"No..." He admitted with sad eyes.

"Well - I went to her place and she let me stay with her for a while. She even got me an I.D. man. It was a wild time."

"Why didn't you come back sooner? We wouldn't have cared. Well, I would've punched Nikki if you really wanted me too."

I flexed my fingers out on the table. "I...I didn't see the posters until today and when I did I ran all the way to Nikki's apartment but you were all gone and so I - I got ready and came here. You look amazing, by the way."

He had red lipstick on and eyeliner caked around his eyes. He was very handsome. I was more shocked that I hadn't fallen for him versus Nikki. No, I had a much too large crush on Nikki. Tommy would have never been stable, but he would have been lovable. Nikki was a dick through-and-through and he wouldn't be anything but until he died...twice.

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Miss Delacroix." Tommy sniffed. "Although, it is appreciated. I'm glad you saw the posters though. Nikki and I put them up everywhere about three days ago. Mick and I hand-drew them."

"It was mostly Drummer," Mick claimed softly.

"I didn't think you'd be back." I looked up, towards the man I had lowkey been waiting to see. I felt my mouth literally water and my body heat up a few degrees just by looking at him. He had eye-liner on, lip-stick. His hair had been hairsprayed to oblivion and back and a neat strip of it laid over his eyes. God, Nikki was fucking gorgeous.

"Well, I am. So." I barked out coldly. It even shocked me as to how mean I sounded.

"How are you not dead by some dumpster?" Nikki retorted, his face turning into a scowl.

I sniffed. "That's for me to know."

Nikki looked me up and down.

"You look good, though. Like a fucking groupie."

I clenched my hands. He was just saying that to get on my nerves. "Bitch, please. You wish I was a fucking groupie."

It came out sassy and confident and everything I dreamed it would be to shove some words back into his beautiful face. Vince was holding drinks beside Nikki.

"Does he know?" I whispered into Tommy's ear, eyeing Vince.

"Yeah..." Tommy said. "We had to tell him. We used your phone for evidence."

"Oh wow. That reminds me. Where is my phone?"

Tommy looked sheepish as he pulled the rectangular device out of his pocket. I was so happy to see it...Or I was until I saw what had been done to the screen of it. It wasn't...completely unusable but looking at it made my heart stop and rip into two. And no, that wasn't an exaggeration.

"Tommy," I whispered sadly. "What did you do to my phone?"

"I- I didn't think it would be so fragile. It was an accident. I..just got. I thought maybe if we looked on here. We could find out where you were...And..It wouldn't let us in! It wanted a passcode. And so I-I threw it. It still works though, I promise."

I looked over the phone with tears in my eyes.

This was the last piece of my past. It was the only thing I had.

I clicked the button and the screen lit up. It could've been worse.

"It's okay." I lied through my teeth. "It's just a phone."

"In forty years, I'll buy you a new one. I promise that."

It seemed so empty now. The club didn't seem like an exciting place anymore. My confidence had gone and now it was released by an exhausting sadness.

"Nova!" A joyous voice declared.

I looked up to see Linda from across the table. She waved her hands excitedly as she bounced over. She practically climbed over Tommy to get to my side. We ended up having to scooch in any way to let Nikki and Vince take their seats once more. She clung to my neck.

"I already miss you so much! You look so good!"

"Thank you-"

She kissed me.

She kissed me in front of the guys.

They all stared in shock.

"Did you sell your body to get shelter?" Tommy looked on, horrified. "Oh my god, Nova. You should've just come back home."

"What!" I declared. "No! I'm just a nice person. And Linda is a sweet gal."

"Who happens to kiss you," Nikki stated with a smirk.

"Yes. Who happens to kiss me. It's quite nice. Jealous, much?"

"Over you?" His eyes gleamed in interest.

"No. Over the fact that Linda is a babe."

Nikki snorted, "I'm sure."

"What's that supposed to mean, asshole." Linda declared.

"Nothing, nothing." Nikki shrugged. "I just didn't know you were into blondes, Nova."

"I'm into a lot of things." I retorted.

Like you, for instance. I didn't say that though.

I looked around at the table. It was nice to be back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just couldn't keep her away for so long. I love writing the boys too much.


	12. And Then She Kissed Me by KISS

Tiny fragments of glass clung to my finger-tips as I ran my hands over the shattered screen of my phone. The partying in the band had curbed the moment I had come back, aside from Vince, who seemed to be in a semi-permanent state of confusion. Of course, that could always just be the drugs and the booze. It was hard to tell with wannabe rock-stars. Although, in their case, they were more gonnabe's than anything.

I didn't know Vince like I knew Tommy or Mick or Nikki. He had arrived one day and then the next, I was gone. It wasn't like we had ever interacted beyond holding each other's shoulders in case either of us went tumbling down onto the ground.

"I can't believe she got you an I.D," Tommy said as he looked over at my picture. I looked my usual nerdy self in it. If only I had added a pair of glasses, then it would have been truly a perfect fitting nickname.

Bottles of booze outlined the couch and there were sprinkles of cocaine that were scattered on the table. Nikki hadn't placed a clock anywhere in the house. We needed one. We needed one badly. I was lucky with Linda had a clock in her house and even a calendar that had neatly scratched X's all the way until the current date. There is nothing more soul-sucking than losing your sense of time.

"Linda is great," I murmured.

"Have you two...sucked pussies yet." He tried to find a word for it.

I grimaced at the way he put it. "No," I huffed. "I don't have sex with just anyone!"

"Apparently, you just kiss anyone though." He said slyly, but there was also an underlying hardness to it that made me jerk back. I ignored it, though and focused on the more important topic at hand.

"Actually, Tommy. Oral is considered a form of sex!"

"By whose standards?" He bit back with a dorky grin.

"The fucking pope." I shook my head, sniffing, as I looked away - feigning irritation. Nikki was passed out in his room. Mick had long gone. Vince was staying with his snobby girlfriend for the time being. I knew it would come to an end soon.

Grasping at my phone, I swiped down at the button and brought out my camera. "Tommy, take a selfie with me," I demanded as I held out my phone. He leaned in, pressing against me. He was hot. I didn't mean it physically (although he was that too) but temperature-wise, he was practically burning up.

I was burning up.

I think the whole moving back and forth, Linda, and the fact I had drunk at least three and a half bottles of booze were really beginning to affect my system. Plus, time travel. I could never forget about the time-travel.

He wrapped me into the crevice of his arms as I held up the camera. His lipstick was smudged as well as his eye make-up. He looked absolutely glamorous. For the first time, in those few brief seconds of selfie mode, even though the shattered glass, I truly saw myself. I looked different - not only had my hair faded immensely but I seemed...There was an aura of confidence that surrounded me that hadn't been there before.

I snapped the picture and quickly turned the camera off.

Frankly, I didn't want to look at that girl anymore.

She wasn't me.

She couldn't be me.

I wasn't confident. I wasn't pretty. I was normal, average, and insanely boring. My head pounded and I pinched the bridge of my nose, letting my phone fall into my lap. "I wish - I wish we could get those developed." I murmured. "To make sure you remember me before I go back home."

His eyes met mine - I was still leaned into him and there was still a sloppy smile that adorned my face, although even it had slipped. His pupils were huge, blasted. No doubt he was still high from whatever drugs he had ingested that night. I had been all too lucky that we had left Starwood early and had returned home. I could only imagine his reaction had he been completely intoxicated.

In my normal senses, I would've backed away. I would've ducked out from under his grasp so that something like this would've never happened. The room got hotter and hotter and I came to the blatant realization that perhaps it was just me? The moment he pressed his lips into mine - I should've done something, but instead, I just froze, unable to do anything at all.

Tommy? Tommy! Of all the people I had hoped to kiss, Tommy hadn't been one of them. He was undeniably handsome but it wasn't in the same way as Nikki. He had been like a brother from the beginning and I thought until the end, but clearly Tommy wasn't feeling the same way. He had just been professing his love for Jessica only days before I had left off, bragging about he would just let her squirt all over him.

This had to be a dream.

But no, I pinched myself yet his lips were still pushed onto mine. His hand had grasped the back of my neck and had pulled me in closer. Finally, I pushed him back lightly with my two hands. "Tommy..." He seemed confused, like a broken-hearted puppy-dog as he tried to lean in again. I kept my hands firmly against his chest, keeping him at a distance.

"So you'll let Linda kiss you, but not me?"

"I-"

"I thought you said you liked guys too?"

My mind blanked as I struggled for something to say that wouldn't escalate the situation.

"I do, I do. I just-"

"Then what's the problem?" He wanted an answer, but I think I was in too much shock to properly give him one. I liked Nikki. I liked Nikki waaay too much to be kissing Tommy. I could care less about Nikki's feelings in the matter, but Tommy? I took no joy in hurting Tommy in any way. On the other hand, I should probably be offended. I could be as straight as a rod and still love him like a brother.

"You love Jessica, remember." I encouraged him to think about anyone else but me.

Tommy sighed as he rubbed his head into his hands. "Not as much as I love you. We searched for hours for you and I just... It made me realize how shitty it would be without you here. And the fact you want to go home..."

It sucked seeing him so serious. I should've known better of course. The fact that I had left had been a shitty, shitty thing to do. I couldn't just waltz back in and everything be the same. Tommy had thought he had lost me forever. He probably thought I had gotten sent back to my time or worse!

"I love you too, Tommy," I said, biting my lip. "But as a brother."

Suddenly his touch didn't feel so safe anymore. It wasn't anything he did, no. But I had become distinctly aware of the feeling of our skin pressed up against each other. The sweat that clung to him and myself. It was too much. So, I pushed back and refused to look into his eyes.

"You should go to bed," I whispered, my eyes were downcast.

Tommy didn't let me get the end of the conversation though. No, he did something not even I expected. He pulled me back into his arms and squeezed me tightly.

"I hate seeing you sad. It's the worst feeling in the world."

He then let go, spoke his goodnights, and threw himself onto his bed. I didn't hear a peep out of him for the next thirty minutes. I sat on the couch and hugged at my knees. I didn't know what time I fell asleep at, but I woke up to stiff joints and the sound of a guitar riff brutally blasting at my ear-drums.

I jolted awake and found myself staring at much-too bright room and the faces of the guys, snickering and laughing as I looked at them with confusion.

"What time is it?" I wiped at my eyes as I yawned. Black markings coated my wrist and I looked at them horrified to remember that I had slept in my make-up and had just smeared it over half of my face.

Tommy couldn't look at me without snickering harder than ever. I had this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that there was more than just make-up on my face. I darted off to the bathroom, my bare feet kicking over bottles as I did so. As I looked into the mirror, sure enough, there was a giant dick drawn on my forehead.

"Haha! Really funny!" I rolled my eyes as I looked for something to scrub at my face with. I took maybe fifteen minutes of hard scrubbing to get it to a faint outline of what it once was. "Who did this?" I said as I came out of the bathroom.

All I received were quiet laughs.

"We don't snitch," Nikki pointed out, a smile decorating his face.

I stepped up to him, gave a light glare, and said. "I didn't think it was you, anyway." I circled around them in a teasing manner. My arms were crossed. I stood up on my tippy-toes and got really close to Tommy's face. "You know you wanna tell me, Tommy," I whispered against his skin. His cheeks blew out as he held back his laughter.

He shook his head, looked up. "I'm not saying anything."

"Was...it...Mick!" I pointed a finger at the shorter man. He looked up at me and brought up a fist and uncurled it to reveal an elaborately pointed middle-finger.

"Wait-" I said. "Seriously! It was you!"

"How do you even guess that, man." Nikki snorted. "None of us blew it."

"It was just a random guess," I said. "I didn't think it would actually be Mick! I thought we were buddies." I pouted as I flopped myself down on the couch. I looked through the bags.

"Oooo-" Tommy spoke. "What are these!"

I flushed as he pulled out one of my new bras and dangled them. It was nice to know that nothing had changed. He was still the same, old goof-ball that I had known for the past three months. I wondered if he even remembered kissing me last night? I certainly wasn't going to bring it up.

"You know those are, you buffoon." I sniffed and held out my hand. "Now give those back."

He held the bra out and as I reached for it - he threw it back. Nikki caught them and I pushed myself back up and stomped over. I jumped up to get them. He wasn't that much taller than me. Only about six inches or so. That was only half-a-foot, no biggie. "C'mon, Nikkie. Give me the bra back."

"Whatcha gonna do for it?" He was in one of his playful moods. Whatever had happened recently - and I don't know what - had put him into a good mood.

I glared at him, an action all too common now. "Fine," I said. "Have it. I have more anyway." I huffed and turned to go back to looking through my clothes. I felt the bra bounce on the top of my head as Nikki snorted with laughter. It landed right in front of me. Bending over, I picked the bra up from the ground and put it back into the bag. When I looked up again I was met with weird stares.

Fuck, I was still wearing a dress. I turned a bright red as I pretended to not exist at that moment. This whole dress thing was far more complicated than I wanted it to be. I missed my ripped up jeans (that I had yet to rip once again).

About half an hour after that - Nikki pulled out a giant stack of flyers.

"We're going to put on a show soon, at the Starwood. I asked my manager about it and everything. Which means, we're all gonna have to pitch in and place these posters every-fucking-where. For every one flyer that another band has, we're gonna put four of our own."

He each handed us a stack to keep.

And that was how we spent the next three weeks. We'd circle the clubs, going to the Starwood, the Whiskey, the Roxy, and the Troubadour nailing down our flyers until there was practically no room left. They would stay up until dawn practicing their music while I sat and watched them.

They would stuff drinks in my hand and they would offer me blow that they had stolen off of some drunk girl or guy in one of the clubs. Of course, I didn't tell them much about what had happened with Linda and me in her home, what had been my home for week. There were just some things they didn't need to know.

It gave me enough time to explain the future to the one guy who hadn't yet talked to me as much as the other guys.

"So you're telling me that this phone - from the future - lets you call and listen to music and all that fucking shit. All in one? And you can just bring it wherever!" I had a fun time explaining to Vince how a phone worked. He seemed amazed, as they all had been.

"How much did it cost you? Several thousand dollars I bet."

"No, no. Only about three hundred." I explained easily.

"Man, the future sounds exciting."

Suddenly, Vince asked what no man had ever before.

"What am I like in the future?"

"I-I've never met you so I-"

Vince snorted. "You wouldn't be hanging out with us if we weren't fucking special."

He was right. I probably wouldn't have even been here if not for them being fucking special. I swallowed a thick glob of saliva that had gathered in my mouth. "All the partying, man." I started, looking down at his glass of whiskey. "All the drugs and shit. It gets to everyone - including you."

"Holy shit, do I die?"

I shook my head erratically. "No, no. You don't, trust me. You just get...A little bloated is all."

"I get fat." Vince blanched and looked down at his body in horror.

"It's - It's not that bad." I laughed nervously. "Just a bit of chub is all."

I had just changed something. I know I had. Granted, I didn't think it was that big of a chance and if anything - it was likely for the better. Of course, those high hopes were dashed into pieces the moment Vince simply tilted his glass back and downed it in one go.

I nearly scowled.

So much for changing the future.

The truth is - these boys wouldn't change until they were actually right in the balls with consequences. Some of them wouldn't change, period. I thought back to Tommy. Mick and Nikki would get their shit together. Vince was...He had his reasons. But Tommy would never grow up.

He also had yet to bring up the kiss.

I had a feeling he likely never would unless I brought it up myself.

It was surprisingly mature of him.

But therein laid the possibility that I was the only one to even remember it. It didn't hurt, though. It was better that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would ya'll believe me if I said that I wrote this all in four days. That's...a lot of work hahaha. Don't worry - my inspiration isn't done, but my brain is tired and my fingers are cramped. The updates might come a little slower than having four chapters written and ready to go in a single day. But DONT WORRY. There is no way i can ever abandon this fanfic after it's come a lot farther than anything else I've ever written. I hope ya'll appreciate the slight twist. 
> 
> Also - I totally hesitated on who to put as the main pairing. Like this story writes itself you have no idea. But I have a feeling that I can just make the tag as Nikki Six/Original Female Character now.


	13. Take Me To The Top by Motley Crue

Concentration.

Dexterity.

All were needed in the task of painting one's nails. At least, I thought so. I held the brush delicately against my nail bed, swiping in elegant motions. This didn't stop the brush from snagging onto a part of my skin and leaving a black streak. I frowned at it. Why? Why did it have to do this every time? And why was I so lazy that I didn't want to bother picking at it until it looked neat again? These were questions that were unlikely to be answered - not even by the universe.

I had my feet, bare, placed up on the couch in front of me. The toenails were currently drying with equally black polish. I was wearing a pair of sleeping shorts and an old t-shirt. It was early in the morning and I was the only one awake.

But tonight was a big night.

Tonight was THE night.

It was their first show as a group. Of course, none of them were prepared for it. Not really. They had no idea how it would go down. Luckily, they didn't necessarily fear the crowd. Not like I did. Me and any sort of stage performance? Hell, no.

I could barely speak to Vince without stammering - much less performing in front of an audience. I wouldn't have anything to perform anyway. I had no talents that I could speak of - aside from sheer luck, but I don't think that counted as a talent. I was quite positive that there was some divine providence that was looking directly at me because for some reason, I was still alive.

It was 1981 and yet I had made it so far.

Sure, I snorted a little cocaine and drank a few beers and kissed a girl and then kissed a guy. I hadn't died from either of those things...Yet. I wasn't planning to either. It did occur to me not long after Tommy had kissed me that I probably had herpes. Who knows how many places that boy's mouth had been and where exactly he had put it.

I looked around at the tiny apartment. We would only stay at this place for nine months. It had already been around one. So much would happen after tonight. And to think - I would be there to witness it all. It sent shivers up and down my spine. We were flat broke. Most of the clothes had either been given to us or it had been stolen. The boys relied on the girls they managed to flirt and sleep with. Most of them had no idea that they were far from the first nor would they be the last.

Bullwinkle, as the boys had affectionally called Jessica, was still Tommy's number one girlfriend. I knew for a fact they would still bang, often. How did I know this? Well, since Vince's side of their room was often empty because he stayed with Lovey, his rich girlfriend - Tommy had humbly invited me to stay in their room. I didn't think it would be as awkward as it had been.

And trust me - It had been awkward.

The number of times I had been woken up due to Tommy's sheer boredom numbered limitlessly. His long fingers had poked at my cheek so many times that his fingers no longer registered when I was sleeping. I had been happy to learn of this but, of course, he soon switched tactics afterward.

Tommy may have been physically nineteen, but his spiritual age didn't reach any higher than twelve. And that was on a good day. I could ignore many, many things in my sleep, but jumping on my bed was not one of them.

I had woken up to him slamming his long, gangly body on top of mine as bounced up and down - creating embarrassing squeaking noises out from the mattress. I could only imagine what Nikki would think, but Nikki usually slept in later than any of us. It was like Tommy was the kid, I was the mom, and Nikki was the dad that had been kicked into the other bedroom.

I would never say that in a place other than my head, but that's what it felt like.

Today had been different when I had gotten up. I had woken up to a dream. It hadn't been anything exciting. It had been quite sad, actually. I dreamed that I had been home again, I dreamed of talking to Joe, and of talking to my brother and my mom. I know that when I had woken up, there had been tears in my eyes and it felt like someone had been pinching at my heart.

I missed them.

I longed for Joe's witty responses as we casually made fun of crazy people. There would be days where we not only spilled tea, we poured the whole fucking kettle. He would have loved it in the eighties. I know he would have. He had been obsessed with Queen - to the point he had nearly named his kid after Freddie Mercury himself. Unfortunately, his girlfriend had put a stop to that.

That had been a mildly bittersweet day.

The door to mine and Tommy's room opened with a clang as the long-haired goober stuck his head out. "Since when did you get up early?"

"Since a certain someone decided they wanted to wake me up all the time," I responded casually. I flicked the brush over another nail - a second coating to what had already been applied.

"I'm hungry. Can you cook something?" He asked with a slight pout to his lips.

My brushing stopped and I looked up, blankly staring. "Tommy, on what stove?" I waved a hand towards the dumpster fire known as the kitchen. There wasn't even counter space for a fucking plate - much less anything to cook with. The stove only worked on one side and there was a family of roaches that had made their home there long ago. "Better, yet," I added. "What food?"

"I don't know. I'm just hungry."

"Tell you what, when I'm finished painting my nails. I'll go take us to get food. I have some cash in my purse."

"Since when?" Tommy said, appalled. "Do you know how many times I've asked for food and you've never once offered to go take me out somewhere. I've not been treated like the queen I am, dammit!"

I rolled my eyes and huffed. "Well, you dummy, today is special. You're gonna have your first performance tonight. As Motley Crue! Therefore, I decided to be nice today."

"I almost forgot." Tommy smiled boyishly. "I'm pumped for it. It's gonna be so fucking awesome." He paused for a brief moment. "...We do good, right?"

"Tommy, you know how I feel about revealing that sort of shit."

"C'mon. Just me. I promise I won't tell Nikki...Or Vince...or Mick. No matter how much I want to!"

"Pinky swear?" I asked, holding out my pinky.

He wrapped his large pinky around my small one and we shook on it.

"Alright. You do good." I smiled widely.

He frowned and stuck out his tongue. "That's it?"

"What do you want me to say? You get signed to a record deal at the very first show you do?"

"Something like that." He snorted, but then smiled once more. "But I'll take a good first performance over a shitty one."

After my fingernails were finished drying, I got dressed. Did I have to make sure he walked out of the house fully dressed? Yes. Did it take longer than it needed to? Oh, absolutely. It wouldn't be a normal day at the Motley house if we actually got out of the house at a decent time. We walked to the diner not far from the house.

"I want blueberry pancakes, please."

"I'll have just regular pancakes, also bacon, and eggs. With a Dr. Pepper." I smiled politely.

The waitress nodded as she took our orders. Tommy looked at me with suspicious eyes. I nearly folded under his gaze. He had forgotten about my eating problem - if you could call it that. It had been a while since we had eaten around each other. Usually, we made a pit-stop at his home and hoarded a lot of the snacks and the left-overs his mother was willing to give us. She was such a sweet woman and often just gave us all of them. We never ate in front of each other, though. I always made sure not to.

I had wanted the whole thing to be forgotten about.

Of course, I had forgotten I wanted that until the very moment the waitress had asked for our orders. He tapped his hand against the table.

"Public Enemy #1?" I asked.

His brown eyes lit up. "Dude, how did you know?"

"Who do you take me for? I've only watched almost every Motley Crue practice, ever. I'm just as hyped as you are for the performance, tonight. I may even wear heels - just to show my support."

"Aww, man. You should see these shoes that Nikki has been saving up in his closet!" Tommy exclaimed. "They're red and they go all the way up to his thighs. I don't know how he plans to wear those things for so long. I don't know how chicks do it. Those things fucking hurt."

The waitress came over with our plates of food. She frowned at Tommy's use of language. "This is a family establishment," she reminded.

"Sorry, dude." Tommy ran his fingers through his hair. He inhaled the scent of his blueberry pancakes and dug in. Despite the amount of food I had versus him - I still finished mine first. It wasn't something I was proud of, but it's true.

"I'll trade you some of my pancakes for a piece of bac-" He looked up at my plate. I had only about half a piece of bacon left along with a tiny bite of a pancake remaining. "Dude, you shouldn't eat so fast. You're gonna make yourself puke-" He then accusingly waved a pancake-covered fork at my facee. "Unless that's your plan!"

"Eat your pancakes, Tommy," I demanded with a scowl.

"I still want that piece of bacon." He plopped down the piece of the blueberry pancake before stuffing MY bacon into his mouth before I could even protest. He smiled through his chews.

"I don't even like blueberries." I sniffed.

"How do you not like blueberries?"

"The same reason you don't like to eat anything green."

"Touche."

I paid for our meal with future money. I was hoping that I could just throw it on the counter before they could really inspect it. It was a crisp twenty-dollar bill that had been made in the 21st century. I was kind of hoping they wouldn't notice. The waitress didn't bother to look twice as she took it and placed it into the register.

Seriously, I was surviving on pure luck and nothing more.

"I can't believe you've been holding on to some cash this entire time."

"I was saving it for special occasions."

We walked back to the apartment to find Nikki looked confusedly around the apartment. His eyes widened once he saw us.

"Nova took me to get foood-" Tommy declared.

"We were thinking about getting you something," I said with a knowing smile.

"And?" Nikki bit out.

"We didn't." I shrugged.

"That's fucked up." He rubbed at his eyes, yawning. "I wasn't hungry, anyway. What time is it?"

"Around ten in the morning." I shrugged. "We have a few hours until the show starts."

"Vince promised to be here around twelve."

"And Mick?"

Nikki blinked slowly. "He didn't say much."

"He never does." I agreed. "He's quite mysterious."

Nikki snorted, raising a brow at my choice of words. "Mysterious?"

"I don't regret what I said." I sighed as I flung myself onto the couch. Tommy then looked at me with suspicious eyes. I didn't notice when he disappeared into the bathroom. It was often said that as long as you were able to hear your kids - everything was fine. It was only when it was silent that they were doing something naughty. I should've taken those words to heart.

His plan had come to complete fruition.

"I took a massive dump in there!" He announced proudly.

"Thanks for sharing," Nikki said dryly.

"And it smells really bad," Tommy emphasized. I glared at him in response. "So I don't recommend going in there."

"Dude." Nikki groaned. "Stop."

"I was just letting you know. Roomie's honor."

Tommy kept thinking he was smart. I'll give him credit for it. There was no way I was going in there, but he seemed to forget that just because I'm a girl didn't mean I was averse to throwing up in a bush...or his shoes, whichever one worked. It was sweet what he was trying to do. Really, it was.

But had I been chubby, had I been fat - time travel or not - these dudes wouldn't have spoken another word to me. I knew that for a fucking fact. I'd would have been another ugly chick in their book who they mocked. I hated throwing up, but I was happier this way. It wasn't like I was skinny. I was still a bit chubby in my thighs and stomach. Both of which I hated showing in any way - so the fact that they had me wearing skirts and tube tops should mean a lot. I knew it didn't. Not to them.

I blinked my eyes shut.

I had to stop going into such a negative place.

Not today. Anytime but today. This was meant to be an awesome day where the whole world got to see Motley Crue for what they were: amazing.

Sure enough, Vince arrived on time for one last final jam-out session before we had to head to the Starwood to set up. Tommy had traded his car in for a van of all things. He had nicknamed it "the Love Shack" and it was a struggle to ride in the back simply because of the faint smell of burritos and sex that seemed to linger.

Bullwinkle had no doubt squirted all over the place and then some. Not just Bullwinkle, either. Tommy and Nikki had a habit of bringing girls into the Love Shack together. I remembered reading in the book that whenever they cheated on their girlfriends - they would attain just enough money for one egg burrito and then they would proceed to rub their dicks into it to mask the smell of sex from their girlfriends.

It was almost enough to make me vomit.

Boys were disgusting.

That was a fact by this point.

After we had the van loaded without instruments, we got down to getting ready. I stuffed myself into a black, leather crop top. I hated it, of course. It made me feel so exposed. I wanted to do nothing but burrow myself into a sweater. I had to look like a part of the Crue - even just a little bit. They couldn't be seen hanging around with a nerd like me. I was willing to do that for them. My pride for their success.

It clung against my skin so tightly that I couldn't even wear a bra. Not that it needed one considering just how attached to my skin it was. I added a mini-skirt and while I would wear heels at the start, there was no way that I would be caught standing in those death-lifts for more than two hours. Haha. No.

I snuck a pair of flatter shoes in my extra ugly purse, which I would be carrying. I would leave my phone tucked inside of my pillow. I wasn't worried about anyone stealing it. I was worried about the after-party that would likely follow. If not after tonight, then after all the other concerts they would perform. And it would lead us into the beginning scene of the film. Where they would party hard, have sex with everything in sight, and snort coke with even less care than usual. Thus was the life of a rockstar.

The boys got dressed at the backstage of the Starwood. They wanted to surprise everyone. They wore heels, sure, and they even wore make-up. This time, it was different. It was red, black, white, and leather. So much leather. Hairspray had formed into a thick cloud backstage as Nikki poofed up his hair.

His fingers were coated in black, from smearing his signature two lines - one for each cheek. His red shoes - fuck me - if it didn't try and make the bisexuality button in my brain start spasming. Who knew dudes in heels and make-up could be so fucking attractive. I had to do everything in my entire power to not let my jaw drop to the ground.

"You ready for this?" I tentatively asked. It was geared towards Nikki but left open to the rest of the members. Mick was already ready and was practicing his finger movements on the guitar.

There was a thing of lipstick in my hand. Tommy had asked me to apply it to him. I knew he could do it himself, but I think he liked having the attention. Of course, Vince had also asked for help with his make-up. I almost said no, but then I remembered that I had wanted to be nice and supportive tonight, for their big break.

This was the first time the band had actually needed a set-list. I actually really liked their first, future album. It was one of my favorites. I preferred it over Theatre of Pain or Girls Girls Girls. They were all more-than-decent, of course. There was just something about it being their roots that kept me more interested.

"Hell, yeah." Nikki kept pushing his hair out, spraying more and more of that liquid glue.

"Wish us luck?" Tommy asked eagerly.

I smirked. "You don't need luck. You're Motley fucking Crue and you're gonna do amazing."

"Do you know that or are you just saying that?"

A smile crossed my face but I didn't respond. "I'll be out with the crowd."

I left the backstage room and quickly went into the floor portion of the Starwood. I saw Lovey there. She was in her pristine clothes and her hair was perfectly waved. She was a bit of a bitch but I stepped up beside her anyway.

"They looked amazing." I boasted. "And to think - you thought their music was too heavy."

"I just want Vince to be successful," Lovey smirked. "He deserves that."

I thought so too.

The guys stepped out. It was almost surreal seeing them up on stage. God, I could just..I saw why girls would scream at their presence, why they would worship them like gods. Or they would, at least, but I saw what those girls saw.

"We're Motley Crue!" Vince shouted into the microphone.

I saw Nikki place the setlist in front of them. They started to sing "Take Me To The Top". I had almost forgotten about the fact that their first performance had started off in a fight. Some guy near Lovey and I had decided it was a good idea to spit on Vince's pants. It wasn't a good idea, of course, because Vince and Nikki didn't put up with that bullshit. They won their fight and the man got thrown out and as they got back up, their eyes glanced at me, and then at the crowd - widened in horror at the fact they may have just blown their entire career.

They didn't.

I knew that for a fact because the crowd became a sea of chanting and cheering. They began to play again. It was a magical moment watching above in their boots and make-up and hair. God, their hair. I had such a hair kink. It was unreal. There were only a few hundred of us in attendance - if even that. But boy if people didn't start cheering and jamming as they waved their hands.

"Nova!" came a feminine voice.

I turned to see Linda waving at me. I was tempted to ignore her. That feeling alone should have told me that I had been spending far too much time with Motley Crue, but instead, I pushed through it and waved back. She joined Lovey and me.

"Exciting, isn't it?" Linda spoke over the roar of the music. "I saw the flyers all over! They're really good!"

As they were half-way through their last song, "Tonight", I slipped off into the bathroom. I ignored the sounds of one couple fucking in the stalls as well as the drug deals that were going on. I pulled off my heels and reluctantly let my nearly bare feet touch the ground. I pulled on my flats. My feet still ached all over but it was much easier now. I stuffed my heels into my bag.

Linda had followed me into the bathroom. She pulled out a few dollar bills and got a bag of blow in return. She scooped some up with the long nail of her pink finger and snorted it. She offered me some.

"I don't know," I murmured.

"C'mon. It wasn't so bad with me. I wouldn't let anything bad happen to you." Linda assured me, but she was also high. I don't what it was about her that made me trust her completely but I walked out of that bathroom with a semi-familiar sting up my nose just in time to see them finish.

Well, it wasn't completely finished.

The crowd demanded an encore.

Nikki, of course, was never one to turn that type of clout down. He whispered the song to the guys. It was a song that wasn't released to the public. I had heard it several times. It slapped hard, but apparently not hard enough for a record label apparently.

It was during that song that I finally felt the happiest I had been that day. Cocaine had a habit of giving someone overly dramatic feelings. Whether it be happiness, excitement, energy, or, in some cases, anger and even sadness. When the band truly finished - it was wild. People were begging for them to come back out.

Vince did come back out - inviting them to the after-party along with giving them our address. It almost wasn't necessary with just how close the Motley house was to the Starwood. We were truly right on top of the Sunset Strip.

I went into the back, along with Lovey.

"You did so great!" I practically screamed as I hugged Tommy, who was covered in sweat. I was giggly, happy, completely buzzed. My skin felt like there were bees buzzing inside of my veins. It wasn't a horrible feeling. It was quite the opposite.

"You did good, baby," Lovey stated as she brought Vince into a searing kiss.

"We need to go, soon! Half of the crowd has left before us. There'll be a party at the house before we even arrive."

Tommy squinted his eyes. "Are you okay?"

"I'm better than ever! That was so good!" I smiled widely. It was probably the biggest smile I had ever flashed him, ever. He dropped all suspicions as he brought me back into a hug.

"And you Mick! You're so fucking cool!"

I gave him a hug as well.

Which shocked him more than it shocked me at that time.

We loaded up the van as fast as we could before we broke the speed limit by at least twenty miles per hour. We opened up the door - we didn't even bother unloaded the van before we piled up into the house. We got out all the beer we could before we sent Mick and Vince to go get some more.

It turns out we didn't even have to.

There were at least forty people that had decided to come after the party. There were forty people squeezed into a house. A majority of them had brought their own drinks or drugs. I hadn't even seen Jessica but apparently she had been there too.

It was the adrenaline, the drugs, but it was exactly as it was at the beginning. Tommy was eating his girlfriend out and I was there just in time to witness her squirt across the living room. I found it to be fucking awesome.

Linda had come as well. She was coated in sparkles so I never lost track of her. "Here," she said. "Have some more." More cocaine was stuffed up my nose. I had made sure to try and snort it secretly. I still didn't want the guys to find out I knew how to do it. I don't know why. It wasn't like they would judge me, but there was still this fear that they would look at me differently.

I didn't want to be just some dumb groupie who fucked them and did drugs with them. I was their friend, first and foremost. It was like a bros-before-hoes moment, but with myself. Bro-before-hoe. The idea had me snort out loud.

The hours crept as alcohol was sloshed into stomachs and onto the carpet. Pills were dropped in crevices that would never be exposed to the daylight ever again. Linda had disappeared and I was busy watching Nikki set himself on fire.

He was showing off to a gaggle of girls - trying to prove how punk he was.

It made me furious.

He didn't know it, but he was mine. I didn't care if he fucked other girls. That wasn't the problem. The problem was...Well. I didn't exactly know what the problem was. My thoughts were practically incoherent and in places they shouldn't have been. Perhaps that was what had lead me into doing something rather stupid.

No...There was no perhaps about it.

I had definitely done something extremely stupid and had hit a record number on the wild-child scale I had never even breached before.

But there was no time to think about it. Oh no.

I spent that time being pushed into a wall, my legs wrapped around Nikki's waist, and his teeth practically clanging against mine. It was almost humiliating. His kiss wasn't like Tommy's kiss. It wasn't warm nor sweet. It was nothing but pure aggression. I loved it. It was like being shot by a lightning bolt. I had never felt anything so intense before. It was either the drugs or a side-effect of having effectively cock-blocked myself for three months.

I could remember pushing Nikki into the wall - much to the aghast of everyone at the party. They had expected a fight to break out. They hadn't expected me to yank him down by the hair and proceed to nom on his face. He had then reversed our roles and I don't know, but we had made it to his bedroom.

Did he throw me on his bed? Yes.

Did we have sex? Unfortunately, not.

Because it was at that point in time - where I was looking at his gorgeous make-up smeared face - that I remembered that he rubbed his dick in egg burritos. I proceeded to spontaneously burst out into laughter and ramble off on some incoherent tangent.

Moment ruined.

"The fuck? Are you high?"

"No," I lied.

Apparently, Nikki had some sort of a conscious, even while equally blasted out of his mind, because he fucking ignored the fact that I wanted him right then and there in favor of locking me in his room. It didn't bother me too much. His bed was comfy. Much comfier than the one in my room.

I was in Nikki Sixx's bed.

That thought alone made me giggle out loud and a smile that was so wide and dorkish looking that it would make Tommy proud spread out onto my face. I fell asleep with that thought in my mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It finally fucking happened.
> 
> Also - edit: shortened the title, kept the egg pun. Almost every weird fact I put into this story that seems so random - like the thing with the burritos - comes from the book. They actually did that shit. So now all I can think of is the fact they fucked their girlfriends with dicks covered in burrito sauce.


	14. I've Just Seen A Face by The Beatles

The scent of booze and cigarettes still clung to the walls when I woke up. I hadn't slept for long but it was long enough for the after-party to have dwindled down. It didn't happen as it did in the movies. I didn't wake up with no memory of the night before, although it barely counted as the night. I had no doubt fallen asleep into the early morning hours. I could remember most of it. I hadn't been completely drugged out of mind for days on end, after all.

His mouth had hit mine so hard that I was tempted to check for a bruise in the bathroom mirror. Instead, I simply cupped at my lips, rubbing my fingertips across the sensitive skin. I should never have given in. I shouldn't have even done it at the Starwood. I knew enough about their future to know that their drug use would bring them no good. Woe is being human and knowing something did not change the temptation, in fact, it only seemed to amplify it.

The bed smelled of hairspray. I didn't want to leave it. I didn't want to go out the door and see my roommates and look at their faces. There's no way they didn't know. I had done it completely out in the open. I could only imagine what Tommy had thought. I thought of him as a brother, but Nikki? I doubt anyone had seen that coming. I doubt anyone actually thought I would ever get high.

I certainly hadn't. Exhaling softly, I pushed myself into a sitting position. I couldn't stay in Nikki's room forever, no matter how much I wanted to. Plus, there was no telling when the last time he changed these sheets was. How many girls had he fucked on this bed? These thoughts were enough to make me cringe and practically jump up. I was still clothed, luckily. I know he left me, but it was always best to make sure.

C'mon Nova.

I could open that fucking door and face what I did with pride. I could! My hands shook as I went to clutch at the handle. I wanted to vomit. I did not want to see Nikki or Mick or Tommy or whatever. I had almost had sex with Nikki. Almost.

I really was a fucking groupie.

The door clicked beneath my hand as I pulled it open and silently ducked my head out, listening for any sounds. I wanted to avoid confrontation. I wanted to dash into Tommy and me's room, stuff my face into a pillow, and then never speak to Nikki ever again. There was no way I could do it without my face turning red and tears wanting to spill out from my eyes. The way I had acted had been absolutely humiliating.

I teetered over the carpet, held my breath, as I eyed the groups of people in the living room. There weren't that many. I could see small packets of coke and lines having been smeared over practically every surface. There were piles upon piles of pills. Many of them had scattered onto the floor.

Most of them were asleep or barely shuffling around on their section of the carpet. Two of them were girls and neither had their shirts on. I wanted to avoid looking - I wanted to be polite and shy, but time with the Crue had begun to strip me of those traits. I personally found their tits to be better than their faces, which were covered in thick globs of make-up and teased hair. They were leaning against each other and I could see hickeys that lined their necks and collarbones, down to their breasts.

On the couch was someone I wasn't quite ready to face yet. Nikki Sixx stared up at the ceiling. I couldn't tell if he was sober or not, but he hadn't looked in my direction. He could be ignoring me or he could be high out of his fucking mind. I pussied out and looked at the door to my bedroom. There was a chance I could find Vince with his dick out and several girls, or Tommy also with his dick out and several girls. Maybe even Mick? Maybe all three of them?

I didn't mind though. If I really had to - I could just stuff myself into the tiny closet on my side of the bedroom. I wasn't sure if I could fit, but I could definitely try. I made a move for the door.

"You're really fucking strong." His voice rang out, making me freeze in my tracks.

I stopped and gently turned my head to look at him. His emerald green eyes were pointed directly at me. There were now deep, indented teeth marks in the side of my cheek. I wasn't quite sure what to say to him, except:

"Thanks."

It was an awkward silence.

"I used to play softball. I was - I was good with a bat." I explained because I didn't know whether or not to leave, to disappear into the room. It was easier - talking to him. It had been harder in my brain. I knew that. I had always known that, but that didn't stop me from wanting to have a panic attack only moments earlier.

"Why'd you quit?"

"I just..I didn't want to do it anymore."

I had quit in the eleventh grade. My passions had always been fickle and never in my life had I ever considered softball to be a passion, but I suppose it had been something to do. Once I quit, I had nothing to keep me from going directly home where I could sling my book bag onto the floor of my bedroom and throw myself beneath the blankets and sleep until dinner. Sometimes I would eat, sometimes I wouldn't, but as soon as I could leave, I would go back into my room. I would remain there until I had to go to a school I couldn't stand.

"You probably gave me bruises." His lips curled.

"Did I?" I asked.

"I dunno. I didn't bother to look."

I looked to the ground and murmured, "I'm sorry about kissing you."

"Why?" He snorted, but he seemed more amused than insulted.

"I just shouldn't have done it."

"But did you want to?"

No.

Yes.

"I- I don't know."

For some reason, he accepted my answer. There was nothing but curiosity in his eyes as he looked at me. Every time I caught them, his eyes, I would flicker them away. I couldn't stand actually looking at him. They said that the eyes were the window to the soul. It didn't work like that for me. I knew his soul. I had read his fucking diaries. I knew the type of person he was, but I also knew the type of person he was capable of being.

He didn't have sex with me because he knew that I was high.

Granted, would he have cared if it had been some other girl? A girl like one of the two who were currently dazed out on our house floor? I have no idea. There was kind of a sick, twisted feeling of relief that released the weight, the tension that I held on my shoulders. Why? I think I was just happy he didn't see me as some dumb groupie.

"Since when did you get high?" He asked. I knew the question had been coming. It still made me wince.

I bit back, "Since when did you care?"

He let out a weak, sedated chuckle, but he didn't answer my question. "After I kissed you, I had sex with those two girls over there."

My stomach didn't drop.

My knees didn't go weak.

And I definitely didn't want to cry.

Instead, I looked at them, put a smile on my face. "I can't blame you." I don't think that was the answer he had been expecting because his cocky smirk had fallen and was replaced with something far more contemplative.

"I...You're such a fucking nerd."

It was silly, but he said it in such a way that it placed a smile back on my face. It felt more like a compliment than it did an insult. I turned my head away and opened the door to my room and sure enough, I got a perfect view of both Tommy and Vince with their dicks out - they were both draped in women. I didn't even wonder what happened to Jessica.

I walked towards the closet and opened the door.

It turns out I didn't even have to.

Maybe it was cruel to pull her out of her resting spot, but I didn't care. I pulled her out and let her drop entirely to the floor. She didn't wake up. I ducked inside the closet and shut the door. I was trapped in complete darkness.

I didn't mind.

I simply held my hands around my knees and I pressed my head against the wall. It had gone much better than I had expected. But there was still Tommy and I had no idea how he would react.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man - I wish I could write monster-sized chapters like I did with that last one. I don't even know how it happened. I just got into that zone, yaknow. I'm really glad people seem to be enjoying this story! Also - I just felt we needed some more of Nikki X Nova. So this was a good excuse to write a nice-ish moment between the two of them.


	15. Paranoid by Black Sabbath

It soon turned out that Tommy didn't even fucking know.

At least, that's what it appeared to be as I watched him scuffle down another big plate of blueberry pancakes. I had said he could order as much as he wanted. He had, of course, attained a baffled expression that automatically made me realize what exactly I had just done to my wallet.

I'm sure it must have displayed on my face because Tommy looked up from mid-bite, "What?" He asked with a weird shrug to his shoulders. "I'm hungry."

"You're always hungry." I murmured, looking down at my hands.

"Is something wrong?" He persisted. He stabbed a piece of pancake and waved it in front of my face. "Did you realize how much you need blueberries in your life?"

A scowl appeared on my face as I tilted my head away from the fork. A large drizzle of maple syrup dripped down on the table. "Tommy," I spoke, aghast. "You're getting it all over the table."

"It's not alll oveeerr. Just there." He pointed at the spot and we both watched as bits of the pancake itself fell onto the surface. Suddenly, a horrifyingly mischievous smirk adorned his face. He grabbed at the maple syrup bottle and gently poured it on the table.

"Tommy!" I exclaimed. "Are you crazy?"

"I don't know. Are you?" His eyes went accusatory as his fingers clenched around the handle of syrup bottle.

Oh shit.

He did know.

Mayday. Mayday. This plane was crashing and it was crashing down all around me. I wanted to feign ignorance, but I knew Tommy didn't deserve that. "Maybe?" I shrugged.

Instead of getting angry or lecturing me, however, he instead dared me to lick up all the maple syrup he had just spilled. I looked at the golden substance with a held-back groan. It had been a false alarm. I don't know how Tommy didn't know. I'm just glad he didn't. I'm glad that it was one less conversation that I had to have. I had acted like an absolute hoe last night. It had been nice, it had been...erotic and it wouldn't be something that I would ever forget. It was probably best that I should at least try to forget it, though. Could I handle being with Nikki Sixx? I wasn't so sure. Hell, I could barely handle being with Motley Crue.

"Triple dog dare," Tommy insisted.

Oh, man.

I knelt down, my face close to the table, inhaled, and then let my tongue fall onto a table that probably hadn't been properly wiped in days. Luckily, the syrup coated all other flavors and was the only thing I tasted as I licked it up.

"Dude...I didn't even think you would actually do it!" Tommy laughed. "Did you bring your phone?"

I lurched back with a frown on my face. "No! I wouldn't let you take a picture of that anyway."

"Awww, but it'd be a good memory."

"For you!" I exclaimed. I took a sip of my soda and tried to get rid of the taste of maple syrup out of my mouth.

"So, so you take me out to breakfast, again. You actually do my dare...Is this about what happened last night?"

That fucker. He was just waiting for me to drink my soda. I choked on the sugary liquid and looked up to see a huge grin planted on his face.

"Wha-What do you mean?"

"You got hiiiighhh...out of your mind and kissed Nikki." He shrugged.

"I- Yeah. I did." I looked down.

"Sick. We're such horrible influences." He giggled at his own shitty joke.

"You're not mad?" I asked.

"What for? We all do stupid shit when we're high. It's not like you meant to kiss Nikki! Do you know how many ugly bitches I've kissed while fucking sober. Even more when I'm high. I'm just shocked you actually snorted. When did that start?"

Oh.

OH.

He thought it was an accident.

I mean - it was an accident. Of course, I didn't mean to kiss Nikki!

The lie sounded so phony, even just to myself. I had wanted Nikki for months now. Months! Tommy didn't know that. Nobody had known that. Except maybe Mick, but Mick knows everything so I don't think even he really counted.

"L-Linda," I stammered. "With Linda."

"Nice." He said. "Now we can have some reaaal fun at the clubs. No more No-Fun-Nova."

I was absolutely traumatized.

"No-Fun-Nova," I repeated.

Tommy looked sheepish.

"Is that what you guys call me?" I accused.

He didn't answer and promptly stuffed his face with more pancakes. I didn't even have time to get really offended because whatever lady that had been waiting for us had been replaced with the woman from last time. I didn't think much of it until she pointed a thin, pointy finger at me.

"You're the girl who gave me false cash!"

Uh, oh.

I blanched at the accusation. I had forgotten about that. I didn't even think she would notice it, but of course, it was bound to get noticed eventually. Tommy stuffed his mouth with one less bite as we stumbled from our seats.

"Oh no, you don't!" The waitress declared. "I had to get that taken from my wages-"

She tried to block me from leaving the diner. I should have made Tommy pay, but I knew that fucker didn't have cash on him. I should've done something other than what I did. But, Tommy was right. He and the rest of Motley Crue were bad influences because the first thing I did was slam my right fist right into the waitress's face.

It felt good.

It felt better than it had any right to be.

We ran out onto the pavement of the Sunset Strip. We kept running until we felt we were at a safe enough distance. Tommy was cracking up the entire time and by the time we got back to the house - I was sure the whole neighborhood had heard the fucking story. So, of course, when we opened the door to the house.

"Nikki! Guess what Nova did!"

Nikki had jolted up from his place on the couch. Mick was lightly strumming on the guitar and Vince was likely still passed out in our room.

"I punched a waitress," I muttered.

"It was bad-ass."

"It was wrong," I added. "But, I may or may not have slipped her twenty dollars in cash...From the future and she was going to call the cops, I think. So I punched her and we left."

"Tommy's right, kid. That was bad-ass...but stupid." Mick snorted. "That's technically assault, in broad daylight."

"I know." I was really fucking ashamed.

"It must have hurt like a bitch," Nikki remarked casually.

How did he know- Oh. My face burned at remembering that he had, in fact, been pushed around by me before.

"Dude, you left an imprint of Nikki on our wall," Tommy mentioned excitedly as he grabbed my hand and drug me over to where I had pushed Nikki into. Sure enough, there was a little dint that hadn't been there before.

"It be like that sometimes," I stated off-handedly.

Flashes of what happened last night were now going through my mind. I must have seemed like some sort of beast. I could remember him throwing me onto his bed, the sting of my lips, and the heat from his. I tore my eyes away from the dent. If I focused on it too much - things were gonna get a little too heated.

I had a feeling they already were.

"Oh...Which of you bastards gave me the nick-name No-Fun-Nora!" I declared randomly trying to change the subject.

Nikki snorted and raised a few fingers.

I glared down at him.

"Whatcha gonna do about it? Throw me into a wall, again?"

Oh, no.

It was like a bolt of electricity had struck right into my naval. The good kind of electricity, though.

"Maybe I will." I stuck up my noses and crossed my arms.

"Maybe I want you to?" Nikki stated as he pushed himself up off the couch. We were all of a sudden a lot closer than we were before.

It was intense, electric, and extremely irritating. Luckily for me, Mick coughed from across the room. Both he and Tommy were awkwardly staring at us. "We need to talk about performing some more, Nikki. Where to, next."

Nikki drug his eyes away from mine and looked at Mick.

"Anyone who will have us."

"Is Vince still in our room?" I then asked.

"No, he went with Lovey while you two were away."

"Okay, good," I mumbled and hurried out of the living room and into my shared room. I wrinkled my nose at the thick smell of sex and booze. There was no way - no way - I was sleeping on those sheets.

"Tommy!" I called out. "Come here!"

He poked his head in through the door. "Yes, mom?"

I sneered, "Shut up. Do you think your mom will let us wash these sheets at her house?"

"I don't see why not."

"Okay, good. Help me." I asked, but then added, "Please?"

We tore the sheets off the beds and gathered them up. I didn't even bother going to ask for Nikki for his. He could do his own damn laundry. To be fair, I was technically doing Vince's and Tommy's, buuut...Those were just specifics. It was all for my benefit.

Mrs. Bass had been ecstatic to see me again.

"Oh, Nova! It's been too long! We were so worried." She clung to me, dousing me in her motherly affections. It was nice. It made me miss my own mom. Mrs. Bass threw a glare at her son. "Tommy never told us you returned home."

"Sorry?" he laughed. "We just got caught up. Mom! We had our first show and it was an absolute blast."

"Really?" Mrs. Bass asked.

"Yeah, we'll be rockstars in no time."

"And, Nova, dear? Are you part of the group?"

"Yes, I play the triangle." I joked.

"The triangle?"

She had taken me seriously. I hated that when it happened.

"It's the instrument that's in the shape of a triangle. It was just a joke, Mrs. Bass." I assured her. "I'm just a tag-along."

"She really discredits herself. She's as much part of Motley Crue as I am." Tommy boasted.

It caused a smile to light upon my face.

We went back to the Motley house soon after. I re-fixed the sheets on Vince's and or my bed and threw the other set on Tommy's. He was likely gonna kick it off anyways. I pulled out my phone from the pillow. It had been tossed aside and I hadn't bothered to grab it to clean it.

I'm glad I had not, mostly because I had totally forgotten that I had placed my phone inside of it. The last thing I needed was to accidentally drown my phone. I fluffed the pillow back onto the bed. Why have a pillow made of cotton - when you can have a pillow made of boobs? There was some logic to that statement. No doubt Vince lived through those unsaid words vicariously.

Living with Motley Crue had given me the desire to be clean.

Fuck - these dudes were fine living in complete filth. They were fine living in a house swarming with insects. I wasn't. There wasn't much I could do about the majority of the bugs, but the least I could do was have a bed that didn't smell like an STD.

I plopped down on top of the mattress.

It was like a rock, but rock was better than the closet floor. I had woken up in the closet completely cramped up. My back was still sore having been propped there for at least two hours. The girls had gone sometime while I had been stuck in the closet. There was a gay joke in that I'm sure.

Mick had been awake as well. He had slept in the bathtub. I was quite jealous of that actually and I wish I had thought about doing that first, but of course, I had been nomming off Nikki's face and had been otherwise preoccupied. I glanced over at my phone.

I had no idea where my earbuds were. Somewhere stuffed in the crack between the bed and the wall. I was too lazy to look for them. I brushed my fingers over my phone. I really was lucky to have saved up all of my music favorites. These dudes were just gonna have to deal with listening to my shitty future music while I crammed my face against the pillow.

Happiness Is A Butterfly - Lana Del Rey

It was the first one I clicked. I was tempted to put in on repeat, but I wasn't sure if I wanted the boys to feel as though I was trying to give some sort of message. I heard them jamming in the room over. There was no way they would hear the light melodies of my music? Right? Wrong. Dead, wrong. For some reason, despite playing the instruments as loud as they possibly could - their hearing was far, far superior to my own. It was absolutely ridiculous.

"What is that?" Came a snarky voice.

"My music," I responded, although my voice was muffled. I looked up at Nikki - who seemed a bit miffed that I was playing any other music other than our own. "The hot girl on my phone. This is her."

"It's boring."

"I just wanna dance with you-" I somewhat sang along before plopping my face back down into the pillow.

"It figures that this is the sort of stuff you listen to."

It's like he knew what buttons to push. I scoffed as I pulled myself up to a sitting position. "I listen to all sorts of stuff," I retorted. "Not just Lana Del Rey."

"What year does she get famous? So I can avoid the radio."

"For your information, by the time she becomes famous, you're not half as snobby," I said without even thinking.

He narrowed his eyes. "How would you know that?"

"Um...Time traveler, remember?"

"Yes, but, you've heard of me."

I paused and wanted to answer, but I didn't. He smirked anyway.

"I knew making this band was the right decision. So I become a poser in the future?" He groaned at my silence as I put a stop to my phone. "Oh now you don't want to say anything?"

"No." I retorted. "I don't want to change anything. That's like rule number one of time traveling."

"Did you ever think that maybe you were sent back to do something cool?"

I blinked.

"Nikki, you summoned me through a ritual."

"You've yet to answer my question." He added. "If I become successful? I've guessed it on my own, just by your reactions. You're horrible at hiding these things."

He seemed so much closer now. "Do you think that if I answer it - I'll be sent back home?" I croaked.

"Do you not want to?" He pestered me with questions. "You always talk about it. About how much you miss it."

"I do not."

"You do."

He got close. Too close. He was standing up beside the bed, looking down at me. There was something devilish in his eyes. I was frozen in my spot though. He was right. I did miss home. I missed it badly.

And then his hands - they were tracing over my arms as he knelt down. Goosebumps were left in the wake of his touch. I was like a scared animal. Fight or flight. Which one would I choose? Perhaps there was a third option? Where I just allowed myself to get eaten because that seemed to be what I was leaning towards.

That wasn't just a metaphor.

I was leaning into his touches.

"Do I become successful?"

He seemed to contemplate something as I kept my mouth firmly shut. We stared directly at each other. My heartbeat so loud I was so sure he could hear it. I took hold of myself.

"You're wrong," I managed to get out. "I don't want to go home. Not yet."

I jumped out of the bed so fast. I didn't even know I had it in me.

I had chosen flight.

Nikki Sixx had just tried to seduce me.

Did he want me to go home? It was tempting to test it. It really was, but I wasn't done with Motley Crue. I couldn't just go back home the moment I felt like I was doing something with my life.

Maybe a few weeks ago I would've gone for it, but I was different now.

I looked at him, my heart still beating erratically in my chest. There was a smirk to his face. It wasn't just me. It was us. We were different now. This had been exactly what I had been trying so hard to avoid.

It didn't end there.

The door to my room opened as Tommy rushed in.

"Nova, the cops are here." He whispered.

"Are you serious?" I exclaimed quietly.

He then looked between Nikki and me and his eyes narrowed. "Yeah, definitely. Mick is distracting them. But we should probably get Nova out of here at least until they go away. There was a window at the end of the room. Nikki worked fast and opened the door easily. It couldn't lock and it never really stayed in place. It was a very shitty window, but luckily for us, we were very shitty people, so it worked out just fine.

I climbed out of the window and dropped down to the ground. I saw a police car outside. They weren't really prepared for me to flee, or, I think, for me to even be in the shitty house. Someone must have known Tommy and had known where he lived. Nikki had been really fond of that diner, after all. The band went there to eat the most because there was no way they could cook for themselves. Not that they ate much anyways.

I knew exactly whose house I could go to in this time of crisis.


	16. Public Enemy #1 by Motley Crue

Linda wasn't home.

I stared up at the steps of her apartment with sad eyes. The door was locked and there was no key under the mat. She was probably wrecked after a party in some house. Knowing her, she had likely left the key inside of the home. She kept a spare in her purse. Overall, I was completely and utterly doomed.

"I could go to Mr. and Mrs. Bass's house." I murmured to myself, thinking. I was sat atop of the steps, my hands cradling my head. There was no way I could go to jail. If I went to jail, they would find out that I'm not technically a citizen. I would likely get deported into Mexico or something - any place that wasn't America. I could barely speak Spanish. Barely and it was basically a list of words rather than anything truly coherent. "Maybe they've gone?" I asked myself. "Maybe, they don't really care?"

But then - flashes of the room were pictured in my mind. Pills, smears of cocaine, all sorts of drugs. All of those were in our shitty home. My imagination took ahold as I saw Tommy hurriedly stuffing drugs down the toilet. It took all I had to take the image seriously. What if the boys had gotten in trouble? Because of me?

Granted, it was bound to happen sooner or later. We had a getaway plan for our parties if the cops called. It was simple - the window to the back room was kept open at all times. That was it. That was the best we could do. Tommy, of course, mentioned throwing bimbos at them for distraction purposes. The idea had some merit, but it could only work for so long once the cops realized those girls were usually high off their rockers or, worse, prostitutes.

I pulled myself off of the steps. I needed to see.

And as if one cue - a police car darted passed me. It didn't even seem to have noticed me. A sigh of relief could be heard as I continued to walk down the sidewalk. People knew what I looked like. People knew that I hung around with Motley Crue. Tommy Lee, the extroverted fuck, had no problem saying where we lived to just about everyone. I was sure that Tommy knew at least one out of every four people that lived on the Sunset Strip. That's a lot of people.

A strand of my blue hair caught my attention. I tugged at it. It stood out so vibrantly. And then came the solemn realization of what had to change. They had likely been looking for a girl with blue hair. There was no mistaking who I was. I was practically a walking blueberry.

I saw the Motley house. The cops had gone but I was certain that they would linger far more than we liked them too. Mick must have thrown them off or something. He was a smart guy like that.

Or worse...They had all been arrested for drug possession.

Fear clenched my heart as I walked up the steps and opened the door. The living room was empty and I about cried at the sound of silence that seemed to echo. The only reason I didn't was because the silence ended within seconds.

"I can't believe you flushed all of the molly down!"

Nikki.

His voice caused me to smile. He didn't get arrested that was good.

"I'm sorry, man! I panicked."

And Tommy, too.

"You're fucking lucky, drummer. I can see the blow up your fucking nose."

And Vince wasn't even home. Everything was fine. Everything was fine. My boys hadn't been thrown in jail for something I had done or caused. I could still see pills, but I suppose the cops would be far more distracted by the number of beer bottles that had stacked up around the couch and on the table, along with the musical instruments that took up the front portion of our living room.

I shut the door behind me and the voices stopped.

"Nova!" Tommy came hurling in. "You didn't get busted!"

"Nope," I nodded my head. "They must've not been looking too hard."

"Yeah, kid - Considering you're as bright as a neon sign." Mick motioned. "It's a good look but I'll be damned if there isn't a single soul on the Sunset Strip that doesn't know you."

"I'm not that popular-"

"But you're fucking recognizable-" Nikki interrupted.

I sighed, my eyes falling downcast. "I know. But we can't afford wigs or new clothes. We can barely afford food."

"Wigs?" Nikki spoke, aghast.

My eyes widened up, horrified. I knew I had to change my look, but...Not permanently. Not with dye! "Hell, no!" I said. "I spent two hundred dollars to get my hair this color!"

"Two hundred dollars?" Tommy choked up. "Fuck, I forget you're fucking rich."

"I'm not rich - I just like to do things properly." I defended myself. I didn't want to tell them that my natural hair didn't take too well to dye itself and that it was heavily recommended that I simply go to a professional to get it done.

Nikki crept closer - Tommy following closely behind. They thought they were sly but I kept my eyes trained on them completely. I crept back to the door as devilish smirks formed on their faces. I could feel my hand on the knob and I quickly yanked it open only for a large hand to smack against it, slamming it shut.

"Mick!" I cried for help as they grabbed me by my arms.

He looked at me sadly. "The hair has to go, kid."

"No. Noo. Nooooooo!"

My screams could be heard as I was dragged into the bathroom.

...

It took an hour.

A single hour to strip away one of my most defining traits. My hair had been blue since I was fourteen years old when I managed to get explicit permission from my mother. I stared sadly into the mirror at the black mop of hair that seemed to stare just as intensely back at me.

"She loves it," Tommy pinched my cheek and I tried to bite him in response. He snatched his fingers away before I chow down. I hadn't struggled for long. It only took them tying me down to a chair - using the recently cleaned sheets which would have to be cleaned again. Black smudges were smeared all over them and my hair continued to drip dye.

Nikki roughed my hair up with a firm hand and gave a large, cheeky smile. "She looks just like us."

God, it was a breath-taking smile.

I could almost forgive him.

Almost.

It was true. I now had pierced ears and black hair. A good chunk of my closet consisted of leather and black. Granted, there wasn't a lot in my closet. Tommy, Vince, and I all had to share the one, tiny closet. Luckily, Tommy had found an old, abandoned chest in some dumpster and dumped his share out into it.

Unfolded - but I had yet to become my mother and thus didn't care.

"Untie me," I said sweetly.

"I don't know. I kind of like her like this. What about you, Tommy?" Nikki asked - his hands were still on me. They practically burned through my hair and clothes and into my skin. I did everything I could to not lean into his touch.

Tommy laughed. "I'll untie you - if you promise to not bite me."

I blinked and stared directly at him.

"I- promise."

"You're such a shitty liar," Nikki snorted.

"I am not!" I declared, huffing. "Just let me go. I've suffered enough. I had my ears pierced and now - now my hair."

"You pierced the other one," Nikki interjected, touching my ear with a calloused finger.

"Yeah. I did."

"I pity whoever you let do that to you." Nikki then mimicked my scream. It, of course, sounded nothing like my scream. I didn't sound half as whiny. Or, I didn't mean to, at least.

I sniffed. "Actually, it went down quite well. It turns out when I'm willing; it's a lot more fun for everyone. Linda was very gentle."

"Linda? That girl that you made out with the other night?" Nikki asked - his voice was ambiguous but I swear I could detect a slight hint of jealousy. Or perhaps that was just me dreaming?

"It wasn't making out. It was just a kiss." I attempted to shrug if not for the sheet-made rope holding me back into the chair. "Besides, it's none of your business."

"I think it is my business," Nikki spoke sharply.

"Nikki-" Tommy tried to interject.

Nikki continued on. "I don't know if you remember this or not, but you're my responsibility. Mine. And if you were to die out there-"

He carried on, but all my mind could focus on was the fact that the world had become ten degrees hotter. His? Since when did I become his? And why did I like the sound of that so fucking much? All I could stare at were his eyes and all I could feel were his hands. His eyes...They were darker green than my own.

"Are you even listening?"

I was honest.

"No."

There was a large rattling sound as Nikki slammed his hand against the sink. "You could stay tied up forever for all I care!" He walked out of the bathroom, slamming the door. "Shit!" I could hear him curse. The handle had broken off. We could see him toggling with it before he abruptly decided it wasn't worth it. We could hear the sound of the doorknob crashing into the wall.

I jolted and looked over at Tommy. He didn't seem to know what to say.

Being the charming fellow he was - he decided to untie me.

"Sorry, it got so serious," He replied uncomfortably.

"That's okay," I replied honestly, stretching out my arms. I ran my fingers through my damp hair. "It could have been worse."

"Yeah - it could have." Tommy rubbed at his face.

"What do you mean?" He had seemed so out-of-place by what had just occurred that I couldn't help but ask.

"If I'm being honest, it looked like you two wanted to fuck the shit out of each other."

I did.

Tommy was right on the money about that.

But Nikki?

It made my heart speed up, but the look on Tommy's face caused it to stop and throb painfully. He seemed disconcerted. I had almost forgotten about the fact that only a few days ago this man had confessed his love for me. I couldn't believe that I could be so selfish as to just brush it off.

Tommy deserved better than that.


	17. On With the Show by Motley Crue

That was the first time that the cops had come to Motley House but it certainly wouldn't be the last. The weeks passed on by and with them - performances and shows. Motley Crue was performing in a way they had never been before. We were still dirt poor, surviving on Tommy and Nikki's dicks.

It sounded crass but it was the truth. They essentially whored themselves out to girls for money, drugs, groceries. Of course, they didn't see it like that. Their girlfriends usually didn't notice me at first. I always tried to make myself blend into the background. Tommy and Nikki would usually just call me Mick's sister or niece or whatever family term they could come up with on the spot.

One time, Nikki had even called me his sister.

We were, frankly, anything but. Neither of us had made any moves on each other. I doubt Nikki ever would and I certainly wouldn't. I had decided that it was best I steer clear of the drugs and even the booze. No-Fun-Nova was back in business, much to the enjoyment of Tommy, who had been hoping to really see what I was like while high. I think part of him hoped that I would shove him up the wall as I did Nikki.

Motley Crue was becoming more than just a whisper of a band.

And because of that, the parties grew bigger and bigger and showed no signs of stopping. I tried to attend every show that I could, but there was a new idea dawning on me. The idea that I could get a job. Plenty of illegal immigrants could get a job - an under-the-table one, sure, but still - a little money was better than no money. The boys didn't notice it as much because they were always high on something, an appetite curber. Luckily, pot wasn't exactly their forte. Mick didn't have to worry about food, he didn't live in Motley House. He lived with a creature we called The Thing.

We had never met her, but we had seen the bruises. He was always honest about it, of course. "Where'd you get that bruise?" "Oh, just a scuffle between me and the Thing."

It was always quite nonchalant and of course, I didn't like it.

The idea of poor Mick being mistreated made my stomach churn. He was the nicest of us. I used to be, but even I was becoming jaded with people. I saw how people were in Los Angeles. Maybe it was because all of the women I knew were druggies, groupies, or I was just stuck in fucking Hollywood - but I was becoming...self-hating, in a way. The women here were fond of whoring themselves out. I wasn't fond of slut-shaming, but there was an acknowledgment to be had at the fact most of the women here truly did treat themselves as objects.

It was sad.

What was even worse is that I could understand it.

Nikki fucking Sixx was a lying, cheating, sleazy douchebag who cared for no one but himself. It shouldn't be attractive, but it was. I found myself, in frank terms, yearning for him constantly. My rational side always seemed to win.

Who knows how many STDs he had caught? Or if I would be getting fucked by a dick that had been stuck in a burrito? And who knows how long it had been since any of them had taken a shower. Although, I knew Vince and Mick did it quite regularly. Vince always smelled particularly nice. Granted, I doubted Lovey would let him get away with bad hygiene. She didn't seem the type.

Nikki always smelled of hairspray. It was an overpowering scent because he used hairspray more than he used drugs. That wasn't even an exaggeration. God, his hair. I could just tangle my hands in it. Honestly, I was beginning to think I was more attracted to his hair than I was to anything else about him.

But nonetheless, it was because of Nikki Sixx that I found myself back into the closet and unbuttoning a pair of jeans that Linda had bought me. The squeals of girls and boys who knew how to party could be heard through my thin layer of covering. I didn't want to be seen. One would think that masturbating during a party would be even riskier that masturbating truly alone.

It wasn't.

Not even close.

Not when you lived with two and a half (half being Vince occasionally) dudes. They were like dogs for sex. They could smell it before it even happened. I had no doubt that the moment I shoved my hands into my pants that one of them would wake up or they would burst in at just the wrong moment.

It was awkward for several reasons.

One, I had to seat myself at an odd angle.

Two, it was completely dark, aside from the brief lines of lights from the closet door.

Three, it had been a while.

It had been the longest I had ever gone without masturbating. I could even remember when I had my first ever orgasm. It was the week before my sixteenth birthday and it was like I had discovered a new toy. After that, I could honestly say I had an addiction to masturbation that I finally curbed about a week before I turned eighteen. How did I curb it? Boredom, mostly. I just grew...unexcited over it. I suppose I had done it too much in too little time.

It had been months, though.

And this time I had someone who was in my mind constantly and seemingly in real life even more so. I didn't love Nikki Sixx. Nope, nope, nope. I could at least admit that I was incredibly attracted to him in a way that I hadn't been with anyone else for a very long time. There was one guy in my junior year of high school who made me swoon at the sight of him, but I had never even talked to him before. That was about it. At least, that was all I wanted to think of.

But as I ran a finger down inside the lips of my vagina - I practically purred. It was like meeting an old friend, but definitely not like riding a bike. It was like my likes had changed and I was suddenly masturbating for the first time again. Trying to figure out what exactly it was that I was fond of.

I thought of roaming hands and black nail polish. I thought of my own hands wrangling into his hair, tugging on it, pulling on it hard because I knew he wouldn't mind the pain. Nikki had an incredible pain tolerance. I couldn't relate to that. I was unabashedly a pussy. I was cautious and a worrier. I had accidentally stabbed him in the eye with an eyeliner pencil more times than I can admit and at most, he would just laugh. It was almost admirable if he didn't use his tolerance to do things like set himself on fire. It was one of his party tricks he did to impress the gaggle of girls that would no doubt fuck him anyway.

I maneuvered my finger at just the right angle at my clit and a series of tingles shot through me. I let out a light huff but held my breath as soon as I realized. Just because I was confident that the party would overshadow my moans didn't mean that I wouldn't be cautious. It was always best to be cautious. It was kind of amazing really that I had held out for so long.

I was sensitive.

Very sensitive.

It wasn't exactly dry either.

Nikki Sixx made me horny.

A lot.

That was just common sense by now.

I clenched my eyes shut as I let my head fall back against the closet wall. Judging by the tightness building up in my stomach - I had found my rhythm. I even managed to straighten out some more as my hips lightly rolled. I thought of a few well-timed hip thrusts as I clung to Nikki's shoulders as our bodies were pressed tightly together.

"Nova," he whispered into my ear. "Nova. Nova."

"Nova."

And then all of a sudden it wasn't so imaginary.

Unfortunately, it wasn't Nikki at all. It was Mick.

I hadn't even noticed the closet door opening, letting all the light in. The blush rising on Mick's cheek was evident. His mouth was wide open. He had no idea what to say. And to be honest, neither did I.

I tore my hands out of my pants and quickly buttoned up my jeans.

"Did you need anything?" My words were rushed as fuck and it probably didn't sound like anything at all.

Mick didn't respond.

"I- I was just gonna tell whoever that was to get the fuck out and scram." That was the first time I had ever heard Mick stammer over his words. Ever. I was probably as red as a fire engine. I couldn't even look him in the eye. I was only thankful that he had no idea who I was thinking about. Although, if Tommy had seen how much I wanted to smash Nikki then...Mick had definitely seen it. I wasn't so sure about Vince. And considering Nikki had even tried to seduce me once.

He clearly knew about it to an extent.

A part of me hoped that he just thought himself as suave and charming and that he could get to me via seduction - no matter if I liked him or not. That part of myself was on constant repeat so that I didn't take it too seriously and so I didn't drop dead right there that instant. It was a survival mechanism.

There was a sudden cheer that went through out the room over. The door to the bedroom busted open. Vince looked at us with wide eyes and a smile on his face. "I got us a fucking manager, dudes!"

He continued to look at us.

It became clear that my shirt was half-way up and there was a burning blush on both of our cheeks. Nothing had happened, obviously, but it was only obvious to Mick and me.

"Oh-" Vince started. "My bad."

"No, no, no." I started. "Go on." I gave a weak smile.

We followed Vince out and into the living room where Stick (who was basically Mick's assistant) and his sister were sitting out. His sister wasn't much of a looker. That was...That was as nice as I could make it. She only had one tooth. She had been coming to rehearsal every so often, but this time, she had come to one of the performances and had even brought along her husband.

Nikki had been brushing off the flames from his jacket. Tommy had been making out with some girl. None of them had even seen the guy go up to Vince, much less convince him that it was a good idea. His wife or Stick's sister had been listing out all the good reasons as to why her husband should manage Motley Crue.

Nobody but Stick had known she was even married.

Allan Coffman was a rail-thin guy who owned a construction company. He had never worked in the music industry before. He had been there for the performance.

"You must be the guitar player!" Allan held out his hand to Mick. Reluctantly, Mick shook it. I'm pretty sure he had no idea what was even happening. "I'm Allan Coffman. I'd love to work with you boys. Ya'll have a great act going on. But it could be even better. It could be even bigger! Trust me!"

And trust him Motley Crue did.

I didn't have the heart to tell them that I had never even heard of Allan Coffman and that alone was giving me bad signals. To be fair, it could just be the fact that my masturbation session had been oh-so rudely interrupted - even if it had been on accident.


	18. Ruby Tuesday by the Rolling Stones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is literally the longest thing I've ever written. It makes me really proud. You have no idea. I've written something that's novel-length in less than seven days. That's pretty flipping awesome.

"What the fuck? You're leaving me here!"

Insanity.

Absolute betrayal.

"Allan wants us to go up north to practice for our live shows. Someone needs to keep an eye on the house." Nikki shrugged as he flexed his fingers, picking at the black nail-polish that coated them.

"It won't be so bad, Nova. You can clean the house some!"

I felt my eye twitch. The dork known as Tommy Lee remained oblivious.

"You can't just wash and dry my leather pants. You have to make sure to iron them-" Vince was already listing off all of his tedious requests as to how his beloved white leather pants were to be treated.

"Don't you have a girlfriend for that?" I sneered.

Vince sighed as I mentioned his girlfriend. "I'm trying to distance myself from Lovey. Also, I don't want her to know that I'm going up north...Because she'll follow us."

"Oh wow - Can't have that." I tssked. "No doubt, she'd find you balls-deep in some other chick."

Tommy snorted and both Nikki and Mick seemed amused. Even Vince managed to crack a smile at that. "You're not wrong." What a douche. They were all a bunch of douches. Except for Mick - although, I, personally, wouldn't care if he cheated on The Thing. There were just some people I had no sympathy for. But the thing is Mick would likely never cheat on the Thing because he was an overall decent guy.

I knew that it wouldn't be so bad living in the house by myself. I could actually clean it. I could also find the time to do other stuff - for example, finding a job. Hopefully someone somewhere would hire me. I could care less if it were two dollars an hour or three dollars. It didn't matter.

"Why do you even need me to do your laundry? You're going away. You need clothes." They gave amused looks towards each other. I closed my eyes and rubbed my hand against my forehead. It pounded back. "You're just going to wear what you have on for the next few weeks, aren't you?"

"Yep!" Tommy declared.

Mick snorted. "I got my own clothes - in the van."

Thank God, that there was at least one man who didn't act as if he were an actual animal. They had apparently already packed up their instruments and were ready to go. I had only learned of what they were doing that very morning.

At first, I was angry, but I grew used to the idea.

For some reason, that made Tommy regret his decision of leaving me alone.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Tommy had asked.

"Well, now that I'll know how that trailer will smell like. I'm good, thanks."

Tommy pouted but then opened his arms up for a hug. I ducked inside of his warm arms and hugged him tightly.

"Is there a phone number I can call?" I asked Mr. Coffman, who was standing by the door, checking his watch every now and then.

"Yes." He gave me the number. I had to write it down on a sheet of paper.

"Call me when you get there?" I cautiously asked Tommy.

"Sure thing!"

As soon as they left, though, I quickly pulled out my phone and placed it in. I couldn't trust myself not to accidentally throw it away. All of a sudden, I was alone at Motley House and it was one of the most eery feelings I could have ever conjured up.

There was no one but me and the bugs now.

I smirked as I scrolled through my list of music on my phone, plugged in my earbuds, and began to do what I had so vehemently complained about: clean. Of course, it wasn't deep cleaning. I didn't even have trash-bags. I simply gathered all of the bottles, pills, and empty hair dye boxes that I could find and placed them in one big circle. It ended up being about a foot tall.

The first thing I wanted to do was set fire to it. Of course, I didn't actually do that. I'm not Nikki...or Tommy for that matter. I also gathered all of the clothes I could find and distinctly sorted them into piles. It took me only two hours to gather it all. I would slowly bring it over to Mr. and Mrs. Bass's house - my only clothes going first because fuck those bastards for leaving me alone at Motley House while they went off partying in someplace in northern California.

The only place that really needed to be scrubbed clean was the bathroom. I stared at in silent horror as I opened the door. I had gotten much of the actual physical stuff. All that was left was the grime the residue dye. The bathtub was in a similar shape. There was so much hair.

For my own sanity, I shut the bathroom door and completely noped out on that job.

I only picked up the clothes and disposable cups in the rooms. Disturbingly enough, I didn't find a single pack of condoms. I shuddered at the thought of just how many girls those dudes have fucked without even the slightest bit of protection. It would be a miracle if they were clean. They mostly meaning Vince, Nikki, and Tommy.

Being the kind-hearted friend I am, I even sorted the make-up. There were dark red lipsticks, pale foundations, and even blush. Of course, there was a plethora of eyeliner and nail polish. I placed those in a separate pile on their own.

Running a hand through my hair, I knew I had to take a break.

Fuck cleaning.

The things I did for Motley fucking Crue.

It was tiring.

I pulled up the phone and dialed the only number I had memorized. Linda had remained a good friend. We kissed sometimes, but that's it. It was nice, pleasant, but Linda was that sort of girl. She was bubbly, free-spirited, and in a way, a remnant of the sixties. Fashionably, however, she was all the eighties. There was no doubt about that. She compared herself to Christie Brinkley - which I found was quite accurate.

"You remind me of Jean Shrimpton!" I didn't even know that was. "She was a model in the sixties. If you come over soon - I'll show you. I have pictures of her somewhere."

"How do you know so much about fashion?" I asked into the phone.

"My mother was a model. Not a very successful one, but she was beautiful nonetheless. I think she hoped I would pursue it, see. I very well could, but I don't think it's for me. I'd much rather be the one taking the pictures, I think."

It had been so long since I had an actual female friend. She was a partier but she still had a mind of her own. It was nice, refreshing, and I could never forget about Linda. Even if I was stuck up inside of myself, sometimes. "When would you like me to come over, Linda?"

"Anytime today, really. We could go out together - not out to a club. Just somewhere nice. Dinner is on me, of course."

"Oh, Linda - you don't have to..."

"But I'd love to. I always like to buy my friends things. It gives me a reason to spend cash without filling up my own home with junk I don't need."

"You have a shopping addiction," I sighed.

"Along with many others," she giggled. "But there is just something so satisfying about buying things and hell, I have plenty of cash."

"Linda, speaking of cash, I've been thinking of finding a job."

"A job? What for?" Linda spoke - practically horrified at the notion. "Hang on, dear. Before you say anymore - you must come over! And tonight we can go see a film or dinner or both!"

"What's on out?"

"I've been hearing interesting things about that film, Mommie Dearest. The one about Joan Crawford. Faye Dunaway is in it!"

I had heard of the movie myself in my lifetime. It had been hated by critics and was often criticized as to having a lack of realism. I remember that many of those opinions had changed as ideas of mental health and abuse were discussed a bit more in-depth in the twenty-first century. The over-the-top, dramatic personality was a common trait in narcissists. I had never seen it. I had wanted to, though.

"We should definitely go see it," I added. "I have a good feeling about it."

"Well, then meet me here. I bought some clothes that I thought would look good on you. None of that leather stuff, though. You have enough black and leather as it is."

"You've been dying to tell me that you bought me stuff," I remarked dryly.

"Yes! Yes, I have!" Linda laughed into the phone.

I had truly met a miracle of a friend.

"I'll be over within the hour." I murmured into the phone. "And I'll tell you everything that's happened today."

I had walked out in jeans and a t-shirt, swinging around the purse that I had finally fixed. Granted, it had been fixed with duck tape and not the glue I had originally planned for. It had my cards, my I.D, as well as my phone. I felt almost like myself again. Except my hair was now black and I was dressed in black. A pair of yellow earrings had been placed into my ears - the were thick and oval-shaped.

In another time - I would dress in pastels to contrast with my formerly blue hair.

Amazing at how things had changed.

I didn't dislike it, though.

I walked a lot more now that I lived on the Sunset Strip. There really was no need to drive. It was so different than the small-town life I was used to. It was a ten-minute walk to Linda's, but this time I stretched it into fifteen minutes. It was still so surreal - to be walking in 1981 to be walking around people whom I would never meet in my own time. I would never know their stories, their histories in my own time as I could now.

The door to Linda's apartment opened before I could even knock.

I smiled at seeing the bedraggled girl. She was still dressed in her silk robe and a slightly large t-shirt that she had worn to sleep. Her hair was unbrushed and the same wild, vibrant blonde that was no doubt that color due to constantly bleaching it.

"Hi!" She smiled sweetly, beckoning me in.

I closed the door behind me. "I have a lot to tell you," I said. "You're the first person I've told."

"Really? It must be important."

"Oh, very! The boys got a manager and they're away for a few weeks - to fix up their performances and make them even better than before."

"That's one step closer to getting a record deal!" Linda mirrored my excitement. "But away for weeks? That's really strange. Did he at least put out some cash?"

I rolled my eyes at the thought of cash. "Yes. He gave them fifty dollars...And they spent it on this giant ring of blow. They made it into a whole circle all across the table and took turns seeing how much they could snort."

"Boys," Linda sniffed. "Of course, they would."

"But they got some cool clothes out of it. They wore all of that with them, though. Can you believe they put me in charge of the house? As if I'm some house-wife. They expect me to actually clean."

"And did you?" Linda said with a knowing smile.

"I did some." I shrugged. "But the hell if I'm actually ironing their leather pants."

"Did they really say that?" Linda laugh-squealed.

"Yes! Absolutely ridiculous." I shook my head and half-flung myself onto her couch. It was much more comfortable than the one we had pushed into the apartment.

"And your hair..." Linda stroked a few strands, twisting the black ends around her finger-tips. "You dyed it?"

"Did I not mention that?"

"No. Not at all. I like it!"

"I may or may not have punched a waitress in the face. The cops came by once but they haven't come back yet. Nikki...and Tommy thought it would be a good idea to dye my hair." I tried not to sound salty over it.

"Well, the blue hair is one of your most...notable features." Linda agreed. "The black makes your face look different. It suits you."

"My inner thirteen year old would fall in love with those words." I laughed. "I had always wanted to dye it black but by the time I turned fourteen - I decided it had to be blue. In fact, in high school, about eighty percent of my wardrobe was blue."

"And the other twenty percent?" Linda questioned.

"Floral pastels."

"Oh my! I think we would've been great friends in high school."

"You think so?"

I couldn't think anymore opposite. I didn't like people like Linda. I couldn't stand parties. To think - I spent most of my nights in a club watching my friends get high. I would have been ashamed only a few months back.

"Well, if I had gone to high school. Real high school. I was privately tutored."

Of course, she was.

"You have to help me get ready, of course. For dinner and then a movie. Mommie Dearest, you said?"

"Yes!" I couldn't even hold back my excitement.

Linda then showed me the clothes she got me. There were more skirts, more sets of fishnet leggings, and even some shoes. "I kind of went on a boot craze, but you have the legs for it."

We walked out of the house well-dressed. I was in a velvet green crop top paired with one of the dark, denim skirts and of course, fishnet leggings and some black boots with a thick heel at the end. I kept my yellow earrings in. Linda let me borrow some bracelets that lined my wrists. I did my best to straighten my hair.

Linda had gone with a pink-sleeved shirt with buttons and lace. She also wore a jean skirt but it was far lighter in color. She wore a pair of kitten heels with it. I thought we looked so out of place in comparison with each other. I had grown used to the image I was expected to maintain while I walked the Sunset Strip.

We went and ate Chinese food.

It was nice enough.

It felt like a proper date.

Date.

I wondered if that's what Linda thought this was.

Perhaps it was just an outing between friends? I found that I wouldn't mind either-or. But a part of me knew it was wrong to lead Linda on (if that's what I was even doing) if I...felt a certain affection for a certain black-haired douchebag. And it certainly wasn't Tommy.

We then arrived at the cinema just in time to catch the next showing of "Mommie Dearest". It turned out to be a three-hour-long film. It was the last showing of the night. When we walked out of the theatre, it was nearing one in the morning.

"Wire hangers!" Linda giggled as she swung her hands out up around her head. She smiled next to me. She was high. I could tell, easily. Mostly because she had offered me some of the blow while we went to powder our noses. I had denied it, much to her chagrin. "I thought it was a very silly film." She decreed.

"Really?" I asked. "I loved it."

"I loved it, too. I just didn't take it seriously."

"I've dealt with a narcissist before. They're quite like that. Although, I do think some things are an exaggeration. But the fear that Christina felt around her mother. I think that was very real."

Linda poked at my cheek as she then twirled around on the side-walk. "You're always so serious, Nova."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"I think it is an...interesting thing. You have a lot of depth to you. And the more I look at you the more I do agree with my earlier statement. You really do embody Jean Shrimpton. You're just a bit more filled out."

"Filled out?"

"You know." Linda cupped outwards around her breasts.

I laughed, "I suppose I must be in that regard."

We soon made it back up to her apartment.

"Are you sure you don't want any?" She asked as she sprinkled and cut out a line of blow. "How about at least some champagne?"

"I'd love some." I agreed to that. Champagne couldn't do me any harm.

She got the bottle out and poured some into a wine glass. "Cheers!" She said as she clung her own glass against mine. I sipped on it - feeling the buzz go from my tongue and into my blood-stream.

"So...Why no more blow?" Linda wiggled her eyebrows. "Bad nosebleed?"

"...Just an accident." I shrugged.

"I do those, a lot." Linda giggled. "You gotta at least tell me."

"I kissed someone," I said tentatively, trusting her. I watched at her eyes, searching fr any sort of hurt or sadness, but she simply looked bemused, if anything.

Linda bit her lip, confused. "I'm not seeing the problem."

"Well, it was someone I wasn't supposed to kiss."

"Why not?" She asked curiously. Her eyes then widened. "Was it one of the boys in the band?" She then squeaked even without me having answered.

I nodded, "yeah. It was."

"Oh - man. Was it Tommy. He was a babe. I can't remember how he was with sex, but I could really-" She then trailed off as she narrowed her eyes, before a smile appeared madly on her face. She looked quite demented. "It wasn't Tommy, was it?"

"No, no, I don't really want to say..."

"You like him don't you? Whichever one it was?"

"I- What makes you say that?"

"Because you're redder than a watermelon."

"Watermelons are green," I interjected.

She shrugged. "Still. Makes enough sense for me."

Of course, she was right. I did like Nikki. I really, really, really liked Nikki. But she didn't need to know it was Nikki, explicitly.

"Was it Vince? He's cute, but blondes aren't really my thing. Also, I'd totally disapprove."

"What? What's wrong with Vince?"

"Uhhh...Helloo...As someone who had sex with him, I can assure you that the man..Well..he's not the best. He's good, charming, and all, but not the best. And you deserve the best." Linda playfully responded as though she hadn't just revealed something absolutely insane.

"You slept with Vince?" My voice raised in shock. "Literally, when!"

"Well, see, remember that night I gave you coke and then I just kind of left you. Well, I was getting fucked in the bathroom by, well, Vince. I came out and you were gone. So I left."

"That was the night-"

"So it definitely wasn't Vince." Linda interrupted. "Mick? Nikki! God, don't let it be Nikki."

I suddenly felt quite attacked and rather offended. I went shift-eyed as I asked, "why not Nikki?"

"He's hot, a right-proper babe, but he is a mess. At least, Tommy has a decent, sweet personality. It doesn't take a bright mind to know that Nikki has issues and that just spells trouble." Linda spoke quickly and I almost couldn't keep up. "And the last thing any girl needs in her life is trouble. Trust me. I've had my load of band-guys just like him and they're almost always the same."

Her blue eyes then softened as her hand grasped mine. "He ain't ever gonna love you until he learns to love himself."

"Good thing, I don't care for love," I spoke softly.

"Everyone cares for love - we're just not all as capable as expressing it," Linda spoke wisely for someone who was off her rocker. "And I knew it was Nikki. I knew you were the type to go after the guys who can't nor want to be saved."

It felt true.

It really did.

But I knew something Linda didn't.

I knew Nikki's future and I knew that, in the end, he would grow to love himself and I wanted that for him so badly that I knew that it was best that I just stayed out of the way. Clearly, however, those plans weren't really working out for me.

Linda then pulled me closer and kissed me softly on the lips. I pulled back, "if you know that I like Nikki - Why still kiss me?"

"Because he isn't gonna wait for you, Nova. He's a future rockstar or thinks he is, anyway. He's probably screwing some chick right now, coke up his nose, pills in his system, and you're the last thing on his mind."

The question came out before I could even stop it.

"How I do become the first?"

"I dunno. Put out."

Linda then went into a fit of laughter. I soon joined in, giving into the buzz that roamed my body and the delightful fog that spread into all crevices of my head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S. if the image doesn't show...I have no idea why.


	19. Without You by Motley Crue pt. 1

There was the smell of cleaning products in the air as I cleared away at the kitchen, drowning any insect I could see in bleach - that - or hitting them with the broom I had borrowed from Linda. It had been three days since the boys had left. I hadn't received a single phone call - aside from Linda, who had confirmed our plans for tonight. I was just going to come over to her house and we were going to do heaven know's what.

My plans to stay away from cocaine and alcohol had already collapsed.

To be fair, it was only eleven in the morning. It would be a miracle if any of them were even up. I sighed as I looked around the room. Linda had given me a few trash bags. Of course, we didn't even have a trash can outside our home. I had to stick the bags out in the back, but it was better than nothing.

Out of sight, out of mind.

Out of sight, out of mind.

I repeated that mantra as I actually cleaned a good hunk of the apartment. The fact I was really doing it was half-way appalling. Me? Cleaning? Those two words didn't belong together. The soft sounds of the Beatles played in the background. To think, I couldn't actually play the flipping Beatles when we were all together. It made me want to roll my eyes even thinking about it. The boys were such posers at times.

The first time I had mentioned them, of course, Mick had almost snorted.

His first band had been a Beatles cover band. I hadn't known that, so, of course, we had discussed our favorite songs. I was lucky. I didn't have to pretend that there were records of songs that didn't exist. The both of us mourned for John Lennon for about two seconds.

When the phone finally decided to ring - I jolted at least a foot in the air and made a grab for it.

"Hello?" I spoke tentatively.

"NOVA! It's so fucking good to hear your voice, dude. You have no idea." Tommy's loud, boisterous voice rang throughout the entire room as I held the phone away from my ear. Tommy was his own speakerphone.

"I told you to call me when you got there."

"I did!" He proclaimed. "You weren't available."

I sighed, "Fair enough. I was over at Linda's. We went to see a movie and ate dinner."

"-I'm talking to Nova-" I could hear Tommy say to someone in the background. "Oh? You're lady friend. Mick says 'hi'." There were some more sounds in the background. "Vince wanted to know if you ironed his pants out yet?"

"Tell Vince that I'm not fucking ironing anyone's goddamn pants." I rolled my eyes and kept myself from pinching at my nose. Tommy repeated what I said to Vince, likely.

"I'm not repeating that-" Tommy turned his attention back to me. "Anyway, Allan has already scored us a gig, but you should see the town! There's only one road."

"Sounds like my old town," I murmured. "Tell Nikki that I'm dumping all of the pills out."

"Okay-"

The phone was suddenly snatched away from Tommy.

"You better not-" Nikki growled into the phone.

"Nikki, give that back-"

There were a few bangs and a few groans of pain as well as the slamming of a door.

"If you do shit to my pills-" Nikki continued on.

"What the fuck just happened?" I interrupted.

There was a banging noise that I could hear.

"I locked myself in the bathroom." Nikki oozed with arrogance as he spoke. I could vividly see the smirk on his face as he held the wire through the underside of the door, stretching it as far as he could, his back turned against the door. "At least keep the molly and the-"

"I'm not keeping shit, Nikki. You left me here to fucking clean and I've been fucking cleaning. Do you know how many beer bottles we've collected...Over a hundred. It's been like two months since we moved into this shitty apartment. I didn't touch your shit inside your room. So don't fucking worry about it, but all the pills on the floor are going in the fucking trash."

He stayed silent. All of a sudden, I heard the bathroom door open and the phone was shoved back into Tommy's hand.

"What did you say to that asshole?" Tommy snorted.

"Just that I was throwing away all of his pills on the floor."

Tommy pouted and spoke, "I've been meaning to get to those."

"That's disgusting. Do you know many roaches probably fucked each other on that shit?"

"Well, when you put it that way-"

It was nice to speak to him again. I had missed him a lot. The apartment felt even worse when I was the only one in it. "Talk to me after your first gig, okay?" I asked as the hour passed on by without either of us really noticing.

"I will! I love you-" He stopped himself. "Sorry...You don't have to say it back."

I smiled softly. "I care for you too, Tommy. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

The phone hung up and I placed it back on the hook. I sighed. That had gone well. Luckily, Nikki didn't really have a choice in the matter as to whether or not I threw away the pills. I had already done that. I had also sorted all of the make-up and had placed it in neat lines in the bathroom. Did I manage to clean the mirror? Yes. Had it been one of the hardest things to do? Hell, yes. It had taken some serious elbow grease to get the dye to come off and even then there were still smears of it near the edges of the glass. I hadn't even bothered to clean the bath-tub.

There were a few good things about them being gone, after all. I didn't come home to the smell of booze and cigarettes. Instead, I was the one who came home smelling of it. Linda, like most people in the eighties, loved to smoke. I smiled at the thought of Linda. If we did date - I wouldn't mind. It would have to be relatively secret, of course. It was still the eighties.

That was one of the things about living on the Sunset Strip, or rather, Los Angeles or even Hollywood. All of the freaks came to live in California. That was simply a fact. Linda and I had never made it farther than a few kisses. Sometimes they grew deeper but in the end, she would either pass out or I would pull away. I liked her. She was good kissing practice, but at the end of the day, I knew she and I weren't meant to be together - not even for a long or short period of time. I just knew it. Our chemistry was that of friends and that of friends alone.

I was truly lucky to have found her.

Well, I was truly lucky that she and Tommy had decided to screw each other.

I should've known that my luck would run out eventually.

The phone rang but when I picked it up - nobody responded, there was simply an awful gargling sound. "Hello?" I called out again. The gargling sound continued. It sounded like someone was choking. I placed the phone back down on the hook.

I knew it couldn't have been one of the boys.

Mick kept a close eye on them. Even if he wasn't, there was always someone that was at least sober enough to help them if they needed it. Who would call Motley house? I clenched my eyes shut as I tried to think.

There was only one other person and at the thought of her, my blood ran cold. I didn't even bother to lock the door when I left the apartment in a hurry. I practically ran down the sidewalk as I tried to make it to Linda's house as fast as I could. My legs were burning. I never ran. Ever. I always had this horrible fear that I looked like an idiot. I'm sure at that moment, I did.

People looked at me like I was some of psycho when I pushed past them. I'm sure they thought I was up to no good - judgmental bastards. I saw her apartment steps and I ran up them and banged my fists on the door.

Nobody answered because I was a fucking idiot.

I toggled at the doorknob and found the apartment unlocked.

Linda didn't have any fear like that.

I pushed it open and found myself prancing around the house - looking for the horror scene. I found it in her sitting room. She was on the floor, her hands clenched up on her chest, as the phone was sat beside her. She was letting out painful wheezes. Those same sounds that I had heard on the phone.

"Linda!" I collapsed on the floor beside her and grabbed for the phone. I dialed 911. It was a wonder why she hadn't called them first. She shook her head and tried grabbing for me, but I think it was too painful because she only managed to fall against me. It didn't matter anyway, by the time the emergency services arrived, it was too late.

Linda had stopped moving. She had stopped breathing and all I could do was stare helplessly. The paramedics had arrived only a few moments after. They had let me ride in the back of the ambulance, on our way to the hospital, but it was of no use.

Cardiac arrest, they had said, from overdosing on cocaine.

The horrible thing was is that I had gone back to her apartment afterwords and learned more than I learned more about Linda is those few moments of somber silence than I did in the weeks upon weeks I had known her. I wasn't one to demand answers or ask endless amounts of questions in regard to a person's personal story.

Her father had been a rather famous artist who had died via suicide when she turned ten. Her mother had been a model, not a very popular one, that was true. She was alive, though. I found her number but when I called, all she had to say was, "Good riddance."

I didn't even get the chance to tell her to fuck off before she hung up.

I knew Linda's drug problems were bad but I had never judged her for it.

I had found needles - cocaine. Not smack, luckily. I imagine she had done one injection too many, hence the overdose and the dying bit. I think when I did...I couldn't even touch the syringe. I felt violently ill just from the look of it.

My head pounded and there were black spots dancing in my vision. I passed out in her sitting room - the same place where Linda had died. Unfortunately, unlike in the movies, people don't pass out for long. I would've gladly preferred to wake up the day after and be able to pretend that for just a moment - it was all a dream.

Instead, I did what I knew what Linda would want me to do.

I packed up her stuff. Her shoes, her jewels, and her photographs. She had a notebook of fashion designs, and a polaroid (as well as a polaroid box filled with photos of naked, drugged out people - some of them being herself). I knew the last thing she would want to do was let her mother touch her stuff. Not from the way her mother reacted at least. Her mother could have the apartment with the syringes where the cocaine lingered, as well as the spoiled milk in the fridge.

As far as Linda let me be aware - I was one of her few female friends. The rest were groupies, drug buddies, or dudes that thought they made good music. Sometimes they did, sometimes they didn't. I recognized one of the dudes in about two of the photos to be Gene Simmons. He didn't look drugged out though.

I took everything I knew she would've wanted me to take.

I felt like a vulture.

I was a vulture.

I managed to transfer the boxes of stuff to the apartment over the course of a few days. I didn't answer any phone calls during that time - of which there were two. I felt nothing during the day. At night, I cried constantly. Never had I ever considered the idea of death to be scary. But never had I ever considered the idea that I might die young.

And you know what's even worse?

It still didn't keep me from snorting a bit of cocaine. I should've never done it in the first place. I wasn't the outlier. I wasn't anything or anyone special. Just because I was a time traveler didn't mean I couldn't become addicted to things and yes - in those few weeks that Motley Crue would spend away from the Motley House - I became hopelessly addicted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :(


	20. Without You by Motley Crue pt. 2

"Dammit," Tommy slammed down the phone back into it's case. He looked at Mick, Nikki, and Vince who were respectively lounging around the tiny trailer that Allan had loaned to them. "She didn't pick up."

"Again?" Mick asked, his fingers absently strumming away to a guitar that wasn't there. As stoic as he often came across, even he held a glint of concern in his eyes. The kid, otherwise known as Nova, was probably the second most sane of their motley bunch. The first being himself, of course. Mick could probably give the third place to Vince. He used to tie with Tommy, but it was clear that the more Tommy was exposed to Nikki, the more Tommy and Nikki grew more alike.

Nikki was easily the most fucked up of them all. Mick had been in the business for longer than all of them. He wasn't yet thirty - not even close, but most days, he felt like he was going on sixty instead. His back ached and ached and ached and he knew it would never fucking stop. But still, he played, because it was better to have a passion than no passion at all.

"Again," Tommy repeated. He frowned. "Does she not like us anymore or something?"

"Could have gone home," Vince suggested. "Maybe she's back in the future?"

"Not possible," Nikki stated with utmost certainty.

"How would you know?" Vince asked, running a hand through his ultra blonde hair.

"I just do," Nikki stated. "She hasn't answered my question."

"Do we even know for sure that's how we send her home?" Mick scoffed. "She could just be stuck here forever."

"Then why is she not answering?" Tommy retained the worried look on his face. It was rare to see someone like Tommy be so serious. It simply wasn't right. Even when their faces had been beaten bloody - Tommy always managed to smile.

Their manager was shit.

Mick knew it, but didn't say it. He had been unsure, at first. Allan was a friendly enough guy and he knew more about business than the rest of them. Unfortunately, he knew fuck all about music. He didn't even know the difference between a bass guitar and a regular, electric guitar. Already, he was trying to market them to the wrong type of people. He had them in this tiny, shitty town in northern California.

The last thing the town wanted was a group of dudes in six-inch heels, leather, and make-up slathered on their faces. They looked like the town prostitutes, which was normally an appreciated look in Los Angeles, but here, they were nothing but clowns. Their first gig? It was a fucking joke of a show. They had tried to play "Live Wire", staring down at a group of straight edge kids who were dressed in cowboy suits, but they had received nothing but blank stares. Instead, they had been forced to resort to Elvis and the Beatles to get even the slightest reaction.

It had been a shitty show and Mick had relished the feeling when it had been over. He had opened a bottle of vodka and had proceeded to practically down the whole thing. Nevertheless, the rest of the band still seemed to retain hope in Allan.

It didn't help of course that Vince had managed to start a brawl at their second show. No, no, it had been after they had played, but they had still lingered around. There had been a few pretty women there. Except, they weren't really women at all. It ended up being a bunch of transvestites who thought they could swindle Vince by giving him baby powder instead of cocaine.

Vince had stormed out of the bathroom, needle practically still in his arm.

"What the fuck did you give me?" He had screamed at one transvestite. He had then reared his hand back, formed it into a fist, and broke the transvestite's nose. It had been akin to a bloodbath from there on out. Mick hadn't even tried to step foot into that mess, of course. He had stayed in his corner trying to get drunk out of his mind.

Nikki and Tommy, however, had joined in enthusiastically. Unfortunately, the odds had not been in their favor. It was only when the bouncers escorted Motley Crue from the building did they stop fighting. Mick hadn't been bothered of course, but he still went out after them anyway. The last thing they needed was Tommy, Nikki, and Vince running around and destroying whatever they felt like.

Mick did ponder on the suggestion that perhaps Nova had grown tired of their lifestyle. He couldn't blame her for it. Especially since she was bug-eyed over Nikki. She was a smart girl. She had to know that she was worth more than a guy like Nikki. But, stuff like this always failed to surprise Mick. He refused to let it. Of course, Nikki did do something that managed to catch him off guard. Mick refused to classify that particular thing as a surprise. The night - the night where they learned that Nova had finally gone off into the deep end, just a little bit at least, Nikki had restrained himself.

It was rare.

Had she been some other chick - Mick had no doubt that Nikki would've fucked her without a care in the world. Perhaps, Nova wasn't the only one with those feelings? Mick despised the idea of ever bringing his mental ramblings into a real-life conversation. He hated emotional talks. He especially hated the idea of he and Nikki having an emotional talk. They couldn't be more different.

He glanced at Tommy. He wishes he could feel sympathy for the Drummer, but Tommy had a habit of falling in love with everyone. He still proclaimed his love for the girlfriend he was still with - the one that was fond of ruining the carpet? Mick forgot her name. He knew the Drummer fancied himself in love with the Kid. That was obvious. Mick supposed that Tommy definitely thought he loved her.

And maybe in another world, he could really, truly love her.

But they were on the pathway to be rockstars.

The last thing they needed in any of their lives was love.

Mick doubted that Tommy was capable of separating the two. He didn't see the problem with fucking other chicks while still being in a relationship. Chicks usually didn't dig it. Mick, himself, didn't dig it. He knew that if he strayed even a little bit from the Thing. She'd beat some sense into him - literally.

"I think I need to go down there...To check on her," Tommy stated.

"We have that radio interview today," Vince stated. "Allan expects us to be there-" He checked his watch. "-Right around now."

And that was how they spurred into action, getting ready, brushing their hands through their hair and loading into Tommy's van. Mick knew that the Drummer was still in deep thought.

"She's probably fine, Drummer." Mick lied as he patted Tommy's shoulder. He knew that it was incredibly out of character for Nova to answer the phone. She may have gone home - not on purpose, clearly. He knew that if she had gone. It would be a saddening moment for them all. Mick liked to think that even Nikki would be upset by it.

"Probably," Tommy said weakly.

They arrived at the radio interview looking quite the horrific sight.

"Are those real?" The interviewer motioned at their bruised eyes and busted lips.

"Yep!" Tommy attempted to smile widely. "Got them just last night."

"These are our guests Motley Crue, an up-and-coming rock band whose popularity is rising out on the Sunset Strip. Now, introduce yourselves to our viewers listening." The interviewer began. It was a woman. So, obviously, over the course of the interview, the goal was to fluster her as much as possible.

"Now, do any of you have any special ladies out in your life right now? Wife? Girlfriend?"

It was such an obvious question that none of them answered. Not even Mick. He wondered if Tommy had been dying to say, Nova? The show ended soon - having only lasted about forty-five minutes. It didn't take long for the whole group (sans Mick) to make their rounds with the interviewer off in some closet.

They didn't fuck her at once.

Although, Mick was sure they would do it eventually because they really were a pack of wild animals. He wondered how that woman could stand the stench. He barely could and he was just as filthy.

The subject of going back down to check on her came up again.

"I think I should go," Tommy mentioned again. "I really do."

"I'll go with you," Mick stated. He didn't want the Drummer doing anything stupid while he was down there. For example, if she had gone, Tommy could have a meltdown. He didn't seem the type, but the last thing they needed was a missing drummer.

"The both of you should stay here," Nikki stated. "I'll go."

"What gives you the right to go?" Tommy snorted, glaring at Nikki.

"She's my responsibility."

"You're the one who suggested we leave her there," Tommy retorted.

"With the expectation that she would fucking answer our phone calls."

"It's my van."

"That's my apartment."

It turned into a pissing contest.

"We can all just go?" Vince suggested - both Tommy and Nikki turned to glare at him. How dare he make a reasonable solution.

"We need someone here to explain to Allan where we've gone," Nikki replied. They all looked at Mick, who looked at Vince, who looked right back at Mick.

"No," Mick stated. "I'm not being left behind on this one. I don't trust either of you to react well to if- if Nova is gone."

And that's how Vince was left in the trailer to explain to their frantic manager as to where they had all gone. It was an eight-hour drive - there and back, which wasn't so bad when there were three able-bodied drivers.

None of them expected it.

None of them expected to come home to an apartment that was quite neat. Mick had forgotten there was an actual carpet. There weren't any cigarettes smashed into it nor were there beer bottles laying around. Sure enough, across the front door, there were a few baskets of neatly folded clothes. There was the faint scent of lemon in the air. As much as Nova hated it - she had done well.

It was the silence that echoed, that twisted their brains, and messed with their hearts. It was early in the morning, to be fair - they had driven all night. So Tommy placed a smile on his face. The scent of the cleaner, the folded clothes - it all seemed to scream that she was there. As he darted into their shared room, though, the door fell open with a creak. All three of them piled to see the second bedroom stuffed with stuff.

There were bottles of alcohol, completely drained of their contents, strewn across the floor. Mick could see polaroid pictures of naked girls. Most of them consisted of one naked girl in particular. Linda.

More importantly - there were lines of cocaine not yet snorted and a half-emptied bag that looked to be as big as a mini-fridge. The body in the bed was bedraggled. The girl in it was completely naked and her hair was one big rat's nest. Ignoring the state of her nudity, Mick managed to stumble past Tommy and went straight for her pulse. She was alive. He let out a sigh of relief. He straightened the sheet on her, covering her completely from the view of both Nikki and Tommy, before walking back towards the door - grabbing at Nikki's shoulder and shoving him back into the entranceway.

Tommy hadn't even moved from it. His mouth was agape and his eyes were wide. He was in complete shock. Mick shut the door, but Tommy still didn't move away from it. Nikki managed to voice their concerns completely.

"What. The. Fuck."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm loving the 3rd P.O.V. format but dont worry. It isn't permanent. I'll either go back to it next chapter or the chapter after that.


	21. Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd

The lights to the room were turned on.

I couldn't remember being the one to turn them on. Granted, I didn't remember much. I woke up entangled in sheets - naked. I could briefly remember throwing my clothes off in a fit of pure, unadulterated heat. I remember sweating and turning and my heart doing-flip-flops but not in a way that was entirely unpleasant.

I couldn't even remember going to sleep.

It had been about a week and a half since the death of Linda. I hadn't gone off to the deep end at the beginning of it all. It was the shock, I think, it kept me from doing much aside from transferring a lot of Linda's stuff into the apartment. There were no clothes packed as tightly as they could be in the tiny closet. There were now shoes that outlined the walls and bed.

As I sat up in the bed, I eyed the giant sack of cocaine that was left on the floor. To think, Linda had all of that blow and she still bought it from people at the clubs. She was quite forgetful. She had been, at least. Sometimes she sold it, but I knew she always liked to have cocaine to spare. I didn't think it had been that much, though. I also hadn't realized just how powerful the coke could be. I hadn't slept for days. Inevitably, I had crashed.

I glanced around at the floor. I let the sheet fall some as I knelt down onto the ground and began to gather the polaroid pictures back up. When had I even taken them out of the box? I filed them into a stack and placed them on the bedside table. No longer was I drowning in the heat so I opted to put on one the pink, silk bathrobe that I had taken for myself. Linda had been quite fond of it. I was half-disgusted with myself. I had even taken the contents out of her fridge and lined them in our own. We would have food for weeks - well - I would. Not that much of it would get eaten. We now had blow for days.

The boys had left me.

I had no idea when they would be back. I wasn't even sure if they would be back. They probably left, became rockstars, and never returned to our shitty apartment. Something to that measure, at least. I truly was all alone.

Linda...Linda was gone and even though I had most of her stuff - it wouldn't bring her back. This was it. She was the closest thing to an actual friend that I had on the Sunset Strip - other than the boys, but they didn't count. They had to befriend me, after all. Who wouldn't want to keep in contact with the time traveler? Time traveler...I clenched my fists as I rubbed one of them against my eye. They were so sore and so horribly tired. I had cried endlessly until I thought I could cry no more.

I still wasn't over it.

I still didn't know if I would be over it.

The few times I did sleep - her death haunted my dreams. All I could hear was the awful rasping sound of her gagging, of her own body refusing to cooperate. I stumbled towards the door - I was barely able to keep my step as I aimed my body at the side of it. My fingers shook as they tugged at the doorknob almost helplessly. I couldn't remember the last time I drank anything.

Maybe if I were focused on anything but myself - I would've heard voices, but I didn't and I continued to stumble my way into the short hallway. I kept my eyes aimed at my feet. They felt half-way asleep. I was curious as to how long I had slept for exactly, but I knew something like that wouldn't get answered.

"You're awake!" A loud voice rang out.

I almost jolted, but the voice barely seemed to register. Nonetheless, I picked my eyes up off the floor and glanced at the men in front of me - two of them were still practically boys. I wanted to respond. I really, truly did, but all I could do was stare.

"You look like shit, kid." Mick pointed out from his place on the couch. To the left, in the kitchen area, Nikki was speaking on the phone, presumably to their manager.

Tommy was looking at me, his lips pursed in concern, as he frantically shoved his leg up-and-down. I noted his eyes kept flickering down at my loosely tied bathrobe. It revealed far more of my chest than what I normally would let it. But things like shame and humiliation - they were null and void at the time being. "You didn't answer our calls," Tommy said, his eyes were demanding an answer. It was an answer I couldn't dare give him. Not yet.

I tried to walk forward just a bit too quickly. Of course, I stumbled. Tommy jumped up to steady me, his warm hands on my arms. I clenched my fists as I wrung my hands in his shirt and ducked my head against his chest. "Nova?" He asked, but I didn't say anything. I just clung to him like a monkey would a tree. I could hear his heartbeat. I couldn't bear the idea of one day losing him too.

I don't even know how I managed it.

It took about half-an-hour to finally explain to them what had happened.

"Linda she-she died," I finally spoke for the first time I had in days. My voice was scratchy and rough, from the lack of water, which I still had not drunk. "Cocaine overdose."

"I'm so fucking sorry," Tommy said. "I know you really liked her, man."

"She was one of my first friends," I murmured numbly. I was still pressed into Tommy's chest. "She wanted to be a photographer."

"That explains the photos," Mick stated as he crossed his legs. "Frankly with the amount of blow in your room, I'm surprised you didn't overdose with her." 

My arms shook. I know Mick meant well. "I only did a little bit." 

"That explains you being asleep then," Tommy said. "Man, I can never sleep with that shit." 

"Neither can I," I shrugged. "But I was up for days." 

Both Tommy and Mick went silent. 

Nikki had soon stopped talking on the phone and he hung it up. He walked into the living room with the rest of them and stared hard at Nova. "You should've fucking called."

"Excuse me?" Nova reared her head. "Maybe you bastards shouldn't have left me."

"I trusted you to keep yourself well," He said hardly.

"I'm not your fucking house-wife," Nova clenched her fists and got up, staring up at him. He wasn't his usual giant self. He didn't have his boots on. He was still a good four or five inches taller than her. She hated knowing that for over a week-and-half she had felt nothing but all Nikki had to do was simply waltz back into the apartment and there would be explosions going off in her head.

Lust.

Anger.

Happiness.

Love.

Sadness.

Those all seemed to explode and form into one, big emotional nuke that was teetering over the edge of her control. Nova couldn't tell if she wanted to kiss him, punch him, or both.

"I know you're not a fucking house-wife," Nikki spat out. "But I didn't expect you to be like a fucking dog, either! We're gone for what, two weeks, and already we can't expect you to not have some sort of meltdown."

"Nikki-" Mick tried to interject.

"Stay out of this, Mick!" Nikki spoke back. Mick looked down. As strong he wanted to be and as strong as was, Mick hated conflict.

"C'mon man, her friend just died-" Tommy gained some sort of courage but the look Nikki shot him made him go quiet. Nikki was scary when he was angry. He was the type of dude who could set himself on fire and not give a shit.

I couldn't even feel myself. That's how infuriated I was. It was as though it was an out-of-body experience. "Fuck you, Nikki. I'm not a fucking dog." I screamed. "I didn't fucking ask to be here. You asked me to be here. I just want to go fucking home. I don't want to be here anymore."

It seemed like that was the last thing either of them had expected me to say, but it was said and there was nothing to stop the gates from unleashing the tears that poured from my eyes. Sad tears, angry tears. It didn't matter. I stared through them, right into his beautiful green eyes, and said: "You want to fucking know if you'll be successful? I'll fucking tell you!"

"Nova..." Tommy's hand gripped my arm as he tried to tug me back down towards him, to try and stop me from leaving. I refused it though and yanked my hand back. He was hurt. There was no doubt about it as I watched his eyes widen up.

I looked back at Nikki, who had remained silent, as he watched cautiously. "Go on. Say it then," He finally said.

"You really wanna know? You're gonna make millions, Nikki. Fucking millions. You're gonna fuck some many groupies that sooner or later pussy is just gonna feel the same - no matter who it is. And don't get me started on the drugs," I laughed sardonically. I curbed myself from saying too many details.

It felt so good to finally say it, but he didn't even seem shocked. Why would he? It was Nikki. He knew it all along. I squeezed my eyes shut as I tried to will myself away. I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to be in that apartment anymore. I wanted to see my mom. I wanted to see my grandma. Hell, I wanted to see my brothers. All five of them. My nerves were shot and electricity ran up and down my veins.

But I opened my eyes...And nothing had changed.

They had been expecting it too. They had been expecting me to just disappear into thin air. All of a sudden, I felt the familiar urge to puke and faint at the same time. I collapsed to my knees, my hands on the floor before me, as I held back the vomit threatening to spew.

Tommy was by my side, pulling me close to him.

"I can't go home," I murmured endlessly as I pushed away nausea. "It didn't work." I cried - my tears falling onto his skin as I shook and shuddered and wept.

There was the slamming of a door. Nikki had gone into his room.

"It's okay," Tommy said, "You have me."

And that I did.

But of course, I knew it wasn't enough.

It would never be enough.

I continued to cling to him anyways. It was in that moment of emotional insecurity that I whispered something that would haunt just as much as Linda's death would. "I love you too, Tommy."

Tommy clenched his arms around me even tighter.

And for a split second, those three cursed words did make me feel a bit safer.


	22. Girl by the Beatles

The Kid had been broken.

That much was obvious. If not by the way she no longer laughed nor smiled. In fact, for the past few days, she had stuffed in her ear-buds and had spoken not a word to anyone, aside from Tommy. Even then, it never went higher than a whisper. The two of them had become practically inseparable for the few days that they had been home in Los Angeles.

It was unfair to the Drummer.

This much Mick knew.

They had all seen the way that Nikki and Nova had looked at each other. The way that the two of them always seemed to be on edge, practically two seconds away from fucking each other if not for there always be an audience.

Mick took a swig of vodka. He no longer grimaced at the taste or the burn. He drank more vodka than he did water. He glanced down at the two of them, Tommy and Nova. She clung to the Drummer's arm, her head ducked into the crevice of his shoulder. The way he looked at her made it all the more painful for even Mick. This was his band - their band - he hated the idea of something like this tearing them apart.

She was in grief.

People in grief did weird, stupid shit.

Unfortunately, the Drummer...he was too much of a dumb kid to understand what he was getting into. It seemed silly for the guy to think that one moment she didn't have feelings for him and then the next she did. Of course, there was always a chance that Nova had been lying to herself as much she had been lying to Tommy.

She cared for Tommy, obviously.

She had even gone as far as to friend-zone him.

Mick wasn't an expert on relationships. And he definitely wasn't an expert on women. He knew that they were complicated creatures. He still felt wrong standing idly by, however, when he saw her duck down and snort a fine, white line of dust and then proceed to smack a big kiss on Tommy's lips. This was wrong. She had been an innocent girl when she had come here. It had only been a few months and already Motley Crue had destroyed her, only to re-invent her.

Eventually, it was decided that they were ready. They were ready to hit the Sunset Strip again. Mick kept an eye on her and the Drummer. He did so for all of the members of the group. Even when they thought nobody was watching. This was the closest Mick had been to success and he had been in the game for what felt like a lifetime already.

But he also kept an eye on Nikki.

That boy had a habit of always going too far.

In regards to Nikki and Nova, it took two to tango.

The moment it had become clear that Nova and Tommy were becoming something more than just friends...Nikki thought he was slick, but Mick knew. Mick knew that Nikki was and always would be darker than the rest of them. That's just how Nikki was. He could see it in the way that Nikki looked at the pair of them. The jealousy and possessiveness...An unhealthy fixation.

It had been like that before, even if Nova had never noticed it.

But everyone else had.

There was no way they hadn't.

Nikki was a piece of shit, but the fact he hadn't kicked her to the curb spoke thousands. Instead of forcing her to throw out of all of her dead friend's shit - they had made room and now their punk-rock house always held the lingering scent of vanilla or lavender or whatever girly spray managed to get sprayed first.

Of course, they kept in the rooms.

They were still Motley Crue and if their living room didn't have a plethora of booze and drugs, then that meant they had become pussies. Motley Crue was definitely not a bunch of pussies. They did things by the extreme.

Mick had been leaning against the counter, looking at Tommy and Nova every-so-often. He probably should've been looking at Nikki because the boy had a habit of nearly burning their house down. There was some kid causing up a scene. Mick looked at him. He was a kid with greasy, red hair and a clip-on-earing and he was currently being a little punk twerp to some of the girls across the room. Nikki had seen this, of course, and had gone straight into a frenzy. It was bound to happen, eventually.

"You ain't punk, motherfucker!" Nikki yelled as he tore the boy away from the girls and pushed him down against the table. He made all of them watch as he hammered a nail through the boy's earlobe and into the table. "Now you're punk rock!" Nikki spat with a nasty grin adorning his face.

Not even Mick bothered to help him. Instead, Mick turned up the stereo so they could tune out the boy's cries of pain. He glanced back at Nova. Her empty gaze staring right back up at him. He could see it. She was still there, somewhere, and Mick knew she was utterly horrified beneath her apathetic act.

She didn't do anything, though.

She continued to cling to Tommy.

Nikki would occasionally glance at both of them. Mick could only imagine what was going through his mind. He had a feeling it went something like, "Mine, mine, mine", but that was only a guess. He was personally surprised that the boy had yet to have a full-on fight with Nova over it.

Not that it would be much of a fight.

Nova hadn't been putting those up as of late.

She was too high or too drunk - just out of it.

Mick had a horrible feeling that one day they were going to wake up and Nova was going to be dead from the same way her friend, Linda, had gone.

That would be a real tragedy.

He wanted to stop it. He really did, but he knew that even if he tried to waste his time - It would just come back to punch him in the face. He had known people like Nova. Good kids who lost themselves - and it was up to them to bring themselves back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to apologize for the shortness of this chapter. However, it took me ages to get even there. The moment I finished writing chapter 21 - I had to take a deep breath. Honestly, the way I see it, chapters 1-21 were more like Season 1. And this is the start of season 2. I have so many plans for this "season". Getting there is a problem. I found it fitting that the chapter is in Mick's POV. It isn't going to be a permanent thing and chances are this is the only one like that. I'm really excited that I pushed through though because as I said - I have a LOT of plans after this.
> 
> Also, shoutout to What The Fork? By Cluttered Mindspace! Not gonna lie - I was totally tempted to use Harry Potter in this (in later chapters) as some sort of world-traveling/time-traveling gimmick. Still might do that! But I got tripped up when i saw she/he recently that. Honestly, loving this time-travel stuff. I myself was inspired by a story I found on Wattpad (which was honestly SO good - I'll try and remember the title!)


	23. She's So Cold by The Rolling Stones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I may have a lowkey obsession with the Rolling Stones. JUST LOWKEY THO. I went back and changed all the tiles into song-titles. I'm not ashamed. This is like the fifth one with a Rolling Stones title.

The eighties were an era of absolute decadence - a never-ending party. This was especially true for Motley Crue but as soon as they hit the stages once more on the Sunset Trip - few bands could rival the sheer hedonism.

I had my arm, clutched to Tommy's as we walked the Sunset Strip. Our heels clicked onto the pavement. We looked like a bunch of giant hookers. Well, aside from me. I looked like a spectator who was getting a bit too handsy with one of the circus clowns. Tommy was like a giant, already, without the heels, he stood over six foot, but the giant stilettos were making him look like a goddamn beast.

We were not a couple.

It wasn't confirmed.

He was still with Jessica.

He hadn't mentioned her in days. I doubt he had seen her in days, either, but it still counted. I had to repeat these three things every time I pulled a glance over at Nikki, who always seemed to take my breath away. It made me feel absolutely wicked, but at the same time, I could only cling to Tommy's arm even harder.

I was a sucker.

A loser.

A whore.

How could I play with Tommy's feelings? How could I do such a thing like that to someone who had been nothing but kind and loving towards me? Surely, he must have known that those three cursed words were said in grief in nothing more! But, perhaps they hadn't? After all, I had said them and when he flashed me one of his wide, dorky smiles...I certainly felt something.

It wasn't love. I knew that much. I had never felt love in my life. I had no idea what it even felt like. I knew for a fact that I would know love as soon as I felt it. I just - I just would know, you know?

Our posters clung to every poster board, to every street post, and anyplace we could hang up flyers and hoped the owners of the buildings wouldn't notice. We were on our way to a club. It was two stories tall and infamously called the Whisky. We had been there before, but we mostly relied on the Starwood outside of performances. It certainly helped that Nikki worked there. He was practically a janitor of the place, but his boss had been gleaming and treating him quite nicely since Motley Crue was keeping it packed every other weekend and then some. Groupies would apparently linger by the bars, watching Nikki work.

This was all based on Nikki's word, but not even I doubted him.

There were days where I wanted to do the same.

I don't know why I threw myself into cocaine as I did. I knew the consequences and I even know that at the end of the day - Linda would still be dead and I would be nothing but a druggie, but it was something. I needed something to throw myself into. She was the first to get me to snort it - it was only fitting that I kept up the hobby in her honor. Of course, it had become less of a hobby and more of a lifestyle.

Tommy had been all too happy to share it.

He didn't judge me.

He was there. He was my rock now that Linda was gone.

We had shared a few cuddles, a few kisses, a few laughs, and a few lines. It was almost like Linda had never gone, but, Tommy was distinctly different. He smelled different, for one. He smelled like a member of Motley Crue - of sweat, booze, and cigarettes.

The club was far from new to us.

Not that it mattered. Every club was the same in my eyes. Noisy, loud, and there were too many people. But the Motley Crue image mattered. It mattered more than I did. I had been so completely out of it that I hadn't even fought with Nikki over it. Only a few weeks back, back when I was normal and sane and believed that I could return home, he had been dragging me for every outfit I stepped out in.

Now, he didn't even do that.

Or, if he did, I tuned it out without even a single response.

I yearned for him, while at the same time, had begun to resent him. He brought me here and I had no way back. None that I could see. Either he lied about the ritual or it had to be something else. Perhaps, he didn't even know? There was no way to tell.

We walked into the Whisky-A-Go-Go early for a show.

There were dances already dancing on the tables and a large crowd just waiting. They knew who we were. A lot of them even knew who I was. I imagine how it must have looked to them, with me clinging to Tommy. I imagine most of them thought I had fucked probably all the members of the band by now. Some of them had jealous stares. I only wished I could tell them that it was Mick who had ever come close to seeing me orgasm. Nikki had come close and I knew that Tommy would likely begin to get impatient. He hadn't made any moves sexually. Yet. He was still dating Jessica and had a plethora of girls he fooled around with every week.

Of course, it wasn't peaceful for long.

Nikki had been on edge.

He had been on edge for days now and we were constantly walking on eggshells. Well, I say we, but it was really just everyone else. My level of care had dropped to zero. He can get mad all he wanted to. Over what? I had no idea.

It didn't take long for him to get riled up over some douchebag's comments. I watched as he slammed the dude's face down in the bar. There was the crack of bone and blood spurting out from the guy's nose. Nikki didn't stop there. He tossed a few empty glasses in the direction of the guy's head. None of the guys wanted to stop him. We all knew how Nikki was.

The guy's pleas brought forth a bouncer from the midst of the moving bodies.

We were prepared for Nikki to get thrown out.

Instead, the bouncer laughed and they both watched as Nikki let go of the guy who dropped to the ground in his misery. Some girl stepped forth in an attempt to help him. I stopped paying attention after that.

"Do you wanna dance?" Tommy asked into my ear. I looked up at him, smiled, and shook my head. He ran a hand over my shoulder before leaving me to my lonesome. Mick had already ducked over to some corner where he would no doubt wait out the evening until they got up to play.

I watched as the bouncer led Nikki and Vince upstairs.

I went to find Mick.

People weren't my scene either.

I sniffed and absent-mindedly rubbed at my nose. My high had worn off, almost. I didn't trust anything in the club. Already, the baby-powder story had been told as a warning. Of course, Vince had received a full lecture over injecting cocaine versus snorting it. The irony, the hypocrisy of it all. In only a few years, both Tommy and Nikki would be shooting up on the regular.

They would be known as the terror twins.

I almost fell as I seated myself beside Mick. He reached out to catch me.

"Where did Tommy go?" He asked.

"Somewhere," I shrugged. "Probably, wherever Nikki went."

"Those fucking idiots," Mick cursed. "Watch them get too fucking high to see. We have a show to do."

"Pass me that," I asked, reaching for his drink.

Mick drew it back and looked at me cautiously, "Do me a favor and stick to getting high and drunk at home."

"Excuse me?" I raised a brow.

"Please," Mick added. "I'd hate to see you get hurt."

I wanted to scream, but instead, I sighed. He was right. I needed to be on constant alert. Who knows what could happen if I weren't high or sober. So much shit could go down and for me to not even remember it - Nah. I didn't have Linda to watch my back and the boys would be on stage, unable to help me out in case some douchebag tried to take advantage of me.

Despite the rationale behind this, I still groaned and my nose still twinged in wanting.

"Just a little bit," I begged.

Mick sighed before he handed the bottle over it. He watched me carefully as I took a swig down as the burn of the whiskey raked down my throat.

The boys had been gone for an awfully long time. Mick and I looked at each other and upstairs. We made our way to the staircase, guarded by a bouncer, who recognized Mick.

"Have fun," the bouncer winked.

If we thought downstairs was a party - the upstairs was practically a fucking orgy. There was a bar. We saw Nikki first. There was some blonde girl giving him a hand-job at the table.

I ignored her. I refused to be jealous over someone who wasn't even mine to be jealous over. "Nikki," I stated and watched as he shot up in his seat. He looked over and glared at me.

"What?"

"We only a few minutes," I pointed at the clock. He looked up at it with wide eyes.

"Sorry," He murmured as he swatted the groupie's hand away and put his dick back in his pants. I tried not to stare. Burrito. Burrito. Burrito. It was all I could repeat inside my brain. Mick had gone to look for Tommy. Nikki and I soon began our search for Vince.

It was almost awkward if not for the sound and the crowds of people waving us in and out. We looked for every blonde-haired man we could see. We had even grabbed at a few women by accident, which had made both Nikki and I practically collapse in giggles. He was higher than I was by this point.

He looked so gorgeous when he smiled when he truly seemed happy. It always seemed to take my breath away. Yet, at the same time, it made my head throb and I longed to throw myself as Tommy. He wasn't as confusing. He didn't make my head hurt. I knew what he wanted. Nikki always seemed to be a different person day-by-day. People who've been hurt, who bore emotional scars, they tended to be like that.

We ended up finding Vince on the outside of the club. By find, well, he wasn't coherent. He was under a blue car. Nikki had to drag him up and bring him back inside. Although, he definitely didn't let him go. We had to inform the Whiskey that our band was too messed up to play. It was the first time we had ever done such a thing.

Soon, we met up with one, concerned Mick Mars who couldn't find Tommy. We searched the place up, down, left and right.

"I wonder if he's in one of the closets?" I had to yell over the music.

"Fucking someone?" Nikki raised a brow.

"It is Tommy," I emphasized.

We made our way to the back. We looked in all the closets, finding many couples, but no gangly giant with make-up covering his face. Where the hell had the man gone? It was weird being civil with Nikki. It wasn't too rare of an occurrence. It was possible. Was it common, though? Not at all.

We ended up going home, knowing Tommy would show up sooner or later.

It didn't take long to realize what had happened.

I opened the door to my room and found a half-naked girl hand-cuffed to my bed. Nikki had dropped Vince to the couch. He soon spied in after me. We both stared at the girl in handcuffs. They were Tommy's.

"When did he even have the time to-" I tried to question as I looked at the girl, who was asleep. I stopped speaking when I looked behind me to see Nikki staring at me with intense eyes.

"Probably not long after he left you by yourself," Nikki spoke, his words harsh.

They didn't hurt me though.

I refused to let them.

In fact, I narrowed my own eyes, "I don't know what you're trying to do, but stop."

Nikki's eyes practically glowed, even in the dim light of the house. "What are you gonna do about it? Tommy ain't here. He's probably fucking groupie right now, as we speak."

I shut my eyes as the ringing grew louder in my mind.

"Does that make you mad?" Nikki taunted.

"No," I murmured.

"No?"

I opened my eyes, my mouth set into a thin line, "No. I'm more concerned over how I'm going to get the girl off of my bed. The chances of Tommy having swallowed the key again is far too high for my liking."

Nikki snorted, "Right."

"What?" I asked. What the hell was his deal?

"The idea of Tommy fucking someone else doesn't even make you the slightest bit mad."

"Fucking someone else? We haven't even fucked yet. Nikki, Tommy and I aren't even a thing."

"You're such a liar," Nikki declared, as he shoved himself closer to her. "All you do is cling to him. This is the most we've spoken in fucking days. And you're telling me you're a fucking virgin? This is the most we've spoken in days!"

We could both hear the hand-cuffed girl shift.

I stared hard up at him. His eyes drifted downward and I felt something drip from my nose. I brandished my arm, prepared to wipe up snot. Instead, the color red was smeared across my arm.

"Holy fuck," I suddenly felt dizzy as I continued to wipe at my nose. More and more red. I pushed past Nikki and ran into the bathroom. There was a thick stream of blood trying to make its way out of my nose.

I grabbed some toilet paper and held it over my nose, squeezing my nostrils as I leaned forward.

"What are you doing?" Nikki said. "You're supposed to lean back."

I shook my head. "That's a myth."

"Future thing?" He spoke.

"Yeah," I murmured. I was so dizzy all of a sudden. I couldn't remember being this dizzy before. I tried to steady myself on the wall but I missed it. Unfortunately, this led to me steadying myself on Nikki. He refrained from shoving me off, though. "I've never had a nosebleed before..."

I almost dropped the wadded up toilet paper before Nikki grabbed it and threw it to the side. It had bled through and he got another few sheets to place them under my nose. He did this so softly it was almost as if it wasn't even Nikki. It was a quiet, intense moment of silence as we leaned against the bathroom wall, closer than ever before.

It was a kind act that Nikki hadn't bestowed me in weeks.

The fact his hand was pressed gently against my nose, my own hands covering his, as we stared at each other, unsure of what to do with ourselves. I could my heart beat faster and faster as my head pounded to a tune that I was not familiar with.

Nikki dropped his hand and mine absently followed. The blood began to gently run down my face, but that didn't matter, because Nikki pressed his lips against mine. I didn't even have time to think about how grossed out I should be the fact by the metallic tang that managed to smear in between our mouths - and the fact that it had come from my nose. No, the only thing I could pay attention to was how unbearably hot the room felt.

I traced my hands up his bare arms until the gripped around his neck and we were soon pressed harder and harder up against each other. He pulled back to look at me - his pupils were blown and it was hard to tell what was lip-stick and what was blood that was smeared over his chin and mouth.

Tommy definitely didn't deserve this.

It didn't matter that he was clearly fucking other people. We weren't together, but I knew he cared for me. He loved me as he so often claimed. This stopped neither Nikki nor me from leaning into each other's hard kiss. This wasn't a kiss built on romance - this was the result of lust and wanting that had been building up for months now.

Now, what exactly were we going to do with it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I just do that? Yes. So - I'm re-reading through a lot of the dirt and even starting on Tommyland. I've messed up on SEVERAL facts but I ain't even gonna point them out. It's okay. We all make mistakes. I'm just annoyed at myself xD. Since I'm apparently doing shout-outs now. WestHamBabe - every review you make is extremely appreciated! You're probably the number 1 reviewer in this entire fandom and honestly, that's amazing. 
> 
> I'm seriously just in awe over how far this fanfic has come. Like - you guys I've never written anything this big before. It's astonishing because I have like a half-a-million unfinished Harry Potter stories that I've never gone through with. To think, all it took was four, musically-awesome babes also known as Motley Crue.


	24. Estranged by Guns N' Roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure you noticed the change in titles. I found it way more fitting considering how much Nova (and I) love music. ALSO - I'm starting my first job ever today/tomorrow (it's 11:55 PM atm)...But instead of preparing, I just wrote up this chapter SMH. I have to wake up flipping early for this one! Which as a college student - I've made my schedule so that I would do the exact opposite. It's an oof but a good oof because I'll be making coin xD

It was at the exact wrong moment that my sickness decided to return. The nose-bleed, though to be an effect from the cocaine, and still likely was, had just been the beginning. Nikki's passionate kiss hadn't been the only thing causing my head to spin, my knees to shake, and my grip on his shoulders to grow weaker and weaker as I lost my balance. I fell and Nikki soon realized that it wasn't him that was causing it.

He gripped at me tightly and clutched at me with worried eyes. It was the most worried I had ever seen him. I felt the warm blood seep out of my nose as the black dots danced throughout my vision. I felt my stomach lurch and twist and turn in all uncomfortable ways. I could only hope that I wasn't bleeding elsewhere.

"Nova," Nikki said as he held me tightly.

At that moment, he felt as warm as Tommy.

I think he repeated my name but I could barely hear him. It was then that I passed out completely. All good things had to come to an end eventually.

They were unable to bring me to a hospital for obvious reasons. The hospital was more likely to kick me out than keep me in. So they nursed me on the stupid, leather couch. I say they - but - it was mostly Mick. He was a dutiful friend. It was in his nature to care about us kids. There were sometimes where I would come out of my coma, but I couldn't even remember those times. Usually, it was their chance to feed me.

"You were just bug-eyed," Tommy had stated, hugging me the moment I awoke. "It was freaky, dude."

That was not to say that Tommy had stayed by my side the entire time I was ill. No, no. He and Nikki and Vince continued to party their hearts out. They were too young, too selfish, and I could barely blame them. In my eyes, I had brought this upon myself. It felt like karma, it felt like the universe was out to get me. I had thought I was done with being so sick.

It hadn't happened in months.

And then all of a sudden, I kiss Nikki..and I mean kiss Nikki like my life depended on it...and then I come even closer to death than I was before. Of course, I didn't attribute it to the excess of blow and the lack of water and food until much later in life. At that time, however, it must have been brought upon by nothing but spiritual, ethereal reasons.

"Where are those bastards?" I spoke up as I pushed myself on the leather couch. Mick sat by with a bottle of his favorite - vodka. It was like the alcohol didn't even affect him anymore. The bleeding had stopped running out of my nose. Luckily, I hadn't bled any down there either. My periods were sporadic and I was never able to time them accurately. It was both a curse and a blessing for I rarely got periods, ever. I had been in-and-out in the past few hours.

One moment, the boys had been there and then the next, just Mick.

"They're across the street - acting like animals," he had replied. "We did another show tonight. There were a lot of people there."

"That's wonderful," I smiled softly.

Mick stared at me intensely, "I threw out the cocaine."

The smile fell off my face in an instant.

"You what?" I spoke venomously. It was clear he had been dreading this conversation. I wanted to beat him. For once in my life, I felt as though I truly meant it. However, there was a certain clarity in my head. This was the longest I had really, truly been completely and entirely sober in days.

"I...Threw...out the cocaine," Mick closed his eyes. "It was for your own good."

"My own good?" I mocked. "How do you know what's good for me?"

"Look at you, Nova. You're collapsed on the couch. You can't even walk."

"I can walk," I spoke defensively, knowing fully well that I could not. He stared at me, daring me to go through with it. I pushed myself slowly off the couch and stood confidently up. Unfortunately, I took one step forward and tripped right onto the floor. He didn't even bother to try and catch me. Not that I wanted him to. He did, however, help me up as soon as I was done falling. I glared at him. "That was not your place."

"It wasn't," Mick agreed to that. "I didn't want it to be, either. But I don't want you to die, Nova. None of us do. And I thought - maybe - you would get better, but it just seems like you're getting worse. I've struggled with wanting to help you but also wanting to let you choose your own fate. I'm a fool for that. Getting addicted to that shit...It gets to everyone, no matter how smart or stable or healthy or whatever. And so I did what none of the boys were willing to do. I pulled on my grown-up pants and I threw it out."

It was probably the most Mick had ever said in one sitting, ever.

I sat there silently.

I knew he was right.

I didn't want to admit it.

But he was right - completely and entirely.

"I almost died," I murmured, thinking back on it. "Had none of you been here...I would have. But it wasn't because of cocaine?"

"No?" Mick questioned curiously.

"No, it couldn't have been. I was sober...ish. Besides, that's not how it goes. I've seen how it goes. I've...the nosebleed, sure, cocaine. But the sickness. This isn't the first time I've been sick this year," I explained. "You weren't here for it, but I got sick when I first came here. Really sick."

"So what you're saying is - this is some sort of time sickness?" Mick offered.

"It has to be," I spoke softly. "It happened a few more times after, but never this bad."

"Maybe it's the stress of it. The drugs, the lack of a proper diet, " He flashed his eyes at me on that note, "the horrific love triangle you've caused." I felt properly attacked then. I let my eyes fall as I refused to look at him directly.

"Take it from an old man who's seen bands break up over groupies countless of times. Fuck em' both, I don't care, but don't play with them. I know - it's grief and you didn't mean what you said to Tommy, but the boy needs to know."

"Who says I didn't mean what I said?" I spoke.

Mick paused and sighed. He pinched at his nose and tried to think of what to say next. "You know what I mean," he stated. "You're not ready for whatever he wants."

"Me? Not ready? Look at Tommy! The boy still has an actual girlfriend and he's screwing chicks left and right and proclaiming his love for me. If anything, he's not ready. And that's not his fault. He's just Tommy. That's just how he is," I twirled my fingers around.

"As you said, that's just Tommy. You know better," Mick felt like a proper dad sounding like that. I had never had a Dad - not a real one at least. Sure, the sperm donor was around. I saw him sometimes, but that was it.

Mick was right, though.

I did know better. I knew how it would all end. And it wasn't good, but I was still eighteen and I was undeniably selfish. I wanted them both, now, in completely different ways. Tommy, for the warmth he enveloped, and Nikki, for the pure, raw, unadulterated tingles he sent up and down my spine on a rather daily basis.

"We can discuss this another time," I added quickly. "I have a growing head-ache."

Unfortunately, it was not going to go away anytime soon for the door to the apartment flung open and in came the boys I had grown oh-so fond of, along with an extra girl. This girl, however, was garbed in a dirty Cinderella costume. I had seen her several times while walking up and down the Strip.

She was quite an infamous character and it was only a matter of time before Motley Crue sunk their filthy claws in her. She was currently being fondled by Vince - his large hands cupping the cheap, blue material that covered the outside of her breasts. There was a tiara half-clung to her head where it sat on top of a curled, beach-blonde hair. I'm pretty sure the Cinderella costume was the only outfit she owned.

"I dared you to fuck her," Nikki slurred, wrapping his arm around Tommy's shoulders. "Now, fuck her," he demanded. He truly was the king of Motley Crue because Tommy didn't even hesitate. He pushed Vince away.

"Hey man," Vince spoke as he tried to grab back at the girl.

"Only Tommy! That was the dare." Nikki smirked and let out a loud laugh, smacking Vince's hand away, as he pushed Cinderella girl into Tommy's arms. I didn't twinge. I just looked on and I could see Mick reaching for another swig of alcohol. I wanted to demand for it. I wanted to get high and drunk. I wanted to do something stupid. A part of me even wished that I had never even woke up.

Nikki looked at me.

He was a wonderful actor while high, but I knew him. I knew him better than he knew himself, at times, and in those eyes of his, there was nothing but a fire that called for destruction. He wanted me to hurt. He wanted Tommy to hurt his chances. I knew that now. Our kiss in the bathroom had been on my mind every second that I was awake. Him and Linda. Him and Linda. Constantly dragging my experiences with them throughout my mind.

It was enough to drive a girl insane.

Nikki felt something for me.

I could only remain dumb for so long.

It was a lustful need to possess. Not that I looked anything special. I was a bit chubby and a clearly way too dorky, although I had changed a lot. However, I was a time traveler and in Nikki's eyes - I had clearly fallen right into his arms - emphasis on his. It had taken me too long. TOO long.

It was like my miniature coma had brought me back to my senses.

My "time-sickness" had humbled me. I don't know how nor do I know why it happened in the first place, but it had done something and while groggy at times, my mind felt clearer than ever.

I could hear the sounds of Cinderella getting fucked in the room next to us. Tommy would do anything. Who knows how many men she had sex with on a daily basis. It didn't matter to them. It never did. Vince looked longingly over at the door to the room.

"We should steal her fucking costume," Nikki proclaimed loudly. "I fucking hated Cinderella."

Vince snorted at the thought.

"I'm serious, dude," Nikki spoke.

"Really?" Vince asked, he then shrugged and smirked. "Let's do it."

"That's fucking cruel," I murmured.

"Excuse me?" Nikki exclaimed as he turned his gaze back at me. He was close to the couch, leaning on it for support. He looked amazing. Sweat smeared his make-up. I hadn't noticed the lack of heels. I saw a pair of them by the door. One of the heels had broken and he must have thrown them the moment he had walked in. I was surprised he didn't just trash them.

"You heard what I said," I spoke louder. "That's fucking cruel."

"You gonna do anything about it?" He wanted it. He wanted us to fight. He apparently wanted us to nom each other's faces off.

I stayed silent.

No.

I was not gonna put myself through that.

"Do what you like then," I shrugged as I feigned indifference and fell down against the couch. I didn't even look at his face, but I hoped his smirk fell. "It's all gonna come back and bite us all in the asses, eventually."

My words didn't even bother them. They only seemed to make them even more horrible. They stole her dress out from the room. Nikki brought out a switch-blade and began to tear into the fabric, shredding it until there was nothing to be salvaged. It grew less fun for Vince. He wasn't cruel - as cruel - as Nikki, but he didn't stop him either. I felt guilty. Maybe they would have only taken it had I not said anything? Maybe they would have even given it back?

I wouldn't know.

When she and Tommy were done - she came back - and collapsed into tears. Tommy was chivalrous and lent her a shirt to leave in. She certainly wasn't allowed to stay. I could only imagine the shit that went down when I wasn't around.

As coherent as I was, as sober as I was - some things never changed.

I was such a coward.


	25. Don't Stop Me Now by Queen

There was a sickly sweet smell of oranges that lingered around the room, filling the air with the horrific scent. Normally, I wouldn't mind. Hell, I might have even enjoyed it if not for the person it belonged to. She was blonde and rail-thin and had an awfully thick German accent. None of these things did I hate her for.

No, no.

It was the fact that her head was currently tucked underneath Nikki's arm that made me want to get a knife and throw it at her. It was unfair. It was always unfair. Nikki could be kind one moment and cruel in the other. It was absolutely maddening how fast his feelings seemed to change one way or the other.

Sometime between now and three weeks ago - when that particularly bloody kiss had happened - Nikki had decided that he wanted to get into another relationship. Her name was Klara Krauss and she was a German model apparently. The boys had affectionately deemed her Himmler.

Sometime in the weeks that I was sick and unable to go to the clubs and parties, Nikki and Klara had met and had fallen deep, deep in lust. That was an exaggeration, of course, but my feelings had a tendency to do that. Himmler had been around for a good three days now. She was nice, decent, somewhat stable in comparison to the other girlfriends that Nikki had dated.

She even had a moral compass.

It was almost disgusting.

I sat on the counter-top of the kitchen, swinging my legs left and right. I kept myself composed. Or so I thought, I had a feeling that I was glaring daggers because every so often Himmler would look up and then swiftly look right back down. Nikki didn't notice. At least, he pretended not to notice.

It was a double whammy that night.

Not only was Nikki being clung on by Himmler, but Jessica happened to be around. She seemed to pop up at the worst possible times ever. It was an awkward affair, but it felt as though it were only awkward for me. It was so uncomfortable, I didn't even drink. I tried to sip at a beer, but it was just a silly distraction, and I grew more fascinated with how tight I could clench my hand around the glass bottle without it breaking. It had yet to shatter in my hands. I had no one at the moment. Mick had long left. The Thing had dragged him back to their apartment. Unlike the other two girls, she didn't leave Mick alone for long periods of time. She was smart in that manner.

It was wrong.

I knew it was.

I had no right to be jealous.

We weren't together.

The fact that Tommy and I had kissed several times over made it hard to stare at Jessica without a sense of guilt beginning to bubble in my chest. He was her boyfriend. Not mine. And for the longest time, I didn't want him to be. It wasn't like the explosive feelings of lust and anger that Nikki and I shared. It was a different sort of love. Well, not love, but...Yeah. Tommy and I vibed together well. He was a goof - absolutely disgusting - but a goof and he knew how to make everyone around him laugh and forget about all the sick shit he and Nikki got up to.

There was a sudden shriek that drew me from my thoughts.

Jessica had flung herself back as Tommy wiggled a critter-crawler in front of her face. It was a cockroach and it was currently struggling to escape Tommy's grasp. It failed. He threw it at her and it clung to Jessica's face as though she were its lord and savior. She threw it off and smacked Tommy across the face.

"Fuck you!"

Oh, yes.

I had almost forgotten.

Jessica and the Thing were very similar. She didn't always hit Tommy. She knew the line. But she did tend to throw things and put dents into walls. I never got in her way. I knew that Himmler got a little freaked out at the sight of their fight. It was almost comical to watch as Tommy dodged her throwing random shit at him. Shoes, drugs, a pillow. Anything. I would have laughed a few weeks ago, but now a frown rested deeply on my face. I wish Tommy would find someone who truly did love him. Even in 2020, it was...iffy. He was married and supposedly happily, but...It was still a classic rockstar marries much younger woman with a fondness for clout.

Clout being popularity.

She had been a social media star.

Barely, a star.

I remember watching Trisha Paytas talk about an Instagram fight that she and Tommy and his wife would get into. It was all very dramatic and unnecessary. It was very un-Tommy like. It was hard to think that in forty years Tommy would become THAT guy. I tried not to think about it. I tried not to think about home.

Himmler was trying to settle the situation.

She was nice.

"Pleaze, calm down," She said, her accent heavy.

Nikki didn't like her trying to stifle the firey explosions going on beside them. I had zoned out as I always did and I only came out of my daze when Himmler called at me several times. I realized that Jessica was looking at a few pictures that Himmler had taken out of her purse.

"Dude, that's sick-" Tommy was stating.

"Nova! Vould you like to zee?"

Himmler waved a picture from her hand.

I nodded, "sure."

Carefully, I got down from the bar and took the picture out of her grasp. My mouth about fell open. Freddie Mercury had an arm wrapped around her and they were smiling at the camera.

"You fucked with Queen?"

"I did nat fuck wiz Queen," Himmler said, insulted. "I just met zem."

"No, no. That's what I meant," I clarified.

"I vave more picturez with de whole group," she held out a hand to the pictures Tommy was holding. I grasped the polaroids and as I stared at the group...I couldn't not keep staring. There was Freddie, Brian, Roger, and John, but there were a few other men as well. There was one man, a bit chubby, but clearly well-muscled. There was Himmler right to the side, still smiling. And in the back...Was a man...Who loomed over everyone else.

It was Joe.

I felt the blood turn cold in my veins.

I felt my entire world mentally explode.

No way.

It had to have been someone who just looked like Joe...Not Joe himself. I had never even met Joe in real life. He could've been anyone. He loved Queen. He could've just...saved this same picture somehow...and used it as his picture...It didn't make any sense. At all. There was no way. There was no- It was such a lie. There was totally a way. I had traveled back in time after all.

Why couldn't Joe?

And of course, he ended up with Queen.

It was only his favorite band ever.

My hands shook as I handed the picture back.

What could I do about it?

I couldn't just live life without meeting the Joe-Look-A-Like.

"Who is that man?" I asked, looking at Himmler, pointing at Joe.

I wanted it to be a different name. I almost didn't want it to be him.

"Oh? Zat is Joe. He iz a roadie for Queen. Cute, no?"

"No," I spoke absent-mindedly.

Nikki glanced at me, curious. It was the first time the man had decided to really look at me that night. I didn't care about him at the moment. Joe. Oh my God. Joe! It had to be him. It had to be!

"When was this?"

"Not long," Himmler said. "I met zem in New York - for zeir tour."

"Tour...Tour! Are they coming to Los Angeles!" I demanded.

Himmler shrugged, "I do naht know."

I had to find out.

Before I could even think, however - the fighting between Jessica and Tommy had begun once more. I was left to sink against the kitchen counter-top. I thought of Joe. I could think of nothing but my formerly former best friend. I had never thought I would ever see him again. It had to be him. I was sure of it. It was only too coincidental.

"Fine! I'm fucking done with you and your shitty fucking band!" Jessica screamed as she chucked a drum-stick at Tommy, who dodged it. She walked out of the apartment. Not even the fact that Tommy's relationship was over could draw me from my state of mind.

Someone up above was really looking out for me.

They really were.

Now, if I only I could find out when I could meet them. What if they had already been to Los Angeles? I scrapped that idea knowing fully well that both Tommy and Nikki would've freaked over Queen performing in Los Angeles. We would've never been able to afford tickets, but no doubt, they would've already tried to sneak into the concert anyway.

I needed a plan and I needed one soon.

Nothing could stop me from meeting the Joe-Look-A-Like. 

I knew that much.


	26. Creatures of the Night by KISS

In the grand scheme of things, Himmler didn't last. I knew she wouldn't. Everyone knew she wouldn't. Nikki didn't keep girls for very long. They had to have something special, something weird, or useful. Himmler had none of these qualities, regardless, it was a mutually consensual break-up. Himmler was a model and was going to fly back into Germany.

I would almost miss her.

Almost.

Because if not for Himmler, I would've never known that somewhere out there, touring with Queen, was Joe.

The boys were confused by my change in pace, my change in personality. I was no longer moping about, but instead, I had something to focus on. It had been so long since I truly had something to pour my energy into.

"Queen? What's so special about Queen?" Mick had asked as I continued to dig through flyers, looking for old tour updates of bands. There had to be have been one for Queen somewhere. They had released an album in 1980, but we were at the brink of 1982. I knew they would also release an album soon, but...Could I even wait that long? I had no idea. "You seem really hooked on that picture Himmler showed you."

I turned my head and looked at Mick, softly. I knew he would understand more than anyone else. "There's another time-traveler out there," I explained. "I need to find him."

The boys had just finished performing another show at the Rainbow. The sounds of the music could still be heard through all the walls. I could barely hear Mick over the music.

"Another one?"

"Yep, I saw him in the photo."

"I'm guessing you knew him?"

I smiled sadly, "Yeah, I did. He was one of my greatest friends before...I came here. I don't understand why he got sent back here too. God, I'd hope he'd recognize me."

"Why wouldn't he?"

"...The future is very different, Mick. Let's leave it at that."

Joe and I had met online, after all. We had seen pictures of each other, of course, but neither of us was very fond of them - pictures that is. I had taken more pictures with Motley Crue than I had in my own flipping time. There were a lot of things that Mick got, but I'm sure the idea of the Internet wouldn't come easily. I had changed a lot since the last photo Joe had seen of me. Even I knew that. I was quite proud of it, actually.

It was probably the hundredth slip of paper I had pulled up, but my eyes widened as I saw the tour name and the list of dates. A smile marked my face as I ran my eyes over the list of dates. My face fell as I realized that they had already toured in Los Angeles. I was so disappointed in myself. Realistically, I didn't even know Joe existed in 1981 until the week prior.

There was only one date left. Luckily for me, they had toured Europe first and then the United States.

They were both in California, thank God.

"It's tomorrow," I murmured, "In San Francisco."

"That's a long drive," Mick muttered.

"I know...I can do it," I stated as I ignored the feeling of wanting to puke. Driving was far from my specialty. This was well-known. I had also not been allowed to drive for a long time. It was just something I never had the opportunity to do and I never asked to do it. I hoped it was like riding a bike - something I would never forget.

I stuffed the piece of paper into my bra and both Mick and I walked out of the room into the crowd of bodies. We were going to the upper floor - where the real party was. We always had to stay - to make sure that none of the boys died, which they often came close to doing.

Both Tommy and Nikki could be seen nowhere in sight.

I could only wonder what they were doing.

Who they were doing.

I tried not to think about it.

"Do you think he'll mind if I borrow the van?" I asked Mick, speaking as loud as I could.

"Uh, yeah," Mick laughed. "Hell yeah, he'll mind. The last thing Nikki and Tommy are gonna want you to do is drive ten hours north without their permission."

"I don't need their permission," I sniffed.

"I know that," Mick stated, "Because I'm not a fucking animal."

He had a fair point. I knew well enough that Tommy and Nikki would protest heavily in their own ways that I should, in no way, go up to that concert alone. Even Mick was hesitant about it. I don't think he trusted me to not have some sort of emotional break-down, which was quite understandable.

It was better to tell Tommy and Nikki now - while they were likely inebriated than wait until they were down from their high. At least then I could probably run faster. Nikki had a thing with quaaludes, at the moment. They were a sedative. I looked over through the dancing bodies and pushed my way through them.

I saw Nikki come out of a closet - the sounds of moans behind him. The door had opened just enough for me to see Tommy ramming into some girl as she moaned, "Nikki, Nikki!" I knew right then and there that she had no idea it was Tommy that she was having sex with. She was turned around. There were only a few lights on the outside of the closet - they flashed and danced and made it difficult to see, especially if she was as high as I thought she was.

Nikki didn't see me as I watched him drag some scrawny kid out of the crowd.

"Ready to lose your virginity?" I could hear him say with a wide grin on his face.

I had paled - the fuck? I could briefly remember having read about this in the book. I could remember that the girl would get raped after she left the party. She was technically getting raped now. I knew that if she realized it was Tommy and not Nikki - that she wouldn't even be disgusted. She would probably be overjoyed that she had sex with not just one band member, but two.

It was truly a different world.

"Nikki," I shouted, waving my hand up. He looked up and tensed as he saw me. His grasp on the guy's shoulder was tight but he dropped it.

"Can I help you?" he slurred. The dude laughed beside him.

"I gotta tell you something-" I glanced at the closet, "And Tommy."

A lazy smirk decorated Nikki's face as he leaned towards me. I wrinkled my nose at the smell of sex. He absolutely reeked of it. "Is it important?"

"I'd say so," I murmured as he grew too close for my liking. I tried to avoid flickering my eyes towards his lips. I failed, of course, because he was so close now that I could feel the heat the came off of him. Or did it come off of me? He made me feel so many confusing things. I hated it yet loved it all at once.

"Well, go on, tell me."

"I have to leave tonight."

The smirk fell off of his face. "What?"

"There's a Queen concert, tomorrow. In San Franciso. It's their last one. I have to be there."

"Why-"

The dude got bored at his side and promptly left to join back into the crowd. We both looked at him. "Because I know someone with them and he's really important," I tried to explain.

"More important than us?"

Yes.

No.

Yes.

What?

I refused to answer as I refused to look him in the eyes. "I know him," I said. "From the future."

Nikki went silent at those implications. It meant that I now had someone else other than Nikki or even Tommy. I had something else to worry about other than Motley Crue. We all seemed to forget that. I expected him to get mad. I expected him to get even a little bit angry. He didn't.

"Okay," he spoke softly.

He then reached and grasped at my face and kissed me. Nikki always had a way of surprising me. Always. I leaned into it, relishing in the tingles that went up and down my spine. He pulled back.

"I want to go with you," Nikki said.

"What?"

Nikki didn't repeat himself.

He pulled out Tommy's key from his right heel.

"Let's go."

That definitely hadn't been something I was expecting. I looked at the closet and then as we walked past Mick.

"You see that closet over there," I pointed it out to Mick. "Tommy's screwing a girl in there. When she comes out - make sure she gets home, safely. Promise me, Mick."

"Okay, okay. I promise." Mick held up his hands in surrender. He then looked at Nikki. "He's going?" He pointed at him while looking at me.

I nodded.

"He's high out of his mind."

"I know," I sighed. "But he wanted to come."

We left the Rainbow and gathered into Tommy's van. All of the instruments had been loaded up. Nikki sluggishly got into the passenger seat.

"All right," I stated. "Let's get this show on the road."

I turned the engine on.

I stared blankly out on the busy street, looked at Nikki (whose eyes were completely clouded over), and knew it was going to be a long night.


	27. Red Hot by Motley Crue

"You're a fucking terrible driver."

I grimaced at the sound of yet another complaint as I may or may not have accidentally run another red light. It was nearly three in the morning and we had yet to reach San Francisco. Due to the time and the fact we were in-between a plethora of growing towns, there were few cops around to catch my sordid acts. Motley Crue had yet to become famous and thus held no sway over any of the cops we could potentially come across.

The last thing I needed was jail.

I thought back to the one time I had to run from them. They had yet to bother us again. My blue hair was long gone and I had yet to be back to that diner. Although, Tommy had told me that the waitress had quit right after I had punched her in the face. I still didn't want to risk it, even if I apparently looked completely different.

Hair could make a person.

It really could.

"I can't help it," I sniffed as I tightened my grip on the steering wheel.

"You should let me drive," Nikki stated.

"You're still high."

"No, I'm not," he insisted.

I shook my head and laughed, "I don't want to take that chance."

"You drive like you're high anyways," Nikki pointed out.

"I do not!" I said as I jerked my head to look at him. It did nothing but prove his point because the stupid steering wheel decided to follow me. I yanked it back into place as we skirted along the edge of the road for a few brief seconds.

"This guy really means a lot to you?"

I went silent for a second. "In a sense, he's the only thing I have left of my time, aside from my phone and a few dollars - but those are just material objects. He's a whole person. It's so insane that he's out there and only a few hours away!"

Nikki didn't seem as excited as me.

"What if it's not him?"

I scoffed, "It's him."

"How do you know?"

"He's working with Queen of all the bands. Of course, it's him. Queen was his life. He named his kids after the bandmembers and everything."

"You're joking," Nikki snorted.

"Nope," I smiled at the thought. "Freddie, Brianna, Taylor, and Johanna. They're quads."

"Quads?"

"Like twins, but there were four of them."

Nikki paled at the idea, "Poor man."

"I won our bet. I knew it was gonna be more than two. I just knew." I nodded. There were moments where it felt as though we were closer than what we actually were. Or maybe we pretended otherwise? I wouldn't know. I wouldn't dare ask.

The rest of the drive was quiet. I hadn't even thought to bring my phone - to blast some tunes on the way down. The radio was quiet, buzzing pop-songs at a minimum level. I didn't turn it higher. I didn't want Nikki to yeet me out of the driver's seat.

"Do you miss it? The future?"

"Always," I said softly. "I'll always miss it. It's so unlike now."

"Do they have flying cars, yet?"

"Well, kind of, but also not really. They cost millions of dollars. I've never ridden in one."

"You haven't ridden in much," Nikki said.

I narrowed my eyes at the statement, "Was that a dig?"

Nikki shrugged, "Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't."

"You're so annoying," I sniffed. "I don't even know why I brought you with me." A part of me thought that the last bit was too harsh and I wanted to apologize. But it was Nikki! He could handle it. In fact, he often said and did worse shit on a daily basis.

"I know why," he taunted. "I know why you did it."

"Oh yeah? Do tell."

There was a silence, but then abruptly, Nikki stated:

"You want me."

I swerved again as my body seemed to shut down at that one statement. I reared my head, "excuse me?" He smirked - it was anything but lazy and the sight of it made my heart do acrobatics. He leaned against the front seat, his legs swung up on the dash.

"That is NOT why I brought you with me," I affirmed, staring hard at the road.

"So you do want me then?"

I flushed instantly at realizing my blunder. There wasn't even a way to escape the embarrassment. I was fucking driving a van, but as I glanced at the road, a part of me felt the desire to open the door anyway and throw myself out of it mid-drive. There was no need for this discussion right now. No need at all. I don't even know why Nikki insisted on bringing it up.

Nikki snickered from his side of the van and I felt as reached an arm around and grasped me by the arm. It was a light touch, his calloused fingers dancing at the side of my arm. I flinched at the contact, but then remained eerily still. It was like something out of the wild. Maybe if I stayed still enough the predator would go away? Maybe he would see me as nothing but a part of the background and that I was not the meat he so desired.

There was a trail of goosebumps that Nikki left behind as his warm hands continued to linger against my skin. "What are you doing?" I asked, wanting an answer. He was playing with me. It was like I was one of those tiny, stuffed animals they stuffed with catnip and put on a string - and Nikki was the cat, swatting at me, hoping he'll eventually get to the catnip.

"Shhh, relax," Nikki stated. "You can trust me."

"I don't think I can," I bit out, holding the steering wheel with my free arm.

He sighed, "I've gotten you this far."

He wasn't half-wrong, there. I knew that to be true. Without him, I would've been left homeless and alone on the streets of the Sunset Strip, where douchebags roamed the alleys on a daily basis. I could have been killed or raped or somehow something even worse than either of those two things. I hated thinking about it. It made me vastly uncomfortable and aware of just how grateful I should be towards Nikki, Tommy...Towards the Crue.

Nikki may have seemed soft, even caring in that moment, but as he shifted his grip on my arm. I realized he was pulling my right arm closer and closer to himself. I was practically reached over. It was incredibly dangerous driving, but I swallowed hard and kept my eyes on the road. If I ignored it, he would go away. He didn't because he was Nikki fucking Sixx and he did whatever the hell he liked.

I felt my hand be brought to the tight, black leather pants he wore. The skin of my lip was going to break...I was biting down on it as hard as I could to keep the thoughts of my brain from spilling out. Most of those thoughts consisted of zombie-like sounds as well as a few curse words.

He scrambled a bit with his other hand. I could hear the laces from his belt undoing and I found myself suddenly fondling a half-hard cock. I couldn't stand the idea of looking. Eyes on the road, eyes on the road. I chanted to myself over and over and over again. There was no way this was happening. But even as I said, I couldn't ignore the heat that had reared its head inside of my body, near the depths of my stomach. There were still tingles from where he had traced my arm and, of course, there was a hot, hard member currently being clutched by my hand.

I had never touched one before.

Ever.

I was so tempted to look, but I wasn't going to give Nikki that power. It doesn't matter to me. That's what I told myself at least. The fact that his dick was in my hand meant literally nothing to me. His hand grasped over mine as he maneuvered it to do as he liked. It was warm and it throbbed occasionally - it felt weird. He clenched my hand tightly, much tighter than I would've done it had I been touching it out of my own obligation. He was mostly quiet aside from a few panted breaths.

How the fuck was this happening?

Why the hell was I even letting it happen in the first place?

BURRITO DICK!

There was nothing I could mentally say that allowed me to come to my senses and snatch my hand away. Up, down, clench fist, loosen, slide my finger over the top. I tried to remember what it was like in the many, many romance stories I had read over the years. The head was wet and the unwanted handjob was beginning to attain that slick, liquidy sound.

It took about seven minutes before I felt him clench up, his hips buck under my arm, and a moan forcing its way out of his mouth. It was the most erotic, most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I felt the hot, sticky liquid spurt out into my hand and I nearly grimaced at the unexpected feel of it.

Nikki grabbed at one of the napkins that lingered on the floorboard and wiped up his dick and my hand (the gentleman) as he smirked over at me. I saw it all in the corner of my eye. I still refused to look directly over at him. In fact, I wanted to pretend that it didn't happen at all.

"You liked it," he said. I wasn't sure if he was comforting himself or what. It didn't matter. I hadn't asked for it.

...But I did want it and he was right, I had liked it. My thighs clenched tightly against the other as I tried to curb my thoughts from thinking too deeply into it. Nikki had been horny and I happened to be there. He would have done it with literally any other woman. I'm nothing special. I couldn't allow myself to think that was the case.

There was, of course, a sudden realization that my hand was still on his cock and it had been on its own for quite some time, simply continuing off the motions that Nikki had set it on. If I could blush, even more, I would, but unfortunately, my blushing limits were at max capacity.

Nikki wasn't done with me yet, unfortunately.

He hadn't bothered to wear a seat-belt, because punks don't believe in common sense. This allowed him to move right next to me and push closer and closer to me, his hands went back to dancing over my limbs. Instead of focusing on my arms, however, he focused on my legs. I could feel his fingers slide over my jeans. It sent shivers dancing merrily up my spine.

A cool head, I had to keep a cool head.

I was doing all fine and well until his hand decided to plunge straight towards the depths. My thighs slammed tightly together. It was meant to keep Nikki out, of course, but instead, his hand was trapped there.

"Nikki," I warned. "I'm driving."

"I know," he told me as if I were stupid. "Live a little," he spoke seductively as he lingered against my face.

"I should just slam on breaks and let you fly out the window and we'd see who's LiViNG a LitTle," I mocked. His hand didn't move from my thighs but instead continued to rub soft spots into them.

He nodded, "You should, but you won't."

Damn him.

Damn him to hell and back.

My thighs fell a bit more open as I felt the fire inside of me burn higher. It was like a silent permission for him to continue what he was doing. I didn't look down. I definitely didn't look at him. On the road, my eyes were on the road. This was nothing special. He would do this was just about anyone. Of course, there was a gnawing thought, an idea that seemed to make it's way into my mind, as it always did regarding Nikki.

Nikki didn't care about anybody else's pleasure but his own.

So why was his hand burrowing into my pants? And yes, burrowing was an accurate word. He had expertly unclasped the button and pulled down the zipper and his hand was pressed against my vagina. It made me feel more comfortable, using slightly more scientific terms when it came to myself.

I had never gone this far with another human being before.

A small gasp escaped my mouth as I felt his fingers paw at my vagina, pressing the noticeably damp fabric inwards as he brought two of his fingers against my clitoris. It literally throbbed at his touch. He seemed to smirk at my reaction. I was sure we would have done more had it not been for the sudden sound of a siren ringing through the air.

There was a flash of blue and red lights as panic spun through the both of us. The cop had pulled out behind us. I had been speeding, by about twenty miles over the speed limit of 45. Fuck. I pulled the van over as Nikki tore his hand away from my pants and we both tried to make ourselves look inconspicuous.

"Nikki, what do I do?" I asked quickly.

He didn't answer.

He didn't have time to.

All of a sudden, the policeman was at the front window and he was motioning for me to roll down my window. He was a handsome man, for sure, with golden hair that reflected off the glow of his flashlight. He was a bit older looking than both Nikki and me.

"Any reason why you were driving twenty miles over the speed limit?"

"Sorry, Officer," I flushed.

He shined a light at Nikki, who grimaced and looked away. "We've been driving for about four hours straight. We've been on this road for quite some time. It just escaped my notice." I hurriedly explained. It was true, after all.

"Four hours? Where you headed?"

"San Francisco," I said. "We're going to see a Queen concert."

"Queen? They're alright. I'm more of a Zeppelin guy myself," The policeman laughed.

Was this flirting?

Was he flirting with me?

What.

Nikki snorted and we both turned to look at him.

"Got a problem, son?"

"No," Nikki bit out. "Not at all."

"What's a pretty thing like you hanging out with this punk anyway?" The cop asked as he leaned towards me.

I nitpicked my brain for an answer before blurting out, "He's my br-"

"I'm her boyfriend-" Nikki said, his voice carrying over mine.

"Oh?" The cop faked interested. "Nice taste," he mocked.

"Thank you," I plastered on a fake smile.

Boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

Nikki had just said he was my boyfriend.

I knew it wasn't true and that he was only saying that irritate the cop, but the very idea of it made my heart flutter and send waves of pure giddiness through my veins.

"Tell you what, I'll let you off with a warning," He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a pen. "But if you find yourself in any trouble," he eyed Nikki suspiciously, "Call me."

"Will do," I smiled.

We watched as he got back into his car and went off.

It was almost peaceful.

"ThAnK yOu OfFiCeR," Nikki snorted as he made fun of me, his eyelashes fluttering as he pretended to simper.

"Shut up," I frowned. "I did not sound like that."

"Did too," he said stubbornly.

"Stop being a dick," I bit back.

"I'll be a dick if I want to be a dick. Throw yourself at the fucking cops. I don't fucking care."

It cut. And it cut deeply.

"Whatever," I sighed.

I started the van back up again and ignored the throbbing in between my legs.

It could wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....My mind gets carried away sometimes. It really does. We were meant to meet Queen this chapter but instead, I went with this. I blame it on the fever. Yes. I am very sick. Is it Corona? I have no idea. Also, my list for women who look like my idea of Nova has widened considerably. 
> 
> The List being: 
> 
> Marianne Faithfull
> 
> Jane Asher
> 
> Jessica Lange
> 
> Melanie Keiback
> 
> Mia Goth 
> 
> Melina Weissman 
> 
> and of course, 
> 
> Jean Shrimpton
> 
> That's it. There are a few modern additions as well as vintage. I have a relatively broad idea as to what Nova looks like - physical features wise. I wish I could upload them but for some reason it doesn't work for me and I have no idea why. I should probably just make a wattpad story filled with the pictures or something.


	28. You're My Best Friend by Queen

There were hundreds of cars piled into the one large parking lot, in fact, many of them spilled out over the lot and into the parking lots surrounding it. Many of those cars would find tickets placed neatly under their windshield wipers, not that the owners would really mind. After all, they were going to see one of the greatest bands of all time. That had easily been established by Queen. They were up there with Led Zeppelin. People were clambering to see them from all over. There were even a few crazy fans who had bought tickets to not just one, but quite a few of their shows for their current tour.

I tentatively parked the van in the parking lot of a shady gas station. There were a few other cars there for Queen as well. There was a short, old woman demanding twenty dollars per person so that she wouldn't call the cops on our cars. I made Nikki give her a twenty, not wanting to get Tommy's van impounded.

The stadium was about two blocks away.

We still had no tickets.

I was really hoping that wouldn't be a problem.

In fact, a part of me was hoping to glomp a roadie and demand for Joe as soon as I saw one. Unfortunately, the roadies were likely back-stage, making sure that nothing went wrong. I could imagine Joe already. I bet he was having the time of his life working for Queen.

"Do you at least have a plan?" Nikki asked as he walked along-side of me.

"Find Joe," I murmured.

We got into the long line that was at the ticket booth. I was hoping that there would be enough. I was practically praying for it.

"I know that," Nikki said. "But we can't exactly bring him back to Motley House."

I looked up and glared. "Why not?"

"Because I said so," Nikki huffed. "We have no room for him."

Nikki was right - the smug bastard. He knew he was, of course, but that didn't matter. Nikki never thought he was wrong. I didn't admit him being right, of course. I had grown to be as equally as stubborn.

"It's not like I'm going to ask him to stay with me, anyways."

"You're not?" Was that relief I heard?

I narrowed my eyes at him, "No. Joe loves Queen even more than he loves life. He's touring with them. That's something that he would never have gotten to do - ever. I wouldn't ask him to leave all of that because I'm lonely or whatever."

"I don't get that," Nikki snorted. "We come all of this way and for what - for you to invite him one day for tea."

"Yes," I shrugged. "You have no idea how wonderful it feels to just know that someone like him is in the same situation I'm in."

It took about forty-five minutes until we were up at the front of the booth. God didn't like us in that moment though because the guy could only look at us sadly as he switched the sign and declared that the show was sold out.

"You don't understand, sir," I slammed my fist down on the desk. "I'll do anything for a ticket." I stared hard at the man who seemed to quiver in fear. It was the opposite of seductive and no doubt, I looked more likely to rip off his dick with my bare hands than put it in my mouth.

Nikki went a bit bug-eyed. He put on a charming smile, "Sorry about my girlfriend-"

It was my turn to look the fool. He had said the word again. Girlfriend. My heart fluttered at the prospect. Nikki led me over by the arm. We let the other people behind us receive the devastating news. Nikki closed his eyes before opening them and eyeing the area around us.

"Wait right here," he said.

"Nikki, what are you going to do-"

I had no time to finish before Nikki disappeared into the sea of anxious people. I tried to spot his mop of black hair, but it was to no avail. I was awkwardly standing against the brick wall in my ripped jeans (yes - THE ripped jeans that Mrs. Bass had sewn up for me - I had finally gotten around to ripping them back open) and a simple black t-shirt.

"Anything for a ticket, eh?" Came a nasally voice.

I gulped at the sight of a man who leered at me from the side. He was much to close for comfort. He held out a ticket and practically waved it front of my nose. It was tempting to snatch it and take off, but I had no doubt that I would fail at even that. I didn't even get the chance to respond before his hands were on me in places I definitely didn't want them to be.

My fist clenched at the sight, but as much as I wanted to wack it in the guy's head, I froze. What the fuck? What do I do? Move, dammit. Punch him in the face! It was one thing to say something and then another to actually do that something. Flee or fight. It was clear any sense of bravery I had ever had - had decided to take off without my permission.

The man was suddenly thrown off of me and onto the pavement. Never had I ever been so relieved to see Nikki, who looked infuriated. His hand was curled up into a fist as he reared it across the man's face. It was like watching it in slow motion. In that moment of pure anger, Nikki had never looked more beautiful. I think it must have been because he had done it for me.

He had hit that man, that creep, that douchebag...For me?

"Excuse me, sir, but does there seem to be some sort of problem?"

Security came up.

"Yeah, this creep was touching up on my girl!"

Nikki said - I could see blood on his fist. The man's face looked misshapen as he moaned in pain. One of the security members took him aside.

"Watch yourself, son. We see it happen again...You're outta here." The security officer looked at me kindly. "You alright, miss?"

I nodded quickly.

"What the hell was that?" Nikki demanded to know. "Why didn't you do anything?"

"I-I don't know," I stammered, trying to find the answer out for myself.

"Whatever, I got you a ticket." He pulled out the ticket.

"How did you get it?"

Nikki grinned, "I have my secrets."

I rolled my eyes. I wasn't even going to ask. Knowing Nikki, it was probably drugs. "Just the one?" I eyed it. "You didn't get one for yourself?"

"Nah-"

There was a rustle on the ground. The man from before had dropped his ticket. It laid before us. There must have been a God and he must have loved us right then and there. I reached down to pick it up. I smiled up at him, "I found you one."

He took it in hand and we went into the stadium. It was no Live Aid, obviously. Most of the people stood. Nikki and I did the same. The show started off wonderfully. Freddie came out on the stage and it was like watching a god. At least, for me, it was. I watched as he sang the lyrics and bounced around the stage to legendary songs that wouldn't be forgotten well into the twenty-first century. He was an icon, one that I had never thought it would be possible for me to even see. Yet, there he was.

I felt a tear slip down my cheek.

It was not a tear of sadness, but rather pure, unadulterated joy.

I had almost forgotten to look for Joe.

I felt a hand clutch at my own. I looked up to see Nikki slightly swaying to the music, but the heat of his hand permeated my own. He turned to look at me. It was in the middle of "Coming Soon" that Nikki and I kissed once more. It was as though we were two normal, young kids in love and not the confused mess that we actually were and who couldn't decide if we hated or tolerated each other. But for once, the kiss was actually kind of magical and something that seemed to come out of story-books.

It wasn't a kiss either of us would ever mention again but not one that I would ever forget.

We had a habit of not talking about these sorts of things.

The show ended and once again, I was left in a state of confusion in how to further things. People were pushing past us left and right. I clung to Nikki's hand though like it was my life-force. I tried to convince myself that it was just because I needed to bring him back in one whole piece to Motley House and not because I just liked the feeling of his hand in my own.

Nikki and I saw a group of girls. Their backstage passes were clung to their hands rather than their necks. Nikki walked over to them. One of them seemed to look at him in shock, recognizing him from the group, even without his make-up.

"Oh my god, do you remember me-"

He must have slept with her.

I then realized how exactly Nikki had attained my ticket. I watched as he slipped their back-stage passes away from them as they took turn ruffling their hands through his hair. He winked at me from a distance. My face burned and I looked away from the scene. I suddenly felt really dirty from having taken that ticket.

He said his goodbyes and made his way back over to me. He smirked as he clutched at my arm and we quickly walked away from where the girls were. They would soon realize that their passes were gone and that they now belonged to us.

"Is that your secret?" I asked a bit more snappishly than I intended.

He smirked, "Jealous?"

"No," I sniffed. "Not at all."

"Ready to see this time-traveling friend of yours?" He asked, wiggling the pass.

No.

Yes.

"I'm nervous," I admitted in an odd moment of weakness in front of Nikki.

We walked towards the backstage where there were a few others. There weren't many of us. We ducked in as soon as we could, waving the passes at security as we saw one of the girls from before. Her eyes widened as she saw us but it was too late as we practically ran down the hall.

"Queen is right in that room, over there-" The security guard pointed at the door to the right of us. A few of the other backstage passers waltzed in and we followed quickly behind them. I could tell that even Nikki was a bit excited over it. Queen was still quite legendary, even to him.

We walked in and I spotted Roger, Brian, and John.

I could hear the legend himself laughing over a glass of wine. I wanted to faint. Freddie's eyes seemed to sparkle as they looked over the flock of fans who had enough money to get backstage passes. I assume they must have been looking for groupies, partiers alike themselves. Don't let the movie fool you - every band member aside from John (there was a Mick in every group truly) had their wild moments. Of course, they had been four young men given millions. It was expected of them.

"What a lively bunch you are," Freddie said. He held out his hand in greeting. I took it shakily and he gave a few quick pumps before moving onto the other fans. I was looking around for Joe. I didn't see him. He must have been loading up the tour buses or something.

I swallowed deeply. "Excuse me...Mr. Mercury-"

"Freddie, darling," he turned to gaze back at me.

"I-I was looking for a man named Joe."

It went so silent that they could hear a pin drop.

"Joe?" Roger spoke up. "You know Joe?"

"Yes,"

"I only saw him a few moments ago," I heard John murmur.

"Yeah, but that's not the point," Brian whispered. "She knows Joe."

Unfortunately, years of performing musically had left his whispering level much to be desired and I could hear every single word.

"Perhaps it's best if you stay a bit more," Freddie said.

I felt uncomfortable under the stares of everyone but Nikki. There was nothing but pure jealousy in the eyes of the other fans as they soon had to leave after hanging around with the band for a few moments more than anyone else. Not even the pretty girls had been allowed to stay. That was how seriously the band Queen was taking it.

"He's with me," I had said in regards to Nikki.

"What a lovely couple," Freddie said and both Nikki and I froze. "Now, there is something you should know about Joe-"

Neither of us had time to deny it before the door opened once more.

"What a proper good show, lads-"

It was the sound of his light, raspy voice. I twisted my head so quickly, it almost flew off. A smile adorned my face. It was the largest, brightest smile I could give. "Joe!" I gleamed as I saw the tall figure duck into the room. I couldn't help myself as I ran to give wrap my arms around him in a tight hug.

I had never hugged him before.

My world came crashing down around me when he murmured the words: "Who are you?"

"What?" I said confusedly.

"Joe has amnesia," Roger said nonchalantly from behind me.

"It's only been like that for about a week. He had a seizure and uh..We weren't expecting it. He hit his head awfully hard."

"He has epilepsy," I spoke absent-mindedly. My excitement had dimmed and had been replaced with dread.

"How do you know that?" Joe demanded.

"Because I'm your best friend."

It was nothing but heart-breaking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOF. Thank ya'll for all the support last chapter! I knew you would like it! I'm also getting better! Much better!


	29. Ballroom Blitz by Sweet

Joe seemed only slightly remorseful of his amnesia, but despite knowing nothing about himself, he was still Joe and he kept those feelings to himself. Otherwise, he put on a facade of nonchalance. I could still tell that he was troubled. After all, I had just become the only connection he ever had to knowing anything about himself.

"We're only here for one more night, but then we're back to London. We might be able to bring you back with us, if you so choose-" Freddie stated as he handed me a glass of strawberry champagne. I had chosen it over the wine.

I wished more than anything that I had brought my phone. Imagine getting to take a picture with THE Freddie Mercury. It would be worth more than my entire existence. It would probably be one of the greatest things I could have ever attained, but, sadly, my phone was kept safely in the apartment. Hopefully, at least. The boys knew not to touch it, but they most definitely knew not to look for it. But since when did the Motley boys ever listen to anything anyone ever told them.

Nikki was talking to John about bass player stuff. I was all too focused on Joe, who had seated himself silently, a cigarette in one hand. Some things never changed. "You are aware that you're asthmatic, right?" I asked playfully, but his eyes snapped over to mine. They did not look happy. "I'll take that as a no," I babbled, "You're also allergic to hazelnuts. Just letting you know that before you decide to nom on some chocolate and, I dunno, die."

"I already feel like death," He rolled his eyes and took a puff of his cigarette.

"You know, this isn't the first time you've gotten amnesia," I explained. His eyes gleamed curiously as I continued to speak. "It's how we found out you were epileptic. You hit your head on the bathroom once and you forgot basically everything."

"Funny, because that's exactly how it happened, so they tell me." Joe rolled his shoulders. "Apparently, Freddie found me convulsing on the bathroom floor." He tapped at his head with a free hand and I saw the nasty bruise that still seemed to mar that side of his skull. He was growing his hair out. It was only fitting considering the state of Queen. All of them but Brian had shaved off their beautiful, seventies hair, but it was still much longer than what Joe had often preferred. That much I knew.

"Do you know...Where you're from?" I asked tentatively.

"Where I'm from?" He huffed. "Not that future stuff, again. I've got enough sense to know-"

I looked over at the band.

"All of you know that we're from the future?"

Roger scoffed, "Yep."

He didn't seem to keen on the idea himself.

"I personally wouldn't believe it myself, darling, if not for the fact I saw him pop out of the ceiling."

"-And he knew stuff about us that we never told any fan, not ever," Brian added on. "He played us songs on my guitar that we hadn't even made yet, but we all knew...Those were our songs just because of how they sounded. He's a bloody good guitar player!"

"I know," I smiled sadly. "He also knows his way around a piano, although he's not as good."

He had done the opposite that I had done with Motley Crue. I knew that Freddie Mercury was Joe's hero. I knew how much he had cared for him, even though they never had any chance of ever meeting, until now, and for a good chunk of it, he couldn't even remember.

"I'm from the future, too," I mentioned to the band, but I mostly aimed it at Joe.

"You're joking. Alright then, tell me about myself."

"Even more than I already know?"

Nikki was barely able to keep up with it. I could tell. See, Joe spoke in a very northern, British accent that was often not-even coherent at times. I had long mastered how to understand him due to the long phone-calls we shared over a lovely game called Roblox - and other silly, online games.

"Well, Joe. Your full name is Joseph Charles Alexander McGillicuddy. You're twenty years old. You were born on December 25th, 2000. You're twenty years old. You have eleven sisters, you're married to a girl named Olive, and together you have a set of quadruplets - all of whom are named after the band Queen."

Joe busted out laughing as I told him this. I remained my composure, though and he soon realized that I was completely and entirely serious.

"You're not joking?"

I shook my head, "Nope."

"I have a wife?"

"Yes."

"And four kids?"

"Mhmm."

"Blimey, I must be mad."

I did laugh at this because Joe often said that same statement dozens and dozens of times throughout the day - usually accompanied by a brief statement as to what had happened to deserve that statement.

"After us? Sweet Joe, you shouldn't have," Freddie mocked.

"I'm surprised he didn't tell you," I said.

"He never told us much about himself. Just...about us."

"Figures," I shrugged. "Joe doesn't like to talk about himself."

"Joe also doesn't like it when you talk about him as though he isn't in the same fucking room," Joe bit back.

"Hey, listen asshole," I heard Nikki stand up from across the room. "We didn't just drive ten hours to come see you - for you to be a dick."

"Relax, Nikki,"

He refused to look at me as he clenched his fists and he stared straight into the eyes of Joe. Joe was leaning against the wall, but he pushed himself off and it became clear as to just how tall Joe was in comparison to Nikki. He stood a good three inches off the ground, coupled by a pair of boots, which rose him another two inches. He was a fucking giant. If Nikki was worried about potentially losing a fight, he didn't show it.

"Now, now boys. Let's all get along," Freddie remarked from behind us. "It's been a lovely evening thus far."

I put a hand over Nikki's arm and he let me pull him back. "We can always go," I murmured.

"No, no, lovely. You must stay. Share some coke with us."

Freddie pulled out a stick. It wasn't a dollar bill. No, Freddie was classier than that. It was more like a glass tube with a fancy ornamentation on it. I soon saw the blow on the table. Bohemian Rhapsody had really, really made things far more family-friendly than they actually were.

"I'm...clean for now," I stammered out. "I have to drive home."

Nikki didn't hesitate as he shared some of their blow. He snorted it up and smiled to himself. "That's - that's good stuff," He hissed out.

"Only the good stuff for us, darling," Freddie laughed as he snorted some up himself. "You sure you don't want any?" He offered.

"I have to drive us home," I said once more.

"Nonsense. We can book you a hotel room." Freddie said with a wave of his hand. See, I had been doing so well, but my fingers twitched and I felt a familiar sting in my nose. I wanted it. I really, really wanted it. I don't need it. I don't need it. I don't need it. I tried to sway myself, but I already knew that the moment he offered that I was weak. I was so, so weak. Besides, it was only this one exception. It was fucking Queen.

I smiled as I proceeded to take his offer.

Joe didn't hesitate either.

I could no longer say that Joe would be disappointed, could I?

After all, he wasn't really Joe at that moment. He was an empty canvas. As far as they knew, he had yet to remember anything. That was never a good sign. Even I knew that for a fact. The last time it had happened - it had taken Joe a good month to even remember most things (and there were still things that came back spontaneously months and months later).

It was now Mick I had to be worried about.

I knew that Nikki wouldn't tell though.

The night became a fuzz, blurred over party where the sounds of music and laughter reined over the sounds of common sense. I didn't remember much of it, but I could remember feeling nothing but elation.

When I woke up that next morning, I was in a bed with white blankets and white sheets, aside from smears of blood near my waist. I was only half-naked, my shirt still on, and I could see my pants kicked off to the side.

The sleep fell out of my eyes as I eyed the body that laid next to mine.

Nikki slept peacefully on, unaware that I was about to have a meltdown.

Oh.

My.

God.

Had I slept with Nikki?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I'm kind of evil.


	30. Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy by Queen

I stared at the naked back of the boy that I had been intensely crushing on for a good few months. He hadn't. We hadn't! There was no possible way. I grabbed at the pillow beneath me and swung it at him relentlessly. It collided with him and the sound of it slapping at his skin brought me more satisfaction than words can describe. Nikki jerked awake as he jolted away from my well-aimed hits.

"What the fuck, Nova!" He yelled out as he fell against the floor. "Why the fuck are you hitting me?"

"Did you have sex with me you bastard?" I demanded an explanation, clutching the pillow to me.

"What?" He asked confusedly before glancing at me, the bareness of my legs. He adorned a smirk on his face. "And so what if I did. It takes two to tango, you fucking psycho harpy."

"I definitely did NOT consent to having sex with you-you-" I threw the pillow at him and watched as he dodged it smugly.

"Ha, missed-"

I used the pillow he had been sleeping on to make sure he ate his words. It fell against his face and threw it off of him grumpily. "The fuck woman, is it really such a big deal?"

"Yes!" I exclaimed. "I'd saved it this long - I had figured I may as well lose it to someone special!"

"Oh, you're one of those."

"Yes, I'm one of those. Look at me! Do I seem like the type of girl to just give it away."

As I moved, I began to feel a weird sensation. It was familiar but in the bad sort of way. It caught up me off guard and it made me stop in the middle of my sentence as I concentrated on the horrific feeling of something slimy oozing out of me. I then went so pale as the blood ran out of my face and straight out of my vagina.

"Nova?" Nikki called out but I ignored him in favor of letting my fingers fall down to graze at the center of my legs. I pulled them up to inspect the shiny, red blood that coated them. I hadn't had a single period since I had traveled back. This was all fine and well, of course, because, in truth, I hadn't had one in many months prior to my time traveling. That's just simply how Nova Delacroix was. It was a biological condition that hampered many of the women in my family. We got the perk of having a few periods throughout the year, but in return, we struggled to have children.

It was one of those things that I had never even thought about. I often forgot that periods were something that most girls got every month. I was almost grateful for it, if not for the fact that it made predicting when my periods would come near impossible.

"Nova?" He called out again.

I finally heard it and I jerked my head up in response before glaring. "We didn't have sex, you asshole!"

Nikki openly smirked in response. His eyes then zoned in on my hand. He wasn't an idiot. In fact, Nikki was quite smart. But the look he gave me wasn't one of disgust, but one of clear want. I flinched at the sight of it. I had almost forgotten that Nikki no doubt had a bit of blood kink going on during this time period. I put my hand down, accidentally smearing blood on the sheets. I felt bad, looking at the mess I had made. I was tempted to call someone and tell them that I had ruined their sheets, but the very idea made my face burn bright red.

"Fuck," I groaned as I stood up, trying to cover my lower half, while at the same time fishing for my pants. "I'm going to have to freebleed until we get home or stop somewhere or something."

"I'm all out of cash," Nikki piped up bemusedly.

"You're such a dick," I spat.

He pushed himself back up to his feet. He was unabashedly naked. I couldn't help flicker my eyes down for just half a second before looking away. Nikki had a hard-on. He seemed to smile at the fact that I had looked. "I'm not the one who bled all over the sheets," he said as he clambered back onto the bed. There was a purr to his voice as he spoke and it sent shivers down my spine. He sat on his stomach, his legs just teetering off the edge of the bed as he grabbed at my wrist.

"Nikki," I warned, but I could feel my voice faltering. There was always something so intimate when it was just the two of us alone. It was the sparks of chemistry that undulated throughout the room. I could feel it in my veins, pulsing through my finger-tips. The other day had been the farthest either of us had ever gone with each other. Had we not been interrupted - he probably would have gotten my off mid-drive. I can't believe I had let that happen.

"Nova," he smirked playfully.

He gently tugged at my hand once but then proceeded to catch me off guard when the second tug was much more forceful. I found myself flopping right next to him and our heads collided painfully. We both let out pained curses. I rubbed at my forehead. "That's what you get," I shrugged.

He laughed and it was such a solid, boy-ish laugh that made me want to just burrow into the sheets with him. He still had a grip on my arm though and he stretched out his fingers as he ran them sensually over my skin. I could feel the goosebumps rise up as my mouth went dry. He pulled himself onto his knees as he ducked his head down and kissed at my jaw-line and then at my neck.

Nikki had never done that before.

His other hand thought it was clever, sly as it ducked down to dance across my thighs. It was when I felt his hand dip down into the extra-moist area that I lurched and found my hands pushing at his chest, but only gently because a good part of me didn't want this to end. I was sober now and more grounded than ever before. I felt more true to myself since sobering up, but also since...Joe...Joe? Joe!

"What? Nova!" Nikki sighed, exasperated. "Come back up here!"

His hand was coated in my blood. I tried too much not to think about it. I tugged my jeans on as quickly as I could and ignored the squelchy feeling of the blood dripping down between my thighs. "I have to go see Joe!" I said frantically. "I have to see him before he leaves."

I didn't even get the chance to see the heavily disgruntled look upon his face. It was almost too early for Nikki to have his mask on in place. Had I bothered to glance at it - I likely would've been more tempted to stay, to let things escalate, to let things go irreversibly different.

It didn't take long for me to run out of the room, fully clothed, definitely bleeding still. I found an elevator at the end of the hallway. I clicked at the button and squeezed my thighs tightly together as some sort of comfort. The doors went open after about twenty seconds. Luckily for me, the elevator was completely empty. I pressed the button to the bottom floor and I dashed out as soon as the doors opened.

"Excuse me," I yelled out to the desk lady. I had to breathe in between each word. It had been a while since I had to run for anything and for the chance of saying goodbye to Joe, I had run as fast as I possibly could. The lady pursed her lips, making herself look like a fish, as she took in my bedraggled appearance. "The band Queen...Have they left yet? I was with them- I needed to say goodbye."

"I'm afraid it's too late. They left hours ago."

"Hours ago? A bit early for that..." I said as my shoulders slouched and my eyes burned.

The woman pushed forward a box of tissues. I ignored them.

"What time is it?" I asked.

The woman rolled her eyes and pointed up at the giant clock behind her. I flushed and murmured, "Sorry. Late night."

It was nearly three in the afternoon.

"Mr. Mercury did leave this for you," The woman then piped up as she slid a piece of paper in front of me. I smiled as I realized that it held a telephone number. He had written a lovely note regarding that I could contact Joe through him. Unfortunately, Mr. Mercury had long forgotten just how expensive it was to talk to people overseas. I was more than thankful that I even had his number, however. I knew it wouldn't be the last time I got to see Joe. Queen wasn't done releasing albums and knowing Joe - he would stick with them until the end.

"Thank you," I said softly.

I felt a hand clamp down on my shoulder. I yelped and smacked at whoever was behind me. Nikki was quick though and stopped my hand before I could wack him across the chest with it. He was dressed and he had Tommy's keys in hand.

It was time for us to head back to Los Angeles.


	31. Goodbye To Romance by Ozzy Osbourne

There was something so surreal about it just being Nikki and I driving through California. We were rarely, truly along together outside of the Motley House. Time seemed to last longer in that span of a day and a half of traveling and for a few bliss hours there was nothing and no one but Nikki and I. My inner romantic deduced that it felt meant to be. Of course, I didn't show let anyone but myself think that and I vehemently protested that Nikki and I would be anything but what we already were - which was confused and horny.

Maybe in the future...Maybe...When not just Nikki got his shit together, but when I got my shit together. I had become quite problematic. I knew this. I had done my best at trying to fix it - I had already even failed multiple times. But I had yet to hit rock bottom. I hoped I never would.

Nikki had somehow stolen the keys out of my pockets and had been driving us down so far. He was much better at driving than I was. We bit words at each other, until I made him stop at a general store early on. It was located next to a gas station, so while I clamped my legs together, hoping to stop the trickle of blood from dropping down any further, I made him go off to steal me a pack of tampons. They had to be the good stuff, too. It was the first period that I had gotten in a LONG while and usually - they didn't hold back.

"Here," Nikki fished over a ten-dollar bill. "Fill it up as much as you can."

"I knew you lied about not having any money," I accused.

He snorted, "What are you, my wife?"

"No, but I am apparently your girlfriend."

I regretted it the moment I said it, but it had lingered on in my mind so much these past few hours that it had accidentally slipped out as quite impressive comeback. I tried to fix a smirk on my face to let him to know that I was just joking. It apparently looked more awkward than it felt.

He rolled his eyes, "You wish you were my girlfriend."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I objected as the smirk fell from my face.

"You want me. I don't want you-"

I saw red.

"Excuse me, I don't know who think you're feeling, but it ain't me, chief. I've never once initiated whatever the fuck we've done the last day and a half. It's all been you."

We stared at each other - green eyes on green eyes. I felt that same urge to kiss him, even though I was infuriated. I didn't even want to think about what he had been feeling these past few days? Was making me uncomfortable just a game to him? I didn't expect to be his girlfriend. Hell, I had mostly convinced myself that I didn't even want to be. But to sit there and say that he didn't want me? If that wasn't the biggest piece of bullshit. The least he could do was be honest about it. Even so, what made me so different? Nikki had held plenty of girlfriends? What really made me the odd-one-out.

"Before he could he even say anything else, I brought my gaze down. "Just go, please."

For some reason, Nikki listened and I watched him approach the general store and go inside of it. Hopefully, he would find some in there. We had stolen a pillow from the hotel and I had been sitting on it in the passenger seat. Unfortunately, there were already splotches of blood from where I had been sitting. I wouldn't just need the tampons for the trip, but for the remainder of the week. I'd be surprised if they lasted that long, however.

As I held the pump to the valve, watching as the numbers went up and up, I could already feel my stomach muscles tensing up. Even though I had been through so much these past few days, I knew that I would still hate my periods with a passion until the day I died. Ten dollars would just barely be enough. It was hard to remember that we were actually quite poor, mostly because all the boys spent their money on was booze and drugs. I actually had stuff of value, but the idea of selling of any Linda's stuff just about killed me inside. I knew I would have to do it, eventually.

Now that I was off blow (for the most part), I actually felt things like hunger and exhaustion (which only caused more hunger). I needed to eat food. The high from any of the drugs we did last night had long run off. I could feel my stomach rumbling aside from the period cramps. I tried not to think about it. Nikki had already swept off to the general store and no doubt the idea of food wouldn't even cross his mind.

I put the gas pump up as I waited for the door to the store to open. Nikki was the opposite of sly. He had the tampons stuffed right under his arm. I narrowed my eyes at him. He waved at me as he didn't even run from the store. He walked at a leisure pace, as if he wanted to be caught. I narrowed my eyes disapprovingly at him, although I doubt he could see them from the place he was. He had a fuzzy tint around him. I couldn't even read the sign of the store properly. I tried not to think about it. I had long lost my pair of glasses back home, but my vision hardly concerned me, but there were some instances where my slowly dying vision made it's intent well-known. This was one of those few moments.

"What are you doing?" I hissed at him.

"There's only an old lady in there," he shrugged. "She's as blind and deaf as a bat. She didn't even notice me take it."

It made me feel even worse about stealing.

Stealing.

That's what we were doing. This was probably some old lady's store. My mind went to frantic places as I groaned at how skewed my moral compass had become. It was another thing I definitely didn't want to think about.

"Give me the tampons," I held out my hand for them.

"Whatcha gonna do for them?" He smirked.

"Bleed all over Tommy's seats," I dead-panned.

He snorted as he handed them over. I opened the back of the van, making sure to close the doors as I shimmied my pants off. The inside of my pants were a mess and my thighs were coated in a light sheen of blood. The metallic scent hit me like a bullet. I pulled one of the tampons out and inserted it.

My hands were coated in blood, but at this point, I didn't care and was thoroughly over having my period - and it was only day one! I got up into the front seat and wiped my hands over my pants. They were already ruined enough. Another few splotches of blood would hardly hurt them anymore.

The two of us seated in the van were now placed into an awkward silence. Nikki's hand lingered over the ignition as he held the key against it. He seemed to hesitate as he side-glanced at me, thinking I wouldn't notice, but I did, because I was equally side-glancing him. I think we both knew that the Nikki and Nova adventures were over for now. Once again, we would be thrust back into the life of Motley Crue. He loved it. So did I. He turned the van on and it hummed to life.

I grabbed at the seat-belt but then realized that Nikki wasn't driving to the main road, no, he was pulling out behind the half-abandoned store beside the gas station. Not the general store, but it looked to be an old pizza place. It was just this main trio and behind it was a small town full of white trash Californians. Well, not exactly behind it - about a mile and a half behind it.

"Nikki," I said quietly. "What are you doing?"

It was another moment of silence before his arms went flying as he grabbed at my face and pulled it against his. I was caught up in shock as Nikki practically rammed into his teeth against my mouth so hard I thought my own would shatter. Three seconds was all it took me to respond before I ran my hands through his messy hair (which had deflated in size over the course of nearly two days).

I pulled back and I couldn't keep the smile from growing over my face as I looked into his eyes. "And to think - you don't want me?"

"Shut up," He growled as he pulled me back into a kiss.

He was not soft.

He was anything but.

This was firm, fiery, and aggressive Nikki. I had almost missed him. He had been so pleasant as of late that I had wondered where he had disappeared off to. It wasn't to say that I didn't mind Nikki being un-Nikki-like, but it was nothing but confusing. Tommy was supposed to play the chivalrous role, not Nikki, and it was throwing me in for a loop and sending all of my emotions haywire.

I laughed against his kiss.

But as his hands stopped grasping at my face and started going down, down, down. I jolted at the feel of his warm hands cup my breasts - I could feel them so prominently against my shirt. There was the sneaking idea of how nice, how warm they would feel without the shirt. However, it soon went into unpleasant territory when he groped them roughly and moved to take my shirt off.

"Woah," I pulled back. "Woah."

"What?"

"We're...We're behind a gas station," I argued weakly.

"So?"

"We could get caught?"

He furrowed his brow and sighed roughly. "Can you just not - for one second?"

"What the hell do you mean?"

"That! Can you not think or question for once in your life!?"

I sputtered, "Um - Somebody has to!"

"Really?"

"Yes! Besides," I sniffed, "I just put a tampon in and there is no way I'm losing my virginity behind a gas station while on my fucking period. There are better times."

"So you're saying there will be another time?"

I could only gape.

When had it come to this? We were only halfway through our trip and already things had changed so much. "You play too much," I rolled my eyes and pulled my shirt completely down as I adjusted myself back into the seat. "Can we just go home?"

He started the van back up again.

I eyed him for the rest of the journey. I had no idea when he would catch me off guard or whether or not he would force my hand back onto his dick to get him off again. I had enjoyed it, but that was a secret I would keep deeply, deeply inside of myself.

When we got back to Motley house, I practically ran into the door. It was filthy, as usual. Not even me tidying things up could truly hold back the mess known as Motley Crue. I ran through the doors of the house, ignoring the shocked and or concerned looks from both Tommy, Mick, and even Vince. I knew where I was headed and there was no one stopping me. I threw myself onto my bed and proceeded to ignore any sign of life for the remainder of the day.

Night soon came, though.

And soon enough I felt a familiar skinny, giant hop onto my bed. I looked up from my pillow to glance at him. Tommy smiled as he latched on. "Was Queen awesome?"

"Hell yeah," I murmured softly.

"And your friend?" Tommy asked tentatively.

"It's him. I know it is."

"I'm guessing it didn't go so well."

I shook my head, "It went okay - just different."

"Different?"

"He has seizures and he - he must have hit his head again."

I had tried so, so hard to pretend that it hadn't bothered me. I really had. I had even done a really good job at fooling myself, but sitting on my bed in the dark, with Tommy looking over at me with his kind, soft, puppy-dog eyes...I just felt myself tear up. I wiped away the tears with my sleeve.

"He doesn't remember who I am," my voice cracked. "He doesn't even know who he is."

"Well, shit," he let out a breath as his large hands rubbed against my shoulder. "That fucking sucks, dude."

I let out a pained smile as I leaned into his touch.

"I did get Freddie Mercury's phone number though."

"No way!" Tommy jumped in excitement. "You're joking?"

"I'm not."

"That's fucking sick-"

Tommy rambled on and on and on over his love for Queen. I listened to him speak and it calmed me through my sadness. The world was once again right. And if I thought my feelings for Nikki would get any simpler - I was dead wrong, because Lita Ford from the Runaways would soon make her debut.


	32. Heartbreaker by Led Zeppelin

Lita didn't come in quickly.

Nikki had been dating some other girl, Stephanie, who had switched to Vince soon enough. Stephanie never bothered me, of course, because I knew that she wasn't the type of girl Nikki that Nikki would've dated unless she had drugs. And boy, did Stephanie have access to drugs. I had never done any sort of pills. I may have tried molly once, but it wasn't something that I could remember. It was probably when I was high on cocaine for far longer than I should've been...When I was mourning Linda.

I tried not to think of Linda too often, though. It always led to some depressing thoughts and then itching in my nose. Mick had not and would never find out about me giving in with Nikki while we were backstage with Queen. I wasn't afraid of disappointing Nikki or Vince - Tommy was not the type to ever be disappointed in me, but Mick. God, I hated the way he looked at us sometimes. He knew, as well as I did, how horribly unsustainable our lifestyles were. I wonder how long he was giving each of us? When he looked at Nikki, did he see what laid in the future?

I knew Nikki's future. I knew what it would come to.

What did Mick see when he looked at me?

A boring, ordinary girl who had been dropped into something that would become far bigger than she ever would be?

That's what I saw, at least.

That's how I felt, even.

It was the morning after one of the most legendary shows that the boys had played in their careers as of yet. There were a few things that made this the most memorable of their lifetimes so far. One, Elvira announced them. Elvira was kind of a popular figure - a creepy, horror sex symbol who was amazingly gorgeous. Her set of badonkadonks poked so far out of her dress...I kept having to shift my eyes because they would always be drawn back to those two white globes. I may have been a loser, but I had some taste.

And after she had introduced them, they went to town with their music.

In the midst of performing Public Enemy #1, Nikki had set his legs on fire. It was a beautiful experience watching a man so gorgeous and toxic go up in flames. It was art. Vince brought out a trick of chopping off the heads of mannequins with a chainsaw, but that didn't last and didn't have the impact as the flames did. The fire was a beautiful entity, an almost uncontrollable being when placed into the hands of the four members of one of the most notorious bands of the eighties.

I half-expected Nikki to collapse in pain on the stage as the fire ate at his leather-clad legs. It was no doubt burning him, but it was Nikki. Nikki couldn't even show weakness to his bandmates, much less the crowd-watchers. The show ended. I now had all of the songs memorized completely. The electricity never left for me. I was always in constant awe. Of course, the time-travel may have been the culprit of that. For me, it was watching history be made, but the people in the crowd, the people the roared and screamed beside me - they had no idea and probably didn't even care about the future or the past. It was all in the now.

Sometimes, I wish I could feel like that.

It was awkward now when Tommy slung his hands over my shoulder. Time never felt as slow with him as it did with Nikki. I knew it was because I wasn't attracted to him in the same way as I was with Nikki. I don't why, but it just wasn't the same. I wished it were. I could handle Tommy. I knew I could. I could handle the way he broke my heart because he was lovable in other ways. He was not yet tarnished. He was not yet Nikki's true terror twin as he would become.

The night Nikki and I had left for Queen. The way they had tricked that girl...That was only the beginning of it.

She had been in the crowd the night before. I hadn't completely recognized her until later on. Although, she had caught my eye once or twice. Lita Ford was a beautiful girl with bright blonde hair and an aura of chaotic, yet pleasant energy. She was a rocker, of course. That was what Nikki would like about her. It was what any sane person would love about her. She was someone that even Nikki could love.

I think that's what scared me the most.

I didn't want Nikki.

I didn't want Nikki.

These were the lies that I kept feeding myself over and over and over again.

But I knew they were just lies.

I did want him.

I wanted him, badly.

There wasn't a day that went by where I didn't think about him (or any of the other members of Motley Crue), but mostly him.

It would be a few more concerts before she and Nikki would officially get into a relationship. In fact, by that point, Vince would have traded Stephanie in for a woman called Beth. Beth would stick around for some time. She was pleasant enough, of course, but there was only so much trust I could place in a woman who would actually date a rocker. It was like a ticking time-bomb for crazy since she, herself, wasn't in the music business.

It didn't take long for me to walk back-stage to find Nikki pushing down his pants as fast as possible. They had managed to beat all the flames out, but there were red sores all over his body. It wasn't super bad - the burns. It could have gone way worse. It was at the top of the pants and at the bottoms, near his ankles, where the burns were the worst. That was where the fire had reared up and met skin.

"Fuck, dude!" Tommy exclaimed as he passed over a bottle of Jack Daniel's towards Nikki's outstretched hand. Nikki downed half of it in one take before he poured some on the burns on his waist and ankles. He didn't wear any underwear. A few months ago, I would've been beet red, but now it barely registered to me that he was even naked. Living with a bunch of men did that to a girl. "That has to fucking hurt."

"It's worth it," Nikki gritted his teeth. "The crowd went fucking nuts for it, man. You went a little heavy on the lighter fluid."

He narrowed his eyes at Mick, who shrugged and said, "I just couldn't help myself."

"We're gonna have to clean your legs up," I piped up as I kept glancing at the burns. "Pouring Jack Daniel's on them won't do jack shit knowing how hygienic you lot are."

"Are you offering?" Nikki said with a lazy smile.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, Nikki. As a matter of fact, I am. The last thing we need is a bass who can barely walk because of the puss-filled burns on his legs and torso."

"She's got a point, Sixx," Mick spoke up helpfully. I smiled at him, grateful for it. Two were always better than one when it came to reason.

I pursed my lips, "We probably won't be able to do it here."

Nikki groaned as he snapped, "I'm fine. I don't need you to be a mother hen."

"I'm not being a mother hen!"

I looked up for some support and saw all of the bandmembers scratching at their heads and awkwardly refusing to answer.

"Fine, then! Suffer for all I care!" I huffed.

I stormed out of the back of the Troubadour and found myself leaning back against the van. There was a brief moment of silence. It was peaceful. A part of me yearned for life to be like this always. It had been that way back home. I was always locked in my room with nothing but the sounds of a fan and my music to keep me company. Now, my life was filled with so much noise - so many people. Linda was dead. Joe was an amnesiac touring with Queen. I was in love with Nikki. I barely even knew Vince and Mick was the horribly cliche, yet wise old-man who spoke words of wisdom (underlined with hints of sarcasm and sardonic humor). And Tommy? Tommy was the boy that I should be in love with, not Nikki.

There was the sound of heeled boots clicking on the concrete. I looked up to find Tommy bouncing over to no doubt comfort me. I let a small smile cover my face. Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"Hey!" He said.

"Hey," I repeated back.

He slid open the van door and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He pulled one of the death sticks out and inhaled it deeply and then let the smoke pour out from his face. He was the heaviest smoker of all of us. I didn't even bother lecturing him over it. I didn't really have a right to because I then motioned for one of those death sticks.

"You've never smoked before," he snorted as handed one over. "That trip with Nikki must have been really interesting."

"Yeah, we met Queen!" I faked a grin as I let Tommy use a lighter to light the end of the cigarette.

Tommy's face fell for a second, "That's not what I meant. Nova, I might be an idiot, but I'm not that dumb."

"I don't know what you mean," I said softly. I then tried to copy as Tommy did with the cigarette. As the smoke went down, I sputtered and coughed as I tried to get it out of my lungs - the smoke left a burning trail behind it.

"You and Nikki had sex," Tommy said blankly.

"What! No!" I sputtered once more and this time it wasn't because of the cigarette.

Tommy continued to speak as if he didn't hear me, "It's okay. I understand. I don't mind, to be honest. I want you to be open with me about these kinds of things. I don't mind shari-"

"Tommy..I didn't sleep with Nikki!" I interrupted his tangent. "But...We came close. Too close for my liking."

"You didn't sleep with Nikki?" Tommy repeated. "Oh, damn. I owe Mick five dollars. So does Vince!"

"You had a bet," I spoke numbly. It was that obvious? I nearly punched my own brain for that. Of course, it was obvious. I had only been mooning over Nikki for the past six or so months. Shock soon replaced the numbed feeling. "Wait! You thought I would sleep with him!"

"It isn't just guys who have needs, Nova." Tommy huffed. "The entire time you've been here - all you've done is make out with a girl...That is all you've done right?"

"Yes, Tommy." I rolled my eyes.

"That's it! You're the most virginal virgin I know." He then reached to playfully pinch at my cheek. I couldn't help the smile from lighting up my face as I tried to shove the hand away. He moved his hand from my cheek to wrap it around my shoulders. I was pulled into his side. "You know who to come to if you ever wanna lose it," He winked.

I thought about having sex with Tommy. Unfortunately, there was no utter sense of revulsion. Instead, there was a brief feeling of content and I knew that if Tommy and I ever did have sex...I wouldn't hate it. I might even like it. I just knew that he would make me feel safe and wanted. Tommy was a romantic like that. As Tommy awaited my laughter at his joke - I realized that I had stayed silent for too long. Long enough for him to come down to a not-entirely-wrong conclusion.

"...Do you?" He asked.

"Hmm?" I questioned as I was completely brought from my thoughts.

"Do you wanna give your v-card to me?" He asked.

I struggled for an answer.

No.

Yes.

It had to be someone important...

But Tommy was important?

Then, it had to be somebody that I loved?

Well, not always.

"Y-yeah," I breathed out. "I do. I'd like to give you my v-card, Tommy."

He then broke out into laughter, causing me to frown.

"No, no," he said. "I'd love that. It's just...You're quite the businesswoman, Nova."

I snorted at that, "you're the first person to offer! I can't help being awkward about it."

We smiled at each other. I stamped out my cigarette and laced my arms completely around him. He inhaled one last puff before stamping out his as well. I wasn't there for the inevitable. I wasn't there to see Lita Ford offer Nikki a quaalude after he was done beating up some guy who had been pestering him over their music. But Nikki was the last thing on my mind in those moments with Tommy.

I now had to worry about my v-card which was now officially soon to be torn to shreds.


End file.
